What's the etiquette here??

Brendan Bendar

JohnnyFlash wrote: »

Viz Annuals as well - especially the The Council Gritter from 2010, The Bear Trapper’s Hat from 2005, The Turtle’s Head from 98, and the seminal The Rusty Sherrif’s Badge from 92.

Don’t forget ‘ The Dogs Bollox’. John.

There will be a space and a shelf for ‘Pamphlets’.

Slideways

Its all fine and well reading delusional ramblings of some gimp in the Irish army on boards while laying cable but a good glossy magazine will trump that.

I’d avoid erotica as such. Getting a stalk and having the business end rise up and touch the cold porcelain even in your own home is not a pleasant experience.

Voodoomelon

Having been through a large house renovation over the last few years, i've come to the conclusion the sale of bogs should be regulated. Never mind the insurance scandal, surely the bigger crime is selling bogs that would have trouble flushing a kittens sh1te let alone a hippos leg of a turd.

Wandering through the bathroom shops, there is no way to know what the flushing capability is like before buying. There should be a sticker on the cistern like you see on tyres that show the different levels of grip and noise. Something akin to a boiler rating; F rating means pisses and loose midden only. A++ rating means airline grade levels of capability, flushing aubergine sized turds with absolute ease.

The bog on my top floor which I mentioned before, the ones the builders blocked is doing my head in. I no longer hold the builders accountable for monster they left stuck in the u-bend, the toilet is the equivalent of a wheezing old man, it barely passes 10-12 sheets of bog roll, never mind a pile of tar after a night on the Guinness. Every time it flushes, the bowl fills up a third of the way and then slowly empties. Pathetic.

And the refill time is equally unimpressive, easily a four minute fill. Which is utterly unacceptable when there's guests hovering outside and you drastically need a second flush. And the most frustrating thing is, without my sticker system, there's absolutely no way to know if a replacement toilet will be any better. I think a trip to Dragons Den is in order. I've love to show Peter Jones my turd rating scale.

Roger Hassenforder

Voodoomelon wrote: »

Having been through a large house renovation over the last few years, i've come to the conclusion the sale of bogs should be regulated. Never mind the insurance scandal, surely the bigger crime is selling bogs that would have trouble flushing a kittens sh1te let alone a hippos leg of a turd.

Wandering through the bathroom shops, there is no way to know what the flushing capability is like before buying. There should be a sticker on the cistern like you see on tyres that show the different levels of grip and noise. Something akin to a boiler rating; F rating means pisses and loose midden only. A++ rating means airline grade levels of capability, flushing aubergine sized turds with absolute ease.

The bog on my top floor which I mentioned before, the ones the builders blocked is doing my head in. I no longer hold the builders accountable for monster they left stuck in the u-bend, the toilet is the equivalent of a wheezing old man, it barely passes 10-12 sheets of bog roll, never mind a pile of tar after a night on the Guinness. Every time it flushes, the bowl fills up a third of the way and then slowly empties. Pathetic.

And the refill time is equally unimpressive, easily a four minute fill. Which is utterly unacceptable when there's guests hovering outside and you drastically need a second flush. And the most frustrating thing is, without my sticker system, there's absolutely no way to know if a replacement toilet will be any better. I think a trip to Dragons Den is in order. I've love to show Peter Jones my turd rating scale.

I'd crowdfund that

Maybe an ISO standard of certification

Bullocks

JohnnyFlash wrote: »

Go for a Shanks or American Standard unit, Brendan. Stay well clear of any Italian or French made garderobe - tiny little throat on them, or even worse, the ledge. Don’t want to spend the rest of your dotage making toilet in a substandard shît closet.

I don't know if the back bench on some of them toilets is too bad to be honest. I've been occasionally using a Turkish one that has the bench and I reckon the way the turd just lands on it as opposed to "skidding" down leaves less clean up. Now the one I'm using has a great flush that picks up my little baby and carries it away faultlessly off the bench. Would you give them a trial and a second chance maybe?

