Help help! Neighbor ruining my life

Cezary88

I'm writing here cause I'm pretty desperate at this stage, I've rented a house about a year ago, the neighbourgh is friend with the landlord which is away in the country. The deal was if I won't make noise I'll be fine.

Quickly I found my neighbor is looking into my windows and steps out into his garden as soon as my backdoor opens, we live in semi-detached house. It started from him coming to my door saying it was too loud the night before because I watched a movie "too loud" after 10'clock, fair enough I putted on home cinema when i moved in I didnt realize the walls are so thin I haven't turned it on since.
Since then he's been telling me I either comply or he will have to talk to the landlord and I will have to leave. (There's no houses in area for rent I'm only an apprentice and I coparent a child every Wednesday and every weekend) so I did my best to not cross him as I need the house with the garden

After a year it came down to the fact I lifted the fence cause of his complaint about my dog barking at people passing by (while his 2little dogs never stop barking-he complaint about me making noise raising the fence anyway), I leave my dog out for not longer then 5 min. Not one of my friends set a foot in my door EVER and I mean I never invited anyone into the house. I don't play music at home at all (unless its daytime then sometimes quietly) i have my blinds constantly down. I dont go out the back unless his car is not at the house because he's watching me. I've been still harassed multiple times over making noise like when I would go out with my partner and come back home and I barely even go out...(twice I played music at the start when i moved in on one of the lowest settings on the TV being extremely vigilant) and after second time where he came to my door and he lied straight to my face he rang the door 5times and been knocking for half hour trying to make an idiot out of me which I even was stupid enough to not argue with him and took it being talked down like to a dog. I feel like I can't normally live in my house, my partner putted on music last year in the kitchen when cooking during day and he was straight to my door cause he works long he comes back home and works in the kitchen of his laptop so he needs to focus. that time he invited me into his house to have a talk with me and explain me how he works (He works crazy hours) he lives with wife and daughter, him and his WiFi are just living together.
He would complain literally about anything, my dog barking for an hour (10min) talking too loud too late etc and everytime he would harass me if it will happen again I will have to leave and even if he wouldn't have anything to complain about he would call me over when he would saw me to tell me he's happy with me and ask loads of questions being nosy.

Matter of fact he never called the gardaas because he knows it was never loud
i think I would actually love him to do so because I rather speak with them then receive harassment from him but he knows they would think its a joke if they would come over

2months ago I told him its my partners birthday and I told him it might be loud untill 10o clock he told me he will tolerate till 9pm So we left to pub at 9pm in my house that time there was only me, my partner and her younger brother a very quiet lad we came back home after pub my misses went to sleep and I stayed for a while longer talking with her brother.
Couple days later I received phone call from my landlord telling me off, to be honest it sounded more like my landlord wouldnt want to deal with his harassment while having no problem with me, he was agreeing with me at the same time he is oversensitive and asked me to try to keep him happy,

I've been avoiding my neighbourgh since not once and I mean not once made a slightest noise and i havent seen him since
Untill today he came up to me complaining about me having sex too loud with my partner at night and in the morning telling me I will have to do Smth or I will have to go.
I told him there was no noise and walked away ignoring him completely.
I informed of that my landlord saying I will not tolerate that and that its none of his concern am I intimate with my partner or not and that to my knowledge nowhere in rent agreement there's anything about me not being able to have sex with someone at night or early morning.

I'm absolutely sickened with the situation I feel harassed and walking on eggshells in my house.
I've a nice garden I can't use blinds I can't open dog I can't leave outside it came to a point I'm having anxiety over him

On the end I will add I have very good references from 3 previous houses I've been renting in the past 5 years. Not one complaint ever...

Is there anything I can do? I feel like a dog thats being cornered and poked with a stick.

Please help

P.s. I don't know is it the right category to host this post, if not sorry for inconvenience

Marcusm

Log it and report it to gardai as harrassment. Sounds like your landlord knows he’s a pain the arse. After you log it with gardai, inform them the next time he approaches you and suggest that they speak with him. This will either end the harrassment or escalate it.

