Out sick in probationary period

Plumbthedepths

WinnyThePoo wrote:

Wow that's a horrible contribution.

Your opinion but it may also be sound advice considering the OPs behaviour as outlined by herself.

tatsplat

iamwhoiam wrote: »

spockety wrote: »

This is true, and while it wasn't my response I'll just pick up on something.

In a wider sense, the OP finds herself in this position because there are too many old fashioned views, old fashioned companies, and old fashioned bosses still out there who cannot for the life of them see the link between the health and satisfaction of their employees, and the health of their business. It is crazy that people are scared to get sick, stressed about the work implications of major issues at home etc. Progressive companies, and progressive leaders handle this kind of stuff with ease, and if they were more widespread then people wouldn't have the kind of worries that puts them in these situations.

We also must consider that their are employees that take the piss . I am a woman and had three kids and worked
I was lucky to have a support system and am aware not all do
But imagine a place of employment where many have kids and some take the piss calling in sick when kids have a cold

If he just had a cold it wouldn't be an issue leaving him but he hasn't eaten for 36 hours without puking, he is on antibiotics now and pessaries for the fever but we are monitoring him for signs of dehydration in case we need to take him to hospital.

tatsplat

Plumbthedepths wrote: »

WinnyThePoo wrote:

Wow that's a horrible contribution.

Your opinion but it may also be sound advice considering the OPs behaviour as outlined by herself.

Don't have kids do you? You're also a man I'm guessing

Plumbthedepths

tatsplat wrote:

Don't have kids do you? You're also a man I'm guessing

I have two kids, when I need time off I'm honest with my employer as is my partner with their employer. No issues ever . My gender is irrelevant, honesty/ integrity is what's important to an employer.

WinnyThePoo

Plumbthedepths wrote: »

WinnyThePoo wrote:

Wow that's a horrible contribution.

Your opinion but it may also be sound advice considering the OPs behaviour as outlined by herself.

She made a mistake in a stressful situation. I'm sure your perfect in every way.
Cop on.

Plumbthedepths

WinnyThePoo wrote:

She made a mistake in a stressful situation. I'm sure your perfect in every way. Cop on.

Not engaging in personal attack.

tatsplat

Plumbthedepths wrote: »

tatsplat wrote:

Don't have kids do you? You're also a man I'm guessing

I have two kids, when I need time off I'm honest with my employer as is my partner with their employer. No issues ever . My gender is irrelevant, honesty/ integrity is what's important to an employer.

Well, comprehension of a family emergency and support to a working mother is important to me as an employee. I'm not trying to manipulate anybody, I got an earful when I said I was going to be out to care for my sick toddler - the truth - and I thought a doctors note would protect me in the circumstances. Not like I'm going to be paid, I just don't have much other choice. The kid is under the age of 2, it's not just a sniffle and my parents are both dead so I can't drop him at my mums or something like that.

WinnyThePoo

Hopefully the op does the same in relation to you.

spockety

iamwhoiam wrote: »

We also must consider that their are employees that take the piss . I am a woman and had three kids and worked
I was lucky to have a support system and am aware not all do
But imagine a place of employment where many have kids and some take the piss calling in sick when kids have a cold

In my experience the type of people who take the piss calling in sick are also the type of people who also let you down in other ways that are easy to spot. Performance management, disciplinary procedures etc all come into play for those people. A good employee who's work and performance is to the required standard is going to be trusted in situations where they call in sick. Similarly, someone who just started should be given the benefit of the doubt with no stain on their record. If they are not to be trusted and their work ends up being poor, it will wash out.

spockety

tatsplat wrote: »

Well, comprehension of a family emergency and support to a working mother is important to me as an employee. I'm not trying to manipulate anybody, I got an earful when I said I was going to be out to care for my sick toddler - the truth - and I thought a doctors note would protect me in the circumstances. Not like I'm going to be paid, I just don't have much other choice. The kid is under the age of 2, it's not just a sniffle and my parents are both dead so I can't drop him at my mums or something like that.

You have my sympathy.

I'm still curious though about what exactly your boss said when you started talking about the gastric flu doctor's note...

Plumbthedepths

tatsplat wrote:

Well, comprehension of a family emergency and support to a working mother is important to me as an employee. I'm not trying to manipulate anybody, I got an earful when I said I was going to be out to care for my sick toddler - the truth - and I thought a doctors note would protect me in the circumstances. Not like I'm going to be paid, I just don't have much other choice. The kid is under the age of 2, it's not just a sniffle and my parents are both dead so I can't drop him at my mums or something like that.