Brendan Bendar

Bullocks wrote: »

I don't know if the back bench on some of them toilets is too bad to be honest. I've been occasionally using a Turkish one that has the bench and I reckon the way the turd just lands on it as opposed to "skidding" down leaves less clean up. Now the one I'm using has a great flush that picks up my little baby and carries it away faultlessly off the bench. Would you give them a trial and a second chance maybe?

There will be no bench in casa Bendar, that’s for sure.

I f I want to examine a log I’ll just adjust the AOT and drape her over the back of the rim board.

Tip of the corner of the mobile device and she’s swimming.

fuerte1976

Them benches are akin to a display board a fishmonger would use to exhibit his/her prouduce.
A complete no no.. Unless you inherit your crapper..
If you want to inspect the cargo, f... off out into the garden or lift the lid on the gully in the footpath!

EmmetSpiceland

fuerte1976 wrote: »

Them benches are akin to a display board a fishmonger would use to exhibit his/her prouduce.
A complete no no.. Unless you inherit your crapper..
If you want to inspect the cargo, f... off out into the garden or lift the lid on the gully in the footpath!

Plus you really have to “paper” down before you drop any “deuces”, otherwise you are going to be in from some stubborn streaking.

Also, the smell, when the shíte is out of the water, can be overpowering.

fuerte1976

Similar to a fishmongers dilemma!

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

fuerte1976 wrote: »

Them benches are akin to a display board a fishmonger would use to exhibit his/her prouduce.
A complete no no.. Unless you inherit your crapper..
If you want to inspect the cargo, f... off out into the garden or lift the lid on the gully in the footpath!

Plus you really have to “paper” down before you drop any “deuces”, otherwise you are going to be in from some stubborn streaking.

Also, the smell, when the shíte is out of the water, can be overpowering.

EmmetSpiceland

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

Plus you really have to “paper” down before you drop any “deuces”, otherwise you are going to be in from some stubborn streaking.

Also, the smell, when the shíte is out of the water, can be overpowering.

Can't say I've ever been bothered by streaking myself E. None of us are above scrubbing loos. It's the brush I struggle with.

What's to be done with a soiled toilet-brush? Ideally, you'd rinse it mid-flush -- that's fine, but not always practical. Too often, I've had to return a - frankly disgusting - toilet-brush to its placeholder, daubing my innards all over its receptacle - as a challenge for Kristina or Natalia to resolve, next morning.

"Leave this cubicle as you would wish to find it!" the sign exhorts.
I wish I could Kristina, I wish I could.

EmmetSpiceland

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

Can't say I've ever been bothered by streaking myself E. None of us are above scrubbing loos. It's the brush I struggle with.

What's to be done with a soiled toilet-brush? Ideally, you'd rinse it mid-flush -- that's fine, but not always practical. Too often, I've had to return a - frankly disgusting - toilet-brush to its placeholder, daubing my innards all over its receptacle - as a challenge for Kristina or Natalia to resolve, next morning.

"Leave this cubicle as you would wish to find it!" the sign exhorts.
I wish I could Kristina, I wish I could.

Streaks bother me, ATNM, and the “shelf” streaks are particularly bad. But you’re not wrong. The brush is a vile utensil.

A necessary evil. But an unwelcome one. How much of a “wash” can the head get from a dunk in the flush?

Also, if it’s been a particularly heavy “load” you’re looking at getting a lot of paper “bits” stuck in the bristles.

As for the brush “holder”...well, that doesn’t bear thinking about.

It’s equally as grim when you’re in someone else’s house but they don’t have a brush so you have to resort to “twisting” bog roll into makeshift “crud” removers.

Slideways

The blockade has been lifted. A great relief to be honest. Slippery wee divils about the size of a mars bar and lots of them

Sounded like the baggage carousel in Dublin’s international terminal. One after another dropping into the water.