Cezary88

Thats the thing, I can't risk escalating it, I'll have nowhere to go, gardaas could send me to solicitors they might not want to bother with it. But I suposse it at least would give me some sort of record

Edit:
I know him enough to tell it would escalate it, he is like a sheriff on the estate, gossiping and telling off everyone around. Hes a man with big ego its either his way or no way. A prick to be honest...

jimmycrackcorm

It's astonishing if your neighbour could actually hear you having sex.

Surely the opposite must be true, can you hear your neighbour?

Anyway your landlird cannot evict youb except on valid grounds. Just live your life add normal, keep a record of your neighbors actions and report to the guards any harassment. This will help in the event your landlord tries Ann illegal eviction

If you're renting over a year do you not have rights to protect your tenancy?

So the landlord can't just toss you out, even if he wanted to?

I'd tell the neighbour where to go and I'd make a point of completely ignoring him. Play music, TV etc and live your life. Feck the neighbour. You'll never please him.

inajock

Tell him to fcuk off away from you and find a better way to put his day in,also tell him your there a year and a day now and the landlord can't shift you on. Life's too short to be intimidated by the likes of that.make all the noise you want. The likes of that always burn out quickly.

inajock

If he's not fit to live in a housing estate he shouldn't have bought in one.

Interested Observer

Tell him to get ****ed and that if you see his face again you'll be reporting him to the Gardai for harassing you. The landlord can't just turf you out. The guy is a bully, the only thing he'll understand is if you push back.

Diemos

You need to ask yourself is the house worth the heartache.
Sounds like this guy is just a bully.
From what you are saying you sound like you have been very accommodating with this guy.
I would go full nuclear on him, at this stage.

Best of luck.

ted1

You realistically can’t be kicked out in Ireland. Di t worry about that part.
Just tell the neighbour to feck off

Shefwedfan

Ring the landlord, tell him the neighbour is making your life a misery. I would expect you have another neighbour? Someone else on street? Get talking to them so they can back up your good beghavior

Explain the situation and ask if they would provide a reference. If the guy is been a dick to you then he is probably to everyone else

is_that_so

Cezary88 wrote: »

Thats the thing, I can't risk escalating it, I'll have nowhere to go, gardaas could send me to solicitors they might not want to bother with it. But I suposse it at least would give me some sort of record

Edit:
I know him enough to tell it would escalate it, he is like a sheriff on the estate, gossiping and telling off everyone around. Hes a man with big ego its either his way or no way. A prick to be honest...

You need to decide what you're really prepared to do here. For now you seem to be speculating and anticipating the worst outcome. I would go to the Gardai anyway, if nothing else just for a chat about all of it. The man sounds like a bully and is banking on people just putting their heads down and pretending nothing is going on. There may well be others in the estate who have experienced his behaviour. My only suggestion really is to formulate a standard but polite response to any of his claims.

dudara

Unfortunately, you’ve allowed him to back you into a corner by allowing him to dominate you for the past year. You need to change the dynamic of the relationship.

You have tenancy rights, so you have a certain level of protection. Your landlord can only ask you to leave for a certain number of reasons, or because you’ve breached your lease.

First, give your landlord a heads up that you’ve had enough if this guy and that you will be living normally. He’ll probably get grief from the neighbour so it’s only fair to give him a heads up.

Then start doing things normally. When he comes around, defend yourself and then log the interaction (date/time/topic) in a notebook. If you need to escalate to the Gardaí, you’ll have some evidence.

Dial Hard

I wouldn't be going nuclear on him. Speak to your landlord, explain the situation clearly, say that you've been more than accommodating of this guy's eccentricities for over a year now but that you can no longer put his demands above your own right to peaceful enjoyment of the house. Explain that you will be doing nothing more than living normally, but that you suspect the neighbour will not react well and you are just giving him a friendly heads-up. I suspect the LL knows well that yer man is a pain in the arse and will just ignore him.

Secondly, next time yer man kicks off about something, just tell him coolly and calmly that you are simply enjoying your house as you are entitled to, that you've already spoken to your landlord and that you will no longer be engaging with him on such matters. Wish him a good day and get on with your life.

