What's your ultimate age limit (upper&lower!) when dating?

Deebles McBeebles

Was it not Pontius Pilot who did the nailing?

Doesn't roll off the tongue as well I suppose.

xi5yvm0owc1s2b

Deebles McBeebles wrote: »

Was it not Pontius Pilot who did the nailing?

Pilate gave the orders but it was Roman soldiers who did the actual nailing, by all accounts.

RacoonQueen

Have no interest in men my own age never my younger than me. 5 -10 year gap is generally what I go for. Not even intentionally really always just kinda happened that way and makes me never even consider guys I meet closer in age as potential partners.

Deebles McBeebles

Alvaro Damp Gateway wrote: »

Pilate gave the orders but it was Roman soldiers who did the actual nailing, by all accounts.

Ah Pilate, I was thinking of his cousin who flew planes for the Roman army back in the day :P

Greentopia

Alvaro Damp Gateway wrote: »

But a 40-year-old single woman will have almost no chance of dating men in their early 30s, most of whom are still chasing women in their 20s.

Not my experience in my early forties before my current relationship when I was looking for a partner! and some men younger than early thirties too.

I didn't just look locally though because I didn't want to limit myself (and I'm picky ), I cast my net wider and cultivated friendships online through social media in other countries with the kind of men I knew I would have certain important things in common with I wasn't prepared to compromise on. It worked and they turned into beautiful experiences.
I had two relationships with younger men who were not just there for sex like many of the ones who replied to my profile on online dating services I signed up to here! I'm still in contact with one and he is a good friend.

Alvaro Damp Gateway wrote: »

It might seem unfair, but that's biology for you. Once a woman hits her 30s, and especially her mid-30s, she's often just looking for a guy who will be stable, committed, caring, and a good dad. Maybe he's no Adonis, and maybe he's a few years older, but other things will matter more at that point.

That's true of course, biology and what many men want does work against us at that age if you want marriage and kids. I never wanted those two things, only a reliable caring long term partner so it was easier perhaps.

Definitely depends on the type of guy you want though and your values. That will narrow the search a lot and make life easier in the long run. I found anyway. I never wanted a guy with money and status, they're simply not important to me so long as he can support himself financially. I was unattractive to some men whose values I didn't share anyway.

I also steered clear of guys who only wanted someone nice on their arm or who only wanted me because they liked how I look. Making sure we have a lot in common and the same value systems and views on life was for me the most important thing (aside from the obvious that he should be kind, thoughtful, considerate, smart).

Greentopia

Emme wrote: »

I'm late 40s and that ship has sailed for me. It's not what I wanted but that's the way life went. Like somebody said, life can turn on you in a second. I'm also single and have a lot going on (busy job, elderly family etc.) so I'm not interested in dating. Just as well really when I read some of the posts here.

I'm not being horrible but I would advise you to broaden your net a bit. Be open to dating guys up to 50. Some 50 somethings are very fit these days, into cycling, triathlons etc. They would be very happy to date a 38 year old.

Men don't have a biological clock so as a woman gets into her 30s if she wants a child she has to upwardly adjust the age range of the men she is willing to date.


This is a dangerous fallacy. If you want something you have to be proactive and take the steps necessary to get it. Learn from those who have failed. Do not depend on fate.

Good advice, definitely can't leave it to fate to meet a committed partner, you have to be proactive and set it as a goal to do so.

Sorry things have worked out like that for you relationship wise. Being an older woman and looking for a lasting serious relationship can be hard and frustrating in this country when it seems all the good ones are either married already and sometimes the options are very limited for what's left if you have high standards! partly why I looked in other countries too. Honestly a lot of foreign men will find an Irish woman very attractive and interesting no matter if you're in your 40s! I could tell you stories
I think looking for a good friend at the start and someone you have a lot n common with is the best foundation for a relationship.

xi5yvm0owc1s2b

Greentopia wrote: »

That's true of course, biology and what many men want does work against us at that age if you want marriage and kids. I never wanted those two things, only a reliable caring long term partner so it was easier perhaps.

Fair enough. I'm just pointing out that while younger couples are generally close in age, older people are more likely to enter relationships with a significant age difference, usually with the man being the older partner.

As a woman ages, she's less likely to pair off with someone her own age. She'll often have better success with someone older.

chrissb8

chrissb8 wrote: »

No not really a false narrative.

But it is because you are basing it on nothing more than that narrative. Calling someone a "weirdo" - saying they "cant" get someone their age - when you know absolutely nothing about the person in question _other than_ the age of his current partner or then partner. Everything else after that piece of information you simply made up yourself to fit _your_ narrative.

chrissb8 wrote: »

Most people will go after those who have a similar position in life or a similar outlook.

It does not matter what "most" people do in any situation - even this one. People deviating from the norm is not automatically a problem. When you shout "weirdo" at people when you know literally zero about them other than that they fail to conform to some perceived norm - then you are in fantasy land feeding your own narratives and biases.

chrissb8 wrote: »

I mean use your head. What 16 year old girl have you met who is "just so mature" that they could hold an adult relationship....they can't because they aren't an adult.

Clearly you have not been keeping up with the thread if you have to ask me that given I met one of my current partners when she was 17 and I was 27. So when you ask me what girl I have met to fit that dynamic - I answer to you the one I have been sharing my life path with for 13 years now. With whom I, she, and our relationship has been going from strength to strength for that 13 years and she is currently well on the way to having our first baby together. All good stuff.

chrissb8 wrote: »

That says to me that the man has some deficent behaviours

My point exactly! It says that _to you_. You and your false narratives where you make up things about people you have never once met - all based off one single data point which is a trigger for you. You are making my point for me with every line you write. Ta for that!

chrissb8 wrote: »

There are obvious reasons why it's frowned upon I just can't understand why others are on this thread having to explain it.

There are reasons we should be vigilant in given situations for sure. There are _no_ justifiable reasons to jump to conclusions, paranoia, name calling, and demeaning judgements or dehumanization.

You think such people are not even "a person". That's just - wow. Says more about you that it does about me or them for sure. They are and always have been people to me. Perhaps you should take up your personal issues with the user who refers to them as "legal fanny". You and him seem entirely happy not to see people as people. I on the other hand do.