One Wroe I made is that I had bleached earlier this morning and got a touch of Neptune’s kiss. Hope it doesn’t cause any bleaching to the tea towel holder

gozunda

Roger Hassenforder wrote: »

I'd crowdfund that

Maybe an ISO standard of certification

Investment opportunities? Fund a remake of a classic?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNJkdHapTiE

Hector Savage

Slideways wrote: »

The blockade has been lifted. A great relief to be honest. Slippery wee divils about the size of a mars bar and lots of them

Sounded like the baggage carousel in Dublin’s international terminal. One after another dropping into the water.

One Wroe I made is that I had bleached earlier this morning and got a touch of Neptune’s kiss. Hope it doesn’t cause any bleaching to the tea towel holder

bleached ?

JohnnyFlash

Slideways wrote: »

The blockade has been lifted. A great relief to be honest. Slippery wee divils about the size of a mars bar and lots of them

Sounded like the baggage carousel in Dublin’s international terminal. One after another dropping into the water.

One Wroe I made is that I had bleached earlier this morning and got a touch of Neptune’s kiss. Hope it doesn’t cause any bleaching to the tea towel holder

You don’t strike me as a good humoured sort at the best of times, but I’d say the mood has lifted somewhat?

Slideways

Ah JF, I wouldn’t say I was bad humoured, have an inability to suffer fools mostly.

Indeed you are right though, mood has considerably lightened as has the load on my legs. Must have been 2kg if midden dropped off

Utter Consternation

Slideways wrote: »

Ah JF, I wouldn’t say I was bad humoured, have an inability to suffer fools mostly.

Indeed you are right though, mood has considerably lightened as has the load on my legs. Must have been 2kg if midden dropped off

Excellent news, Slideways. My thoughts and prayers were with you.

Glad you pulled through.

JohnnyFlash

Slideways wrote: »

Ah JF, I wouldn’t say I was bad humoured, have an inability to suffer fools mostly.

Indeed you are right though, mood has considerably lightened as has the load on my legs. Must have been 2kg if midden dropped off

Dropped a couple of weight divisions as it’s known in boxing circles.

Hector Savage

Just had a few morning coffees and must have dropped about 3KG of scuther - feel f*cken great now!!!
light as a feather!

Bullocks

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

Can't say I've ever been bothered by streaking myself E. None of us are above scrubbing loos. It's the brush I struggle with.

What's to be done with a soiled toilet-brush? Ideally, you'd rinse it mid-flush -- that's fine, but not always practical. Too often, I've had to return a - frankly disgusting - toilet-brush to its placeholder, daubing my innards all over its receptacle - as a challenge for Kristina or Natalia to resolve, next morning.

"Leave this cubicle as you would wish to find it!" the sign exhorts.
I wish I could Kristina, I wish I could.

It’s equally as grim when you’re in someone else’s house but they don’t have a brush so you have to resort to “twisting” bog roll into makeshift “crud” removers.

If you're in someone else's house and the animals don't bother their arse to supply a toilet brush why would you go to the trouble of sticking your paw full of tissue into their cesspit? Even if they are your skid marks - feck them. I'd consider it atrocious hospitality on their behalf and should nearly be rewarded with skiddies!

Bullocks

To keep the toilet brush in reasonable nick we put about a cup of Zoflora into the toilet brush holder every now and then. Of course it's not immaculate but it smells "linen fresh"
To get rid of clumps of tissue I let the cistern fill again and flush while holding the brush in the toilet and plunge it around to lose most of the stuff.

padd b1975

Bullocks wrote: »

If you're in someone else's house and the animals don't bother their arse to supply a toilet brush why would you go to the trouble of sticking your paw full of tissue into their cesspit? Even if they are your skid marks - feck them. I'd consider it atrocious hospitality on their behalf and should nearly be rewarded with skiddies!

Improvise.

There's bound to be a toothbrush or a face cloth knocking around.

Hector Savage

Bullocks wrote: »

To keep the toilet brush in reasonable nick we put about a cup of Zoflora into the toilet brush holder every now and then. Of course it's not immaculate but it smells "linen fresh"
To get rid of clumps of tissue I let the cistern fill again and flush while holding the brush in the toilet and plunge it around to lose most of the stuff.