You stated why you would be absent, you then presented a sick cert for yourself showing what is dishonesty in my opinion and considering your employer's reaction possibly theirs too. Many companies don't pay sick leave, my partner's doesn't but it is no excuse to be dishonest about an absence. I'll stand over my advice I offered earlier, it maybe wise to update your CV as your employer may now consider termination and since it may occur during a probation period no reason is necessary other than to say you are not working out.

Plumbthedepths

WinnyThePoo wrote:

Hopefully the op does the same in relation to you.

Replying to what is posted and pointing out as to why an employer and therefore the employee may have a problem is not a personal attack whereas your posting style and comments are.

jester77

iamwhoiam wrote: »

We also must consider that their are employees that take the piss . I am a woman and had three kids and worked
I was lucky to have a support system and am aware not all do
But imagine a place of employment where many have kids and some take the piss calling in sick when kids have a cold

Are you just going to send your kids to school if they are sick and spread the virus?

I'm glad I live in a country that have the foresight to offer help when you have sick kids. I get 25 days paid off per year, by law, to take care of my children if they are sick. My partner also gets 25. I just have to provide a sick cert from the doctor.

WinnyThePoo

Woefully inept advice from plumb as not worth heeding.

OP, you need to be honest with your employer. Explain the mistake and the stress you where under at the time.

You need to show honesty now, its not the end of the world.

AmberGold

Wouldn't worry too much about it.

You sound like a conscientious person, get back to work when he's better and finish out your probation. If it doesn't work out there are lots of jobs out there. Keep a look out for a role in a company that has a more progressive attitude to working mothers.

Boss sounds like a twat, people get sick and staff go sick.

Kimbot

AmberGold wrote: »

Boss sounds like a twat, people get sick and staff go sick.

Nobody here is disagreeing with that however dishonesty plays a big part.
OP rang in and told their employer they had to mind their sick child which is grand, however returning to work with a cert to say that the OP was actually sick instead is wrong.

The OP wasnt sick, their child was!

iamwhoiam

tatsplat wrote: »

If he just had a cold it wouldn't be an issue leaving him but he hasn't eaten for 36 hours without puking, he is on antibiotics now and pessaries for the fever but we are monitoring him for signs of dehydration in case we need to take him to hospital.

I wasn't talking about your case . I was speaking in general
Your child is sick I get that . Some will take the piss

iamwhoiam

jester77 wrote: »

Are you just going to send your kids to school if they are sick and spread the virus?

I'm glad I live in a country that have the foresight to offer help when you have sick kids. I get 25 days paid off per year, by law, to take care of my children if they are sick. My partner also gets 25. I just have to provide a sick cert from the doctor.

I am not the employer here . There are Force Majure days a available and in my opinion could have been used by the OP s husband ?

And if we are all honest we would know that given 25 days to take when a child id sick will be abused by some .

SusieBlue

Its not beyond the realms of possibility that the child passed the illness onto OP, for all the employer knows they were both sick.

Its very common for illnesses like that to get passed around families. The child was sick when she rang that morning, & she came down with a dose herself by afternoon.
Not unreasonable or unbelievable.
The sick cert doesn't prove her to be a liar or untrustworthy whatsoever.

OP hasnt posted in personal problems forum, theyve posted in work problems forum


sympathies and internet fist-waving at the orrible boss are misplaced and attacking posters setting out the actual realities is way out of line imo

taking a bank of time off early in probation because you dont have anyone else to cover for a childs illness isnt going to go in your favour.

thats not a judgement of you as an employee nor your boss as an employer, its a reflection of the limitations put upon employers to make these calls after probation, hence the best practice approach of coming down hard and decisively on anyone still in probation.

anyone advising you that youre entitled to take this off might be correct but if they follow that advice by telling you the employer isnt allowed take it into account they are giving you terrible information

Ash.J.Williams

The gastrio flu bit was a mistake

tatsplat

Deleted User wrote: »

OP hasnt posted in personal problems forum, theyve posted in work problems forum


sympathies and internet fist-waving at the orrible boss are misplaced and attacking posters setting out the actual realities is way out of line imo

taking a bank of time off early in probation because you dont have anyone else to cover for a childs illness isnt going to go in your favour.

thats not a judgement of you as an employee nor your boss as an employer, its a reflection of the limitations put upon employers to make these calls after probation, hence the best practice approach of coming down hard and decisively on anyone still in probation.

anyone advising you that youre entitled to take this off might be correct but if they follow that advice by telling you the employer isnt allowed take it into account they are giving you terrible information