If he keeps up or escalates his nonsense, keep a record of everything and have a friendly word with the local neighbourhood garda.

wellwhynot

You are letting this guy ruin your enjoyment of your home. Put a stop to it today. Play your music, use your garden and if he calls to the door tell him you have a right to privacy in your own home and his behaviour is harassment. Keep a log of all of his ridiculous complaints and go to the gardai so you have it on record.

ontheditch2

What all the posters are saying, while probably confrontational, it is the only way to go.
You have to be able to live your life and sound very reasonable in your dealings with the neighbour.
Take note of everything, bring to the Gardai and show them. They will then have a record of three complaint. If the LL tries to evict you, you have evidence to say the treatment you received.

Personally, I'd just ignore his very existence, ignore him on the street, if he comes to the door to complain, open the door, look him in the face and close the door again.

People will walk all over you in life if you let them, one bite back could sort out the whole lot.
I hope it all works out for you

Big Nasty

jimmycrackcorm wrote: »

It's astonishing if your neighbour could actually hear you having sex.

Maybe she's a screamer! :eek:

dennyk

Big Nasty wrote: »

Maybe she's a screamer! :eek:

No need to be sexist; maybe he's a screamer too... :pac:

Shefwedfan

If you are unwilling to stand up to the neighbour then move.A house is a house at the end of the day

Ring the landlord, tell him you will have to look for an alternative due to the issues with the neighbour. You cannot continue to live with the stress. If he is unwilling to do anything about it then move out

corks finest

Get a camera with audio up,buy stereo headphones for TV after 10 o C( I bought some as our walks are thin/ my kid goes to bed at 10) keep note if all this harrasement,record his dogs barking/ report to landlord

Graces7

Shefwedfan wrote: »

If you are unwilling to stand up to the neighbour then move.A house is a house at the end of the day

Ring the landlord, tell him you will have to look for an alternative due to the issues with the neighbour. You cannot continue to live with the stress. If he is unwilling to do anything about it then move out

Wondering if this is the first time he has behaved like this? we never know who rented a place before us and why they left. Maybe the ll is fed up of losing tenants to his antics and trying to make you conform.

and look round for another house. Keep looking.

Cezary88

Graces7 wrote: »

Wondering if this is the first time he has behaved like this? we never know who rented a place before us and why they left. Maybe the ll is fed up of losing tenants to his antics and trying to make you conform.

and look round for another house. Keep looking.

I heard he has made people leave out of that house, I believe he solely regrets buying a house in an estate. I heard him giving out about dogs barking, running loose even ringing the gardaas over a barbeque across the road that continued into nightime

[Deleted User] wrote: »

So the landlord can't just toss you out, even if he wanted to?.

I don't know anything about my rights, I never got another rent agreement after the last one expired.

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I'd tell the neighbour where to go and I'd make a point of completely ignoring him. Play music, TV etc and live your life. Feck the neighbour. You'll never please him.

Well yes I had enough at this stage to a point that if I will have to move out then so be it.

[Deleted User] wrote: »

If you're renting over a year do you not have rights to protect your tenancy?
.

Do I?

Shefwedfan wrote: »

Ring the landlord, tell him the neighbour is making your life a misery. I would expect you have another neighbour? Someone else on street? Get talking to them so they can back up your good beghavior

Explain the situation and ask if they would provide a reference. If the guy is been a dick to you then he is probably to everyone else

last time I spoke with landlord he sounded very soft and he knew my neighbor was the problem.
I texted the landlord what happened and that its not alright with me harassing me over being intimate with my partner at night, somehow he never had a problem and I live there a year, he is just a bully.

As for neighbors I live on a corner he's my only neighbourgh, not counting in the ones across the road.

chicorytip

Some people can be hypersensitive to noises the rest of us would consider tolerable such as dogs barking, children playing, traffic or music being played. It tends to be people suffering from stress or anxiety who are affected in this way so this could be the case with your neighbour but that would be his problem entirely and he would need professional help to deal with it. You are fully entitled to live a full life and behave as you wish in your own home subject to the societal norms and laws that we all must abide by. What you have described is nothing short of being the victim of an extended period of intimidation and harassment which can be classed as criminal behaviour and nothing less. So, I think you should fight fire with fire and speak to a solicitor about the matter to determine what course of legal action would be available to you that could act as a deterrent to your tormentor. I wish you all the best for the future.