As said they are vile things, but never never never use a toilet brush if there is any paper.
Flush untill all paper is gone, then use the brush for any remaining skid....

Andreas77

Polypropylene bristles can launch debris from the head of the toilet brush onto surrounding objects such as walls, shoes, trousers, or into hard to clean areas like the back of the seat or the the underside of the tank, and also into the grouting between tiles where it will brown up the sealing joints.Whether the debris is ejected on insertion of the brush into its basin or on withdrawal depends largely on the tendency of the bristles (which are typically cross cylindrical) to point slightly upwards, or slightly downwards, and of course the age of the bristles. It is not without irony that a brand new toilet brush fresh from the department store is much more likely to fling debris about the room on its first two hundred uses, than a decrepit and fouled up brush which could have an age in excess of five years. The older brush is not without issues either, obviously.

gerrybbadd

Andreas77 wrote: »

Polypropylene bristles can launch debris from the head of the toilet brush onto surrounding objects such as walls, shoes, trousers, or into hard to clean areas like the back of the seat or the the underside of the tank, and also into the grouting between tiles where it will brown up the sealing joints.Whether the debris is ejected on insertion of the brush into its basin or on withdrawal depends largely on the tendency of the bristles (which are typically cross cylindrical) to point slightly upwards, or slightly downwards, and of course the age of the bristles. It is not without irony that a brand new toilet brush fresh from the department store is much more likely to fling debris about the room on its first two hundred uses, than a decrepit and fouled up brush which could have an age in excess of five years. The older brush is not without issues either, obviously.

Good jesus, what a first post - knowledgable, informative and entertaining.

You're most welcome A

Hector Savage

IIGeminiII wrote: »

Hi. This will be my last post on this topic as I feel I am being misunderstood.

Firstly, I only left a full potty beside the bed once. I did this because I was drunk. That was why I posted the original 'anecdote'. I agree it may have been a bit horrible for her but I was inebriated.

Secondly. Leaving poo in the rubbish bag overnight seems weird when you can simply flush it from the premises.

On reflection I've decided I'm not going to bring it to work as yes, maybe that is a bit strange.

Lastly our bathroom is minuscule. Almost criminally small. Getting in and out without any potty on the floor is already difficult as the door clips the toilet basin.

I'll just stop doing this at home until the situation is fixed. Goodnight.

I know this was supposed to be your last post on this, but any updates ??

partyguinness

Feck it. Running around all day like a headless chicken and just about had time to drop a few anchors but not paying attention and in my haste inadvertently smeared a daub of midden on my index finger. Under the nail as well- got right in there.

Cue my finger has been scrubbed raw and feels a lot different to the rest of my fingers. Making sure not to chew on my nail until I get the scissors to it later.

gerrybbadd

partyguinness wrote: »

Feck it. Running around all day like a headless chicken and just about had time to drop a few anchors but not paying attention and in my haste inadvertently smeared a daub of midden on my index finger. Under the nail as well- got right in there.

Cue my finger has been scrubbed raw and feels a lot different to the rest of my fingers. Making sure not to chew on my nail until I get the scissors to it later.

I'd reccomend avoidance of nostril picking as well. Could end up with a terrible surprise

sligojoek

partyguinness wrote: »

Feck it. Running around all day like a headless chicken and just about had time to drop a few anchors but not paying attention and in my haste inadvertently smeared a daub of midden on my index finger. Under the nail as well- got right in there.

Cue my finger has been scrubbed raw and feels a lot different to the rest of my fingers. Making sure not to chew on my nail until I get the scissors to it later.

Wire brush and Dettol

Hector Savage

partyguinness wrote: »

Feck it. Running around all day like a headless chicken and just about had time to drop a few anchors but not paying attention and in my haste inadvertently smeared a daub of midden on my index finger. Under the nail as well- got right in there.

Cue my finger has been scrubbed raw and feels a lot different to the rest of my fingers. Making sure not to chew on my nail until I get the scissors to it later.

ara jaysus!