I actually agree with you and I'm thinking that maybe given our circumstances the job isn't suitable as it appears they don't have the cover available if a staff member is out sick or has a genuine reason for not being able to work. However since we are in the process of getting a mortgage I'm worried that the repercussions will be immediate, I'd like to try and make it work until we draw down on what we have been pre approved for since we are already sale agreed on a property. In every other area my performance has been optimal and my boss even told me this over the phone.

tatsplat

Might add that stressing over the situation plus midnight visit to emergency doctor and lack of sleep with vomiting baby has given me a migraine anyway

Alchemy_

OP I'm on probation and only in my place 7 weeks, I've hurt my neck and can barely hold it up (it happened me last year and lasted about 3 days so I was trying to tough it out with painkillers and creams and heatpads) but it got so painful in work yesterday that I just couldn't continue, spoke to my boss told her I was very conscious of not wanting to take sick leave and could I possibly apply for annual leave the following day.

She couldn't of been nicer, told me not to even worry or stress about sick leave or probation she even tried to get me to take a half day yesterday too to rest, approved my annual leave for today and told me just to text her tomorrow morning if it's still bad and that the main thing is that I get myself better, the work will all still be there next week.

I'm sorry you've landed in this position it's an awful feeling worrying about it and knowing your boss isn't too happy but what can you do, your child was sick and there was nobody to mind him. I know every workplace is different but I'm surprised they weren't more understanding when it's a sick child.

Have a word with your boss when you go back and just let them know you're going to work twice as hard to make up for the lost days. If he knows or confronts you about the sick note being for you either explain the whole situation to him if you think he'll be sympathetic or reasonable, or just say you caught a bug off the child.

Good luck and don't stress too much, most likely it will all be ok. Hope the child feels better soon.

GalwayGrrrrrl

killanena wrote: »

There is parental leave for situations like your child being sick etc but while on probation you can be let go for any reason they see fit really.

Mind you child and focus on helping them get better, worry about the job after.

My condolences, horrible position to find yourself in andi hope the little one feels better soon.

Parental leave must be booked in advance so can’t be used for unplanned sickness.

My sympathies to the OP, I was in similar position when my son was small. Luckily my boss let me use annual leave at short notice when child was sick.
Getting a doctor to lie for you wasn’t a smart move- I’d rather have an honest employee than one that encourages healthcare professionals to lie for them tbh.

MrMusician18

spockety wrote: »

If someone new joined my team and after a few weeks told me they had to stay home with their kid who had severe tonsillitis, I'd say "Jesus, sorry to hear that, hope he's ok. Don't worry about it, go and take care of him and we'll see you when you get back.". I hope I'm never the type of d***head who makes an employee feel nervous or stressed about home situations like that.

It might be different in different industries, but in mine it's an employees market. If you find someone really good, you want to keep them. You want them to think "Wow this is a great place to work". Treating employees well is paid back in spades, in my experience.

The other side of that coin is that the employee is just in the door and they're is no real relationship built and the trust that this is a genuine required absence is not there.

We don't know what the OP does, so the absence may have caused real difficulty for the employer - which might go some way to explaining the reaction.

In any case, this particular employer doesn't appear to be family friendly. I'd probably be thinking about my exit strategy now tbh.

Lillianna Microscopic Gnu

Lillianna Microscopic Gnu wrote: »

It appears you're not out. Have they shown to their boss they can't be trusted? People in this thread are not their boss.

Sickness IS terrible misconduct according to many.

And the boss doesn't know about the dishonesty so that's moot.

Read the OP again please. She rang to say her child was sick then got a cert to say that SHE was sick.

skallywag

tatsplat wrote: »

Don't have kids do you? You're also a man I'm guessing

OP, I sympathize with your situation, but you are doing yourself no favours whatsoever by taking such an attitude.

You have my sympathy as I know what it is like to have a sick child. That said, different companies can take radically different approaches to a child being sick. Some will be understanding and will try to help as much as possible while others either will not. In your situation it was clear that a sick child was going to be a big deal due to your circumstances, and it would have been something which I would have brought up an interview, i.e. what happens in the event that my child gets sick, can I then either take time off, work from home etc. It's a very common question that gets asked at interview and I would advise to you do so in the future.

The sick cert topic though was a mistake in my opinion. Why were you not just honest with your employer? A lot of employers I know would actually be more sympathetic towards a sick child than the employee themselves being sick!

Gimme A Pound

Plumbthedepths wrote: »

An employer being right is not the same as an employer being great. Childish response tbh .

The employer is not right to view sick leave or leave to take care of a sick child as misconduct. Particularly when the odious individual doesn't pay for those.

Plumbthedepths wrote: »

Not engaging in personal attack.

It was hardly a personal attack.