Cezary88

chicorytip wrote: »

Some people can be hypersensitive to noises the rest of us would consider tolerable such as dogs barking, children playing, traffic or music being played. It tends to be people suffering from stress or anxiety who are affected in this way so this could be the case with your neighbour but that would be his problem entirely and he would need professional help to deal with it. You are fully entitled to live a full life and behave as you wish in your own home subject to the societal norms and laws that we all must abide by. What you have described is nothing short of being the victim of an extended period of intimidation and harassment which can be classed as criminal behaviour and nothing less. So, I think you should fight fire with fire and speak to a solicitor about the matter to determine what course of legal action would be available to you that could act as a deterrent to your tormentor. I wish you all the best for the future.

I honestly believe that might be my course of action.

tvjunki

For all you know the landlord could have lived in the house and the neighbour is jealous that the landlord moved out and rented the house out.

Your lovely neighbour could have brought your landlord to court for conpensation due to tenants living normally. Once the neighbour is sensitive to noise he will hear everything. Do you hear noise from the neighbours side apart from the dogs? What about the other members of the family. Do you hear from them?

The landlord is between a rock and a hard place. Sensitive neighbour is making your life a misery. How can the landlord keep you happy and the nosy neighbour happy?
When you talk to your landlord explain what has just happened and that this is not normal behaviour. Check rtb website and type in the address. Not all cases appear.

Keep a diary of all your conversations and events that happen with this neighbour.
Ask your landlord what to do.

Speak to the guards and get a log number as this is harassment. Ask them what to do? You could sue the neighbour for harrisment but you need evidence.

You cannot bring a case against the neighbour in rtb but your neighbour can bring a case against the landlord..crazy!

Don't envy your situation or your landlords situation.

April 73

OP- you have a lot of rights as a tenant in Ireland. Not signing another lease after 1 year doesn’t matter. The landlord is very limited in the reasons why he could evict you. I’m guessing the neighbour is not as friendly with the landlord as he says he is. If you want read up on your rights look here: www.rtb.ie

I’m with the other posters. Your neighbour is a pain & nobody living in that house will be able to please him. Make a decision today to stop letting him mess with your head. Refuse to engage with him again, keep notes on dates & what he says if he harasses you & tell him if he continues you will talk to the Gardai if necessary.

Lumen

If I was the landlord I'd be quite assertive with the neighbour to leave my tenants alone.

You are his income stream. The neighbour is likely nobody to him.

tvjunki

Lumen wrote: »

If I was the landlord I'd be quite assertive with the neighbour to leave my tenants alone.

You are his income stream. The neighbour is likely nobody to him.

The lovely neighbour could bring the landlord to rtb due to what he thinks is antisocial behaviour. He could make up examples of events that did not happen. Trust me it does happen.
Not saying you are causing noise or disruption just keep your landlord in the loop.

Shefwedfan

tvjunki wrote: »

The lovely neighbour could bring the landlord to rtb due to what he thinks is antisocial behaviour. He could make up examples of events that did not happen. Trust me it does happen.
Not saying you are causing noise or disruption just keep your landlord in the loop.

Evidence is required

10fathoms

<MOD SNIP>

GreeBo

dudara wrote: »

Unfortunately, you’ve allowed him to back you into a corner by allowing him to dominate you for the past year. You need to change the dynamic of the relationship.

You have tenancy rights, so you have a certain level of protection. Your landlord can only ask you to leave for a certain number of reasons, or because you’ve breached your lease.

First, give your landlord a heads up that you’ve had enough if this guy and that you will be living normally. He’ll probably get grief from the neighbour so it’s only fair to give him a heads up.

Then start doing things normally. When he comes around, defend yourself and then log the interaction (date/time/topic) in a notebook. If you need to escalate to the Gardaí, you’ll have some evidence.

OP, do this.
But keep the notebook by the front door, everytime he calls over get the notebook out and starting writing down the date and time and what he is saying. Make a big show of looking at your watch to get the exact time etc.

People typically stop talking very quickly when someone else is writing it down.

I would also second the idea of letting your landlord know that you are being harassed by a neighbour, for all we know this is the reason your landlord moved out.