Hate my new job, can I go back?

OMM 0000

Giblet wrote: »

I went back to my old job, because they gave me a **** ton of money. Hardly weak there?

That's obviously a very different scenario.

Giblet

OMM 0000 wrote: »

That's obviously a very different scenario.

LinkedIn doesn't know otherwise

OMM 0000

Giblet wrote: »

LinkedIn doesn't know otherwise

That's not relevant to what we're talking about though.

We're talking about the unhappy / aggressive people in the office who might think someone's weak because they returned due to their new job not working out.

I've seen it happen. It's not a big deal, but people should be aware of it and prepared for it.

I'm not saying I think she's weak.

ste

OP my advice is don't for a minute even conside if it shows weakness if you were to return to old job. It doesn't. Do what's best for you!

Might some dickheads whisper something negative on a coffee break? Sure!

The same people who bitch & moan about clothes ppl wear, their yogurt being re-posititioned in the fridge, Mary swanning around with her new handbag and Jimmy who just got a new tat!

Fck em

Ande1975

It just gets worse and worse.

I spent the weekend dreading today. God if I could only turn back time.
I feel sick and depressed.
I've spoken to everyone I need to speak with now. So its just a case of biding my time. I don't need this stress in my life right now.

Thanks to everyone who responded

OMM 0000

Ande1975 wrote: »

It just gets worse and worse.

I spent the weekend dreading today. God if I could only turn back time.
I feel sick and depressed.
I've spoken to everyone I need to speak with now. So its just a case of biding my time. I don't need this stress in my life right now.

Thanks to everyone who responded

Why don't you go to the doctor?

It's not normal for a job to be making you sick and depressed.

I'm not saying do this, but maybe a mild antidepressant or something like that could help take the edge off.

Ande1975

In fact I'm already on them. I've a lot going on in my life right now and this job just made everything worse.
I should have known better and I suspected this might happen.
I hope I haven't done damage to myself

mikep

Hi OP

It sounds like you have a plan in place to get outta the new job so that's good..

If you don't mind me suggesting this but perhaps counselling might help as you seem to have a lot going on added to by this workplace stress..

Take care!

Ande1975

thanks Mikep. I am in work and shaking. I'm just so stressed about being here.
I hope I can get out of here sooner rather than later.
I am speaking to someone Friday so I hope that helps me pull myself together

freida

Ande1975 wrote: »

thanks Mikep. I am in work and shaking. I'm just so stressed about being here.
I hope I can get out of here sooner rather than later.
I am speaking to someone Friday so I hope that helps me pull myself together

Ande1975 sorry to hear you are shaking in work. I just wanted to say, hang in there. You only have to get through the next half hour. Don't think beyond that.just get thru today one half hour at a time. Fingers crossed something turns up soon

Ande1975

freida wrote: »

Ande1975 sorry to hear you are shaking in work. I just wanted to say, hang in there. You only have to get through the next half hour. Don't think beyond that.just get thru today one half hour at a time. Fingers crossed something turns up soon

thanks Freida. I'm torturing myself here with the what ifs. Should have known this. Suspected this might happen but ignored my gut. Its all consuming.

mikep

Hi again

Perhaps you should take some time off, if you have any holiday time worked up, just to get you out of there for a few days so you can formulate a plan without the added stress of being in work.

Ande1975

mikep wrote: »

Hi again

Perhaps you should take some time off, if you have any holiday time worked up, just to get you out of there for a few days so you can formulate a plan without the added stress of being in work.

thanks I've only been here about 5 weeks so I don't have much accrued.
I can't concentrate and focus. I've told them about my personal issue and they are supportive but I just can't stand being here. I've just got so much stress in my life right now.

OMM 0000

What you're describing is very extreme. I really can't see how a job could be causing this much stress. I think the real problem is the issues you're facing outside of work. They're causing you to have no coping abilities, and every problem is being greatly enlarged in your mind.

I've worked in some absolutely messed up places, but there's never been anyone shaking at their desk, feeling sick and unable to concentrate.

The therapist on Friday can perhaps shed some light on this.

Can you quit?

Or go off sick?

Ande1975

I agree it is extreme and I'm so upset. I just knew straight away that this place wasn't for me.
I've a lot going on personally which is making this worse. I'm hoping the session Friday will start to help me make sense of this.

jayjay2010

Hi OP. I can completely relate to your story. I had a good job for 3 years and felt that I needed something new. I actually took a (big) pay-cut to move to a different job which seemed like all bells and whistles. Within 2 weeks I knew that I made a HUGE mistake. I simply hated the new job and I felt so envious of my old colleagues as we had a great friendship. I felt lonely in the new job and it was just not what I wanted to do. I lasted 2 months, which felt like forever. Thankfully, my old boss actually asked me to come back! I wouldn't have asked to come back as I would have been too embarrassed. But what I have learned is, go with your gut. Don't be embarrassed, don't feel ashamed. If you want to go back just ask. Worse case scenario they will say no, and at least then you can move on. I am a big believer in going with your gut, but everything happens for a reason. Do what you feel will make you happy.

jayjay2010

One more thing OP, don't listen to people saying that you are weak. You are not weak. If people criticise, let them. They would probably do the same if they were in your shoes. People need to stop worrying about other people think. Do what is right for you. If going back to your old job will make you happy, then you should definitely try to go back. Nothing is forever, you might move on again in a few years. I am currently in a job that I don't particularly like (hated at first) but I had to take it for my own reasons. I plan to leave in May, but I am staying positive until then as I know it is not forever. Like you, I left my great job but I had to make a decision (not the job mentioned above lol). If I can go back to my old job after May, I will. But if I can't, I will move onto something else. Just do what feels right for you, don't listen to anybody's criticism.

Ande1975

Thanks Jayjay2010. Your posts are music to my ears. A colleague here who is with this company 3 months told me that he told his boss that he is not happy and the job isn't what he thought he was. He said he wished he'd asked more questions during the interview process. I confided in him that I felt the same way and he said we are not the only ones. A weight almost lifted after we talked.

I'm keeping my contacts in the previous company warm and they are doing everything they can to bring me back. It'll probably take a few months as there are a lot of changes afoot but I am confident I'll be back there again.

Thank you again for making me realise I am not alone.

lapua20grain

Best of luck with it I hope you get what you want as the importance of being happy in a job is paramount. F##k the naysayers as they probably have never been in the same position. You should continue to look elsewhere and not only your past position so it will give you more options should the old job not come through, but i hope it works out for you.

Ande1975

Thank you lapua20grain, I am hoping things move fast there as I can't face the place. At least I know I am not alone. I'm concerned if I look elsewhere I'll make the same mistake. My confidence is shot as a result.
Being happy in a job is so important.

Ande1975

Back again and since I posted last, I've become very friendly with another 2 others. They are relatively new also and experienced the same as me. One even gave feedback to the manager and they didn't respond in a professional way.

People are just waiting to move on. I was thinking of expressing my concerns to another manager here (who I know from a long time back) and is a good person. Do you think that is advisable? Given our manager isn't capable of taking feedback, I was going to try another route.

Thanks

OMM 0000

I don't think it's a good idea, unless you are just looking for advice.

A better route is to go to your manager's manager.