Monthly Godchild savings Yay or nay

aaaaaaaahhhhhh

Hey AH,
What do ppl think.


My GF was made god-mother of her friends kid two years ago, her friend has no siblings so she was first in line. They prob see each other once every two months etc(not as much like since her friend had the child).


Anyway she opened a bank account for the child and is putting 25 quid a month into it.


Shes been told(not by the child's parents) that there's no need to be doing that cos its not like your niece/nephew.


Should she continue putting in the money monthly(she puts extra in for Bdays and Xmas) or should she stop and just do the Bday/Xmas?


On one hand its only 25quid but on the other will her friend be p!$$3d that she stopped putting in the monthly amount, I think she was going to stop when the kid is 18.

banie01

I don't save that much a month for my own kid! :pac:
Would be fecked if I'd do it for a God-child, niece or nephew.

It's a ceremonial role that these days is quite meaningless apart from the christening gift IMO.

Birthday presents and Xmas while the friendship is still good.
That said, quite often especially after the 1st child, godparents and real parents can drift

MyStubbleItches

Madness in my opinion. What happens if/ when she has her own kids? 25 quid a month will be a lot to be giving to someone else’s child’s future then.

Force Carrier

What the hell is your GF thinking? Inflation!

Rawr

I'd Birthday Gifts and Christmas should be the guts of it.
I've never heard of godparents maintaining savings accounts for their god children.

It sounds more like something reserved for the realm of the kid's *actual parents*, and the GF's plan to put away savings for the kid (although really nice) might come across as an encroachment into the responsibility of the parents.

Best bet I feel is to take some of that savings cash and use it on nice stuff for the kid.

Victor

It's purely down to what the donor can afford and whether the parents will accept it.

Note that people can accept tax free gifts like this up to €3,000 per year per donor.

25 quid a month is about what you'd spend on coffee if you didn't really like coffee.

Not a big deal, but a nice sentiment. It comes to about 5k in today's terms, not going to change anyone's life.

bee06

I would say birthday and Christmas presents are plenty especially for a child not even related to her. Sure who knows if her and the mom will even be friends when the child turns 18.

Signore Fancy Pants

Its a nice idea but fcuk that.

An 18 year commitment for a non-bloodline crotch goblin?

Nah.

Id spend the €25 a month on Topic bars and be happy. I got a pack of 4 for €2 yesterday.

Thats like 10,000* Topics in 18 years.



* May not be accurate.

s7ryf3925pivug

Bonkers but not your business unless you share finances and she contributes less than you think is fair.

Dale Doback

Dale Doback wrote: »

Its a nice idea but fcuk that.

An 18 year commitment for a non-bloodline crotch goblin?

Nah.

Id spend the €25 a month on Topic bars and be happy. I got a pack of 4 for €2 yesterday.

Thats like 10,000* Topics in 18 years.



* May not be accurate.

That's minus 3,000 Topic bars when you account for inflation and the next two recessions.

I'd invest in Wagon Wheels if I were you. PM me for a contact in Dealz.

Signore Fancy Pants

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

That's minus 3,000 Topic bars when you account for inflation and the next two recessions.

I'd invest in Wagon Wheels if I were you. PM me for a contact in Dealz.

If it's a secret cache of 1990's Wagon Wheels, I'm in!

beertons

Forget the cash. Teach them things, bring them places. Money is just buying their friendship.

Victor

Dale Doback wrote: »

If it's a secret cache of 1990's Wagon Wheels, I'm in!

The might taste a bit off after about 29 years.

Fr_Dougal

Agree with the post about investing in Topic bars. Hazelnuts won’t be around forever.

Signore Fancy Pants

Fr_Dougal wrote: »

Agree with the post about investing in Topic bars. Hazelnuts won’t be around forever.

God bless you Father.

gogo

I save a massive €5 each a month for my god kids.. it will amount to approx 1.2k by the time they reach college.. I told them it was theirs to
blow on what ever they want if they make it to college/further study whatever - technically it’s theirs anyway, it’s in their accounts I opened for them when they were born. It’s feck all, I don’t notice it nor feel hard done by it. I normally slip them the odd 20 when I see them, as is required by god parents, and I see them loads before someone jumps in.

Inflation will wipe it most of it out but still a nice token to hand over when (and if) they do start college and I will have done the leg work in saving it, so essentially I won’t have to shell out on another gift. Win

s4uv3

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

25 quid a month is about what you'd spend on coffee if you didn't really like coffee.

Not a big deal, but a nice sentiment. It comes to about 5k in today's terms, not going to change anyone's life.

No recession in your house, wha!

When I was 19 I inherited 7k. It changed my life in that it bought me my first car. I was a broke student, so saving that much back then was way out of reach.

meeeeh

I don't even expect presents from god parents for our kids. As a parent I would feel uncomfortable is someone commited to 18-year direct debit for my child. 25 Euro per month can become a lot when you are paying mortgage and about 1000 euro per month for childcare for your own kids. It's a nice sentiment but I think it would be better to give them larger sum in one go when they are 18 if you have plenty of disposable income then. I would lodge whatever she feels comfortable with for birthdays and Christmas and leave it at that.

gogo

meeeeh wrote: »

I don't even expect presents from god parents for our kids. As a parent I would feel uncomfortable is someone commited to 18-year direct debit for my child. 25 Euro per month can become a lot when you are paying mortgage and about 1000 euro per month for childcare for your own kids. It's a nice sentiment but I think it would be better to give them larger sum in one go when they are 18 if you have plenty of disposable income then. I would lodge whatever she feels comfortable with for birthdays and Christmas and leave it at that.

Harder to hand over a larger sum without having it ready or accumulated, don’t even notice the dd @ €5 but ..... I also wouldn’t commit to 25pm for someone else’s kid.

Alf Veedersane

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

It comes to about 5k in today's terms, not going to change anyone's life.

I found a fiver in my pocket today. Did a lap of honour round the office.

gogo

Alf Veedersane wrote: »

I found a fiver in my pocket today. Did a lap of honour round the office.

Your not normal if finding a fiver or a tenner in your pocket doesn’t invoke this kind of response.

Heat_Wave

Stupidity

Alf Veedersane

gogo wrote: »

Your not normal if finding a fiver or a tenner in your pocket doesn’t invoke this kind of response.

That's ok. I did think framing the fiver was OTT but that's reassuring.

s4uv3

s4uv3 wrote: »

No recession in your house, wha!

When I was 19 I inherited 7k. It changed my life in that it bought me my first car. I was a broke student, so saving that much back then was way out of reach.

oh Gawd, I came across as a right knob saying that, didnt I.

I should have said it wouldn't change things in the long term, so maybe put it into an investment fund where inflation wouldn't devour it and it should grow in real terms. 7k would change my life too!!

mistersifter

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

oh Gawd, I came across as a right knob saying that, didnt I.

I should have said it wouldn't change things in the long term, so maybe put it into an investment fund where inflation wouldn't devour it and it should grow in real terms. 7k would change my life too!!

which only leaves one question:


what gob****e spends 25 euro per month on coffee if they dont like it?!

Alf Veedersane

beertons wrote: »

Forget the cash. Teach them things, bring them places. Money is just buying their friendship.

It's also a very efficient way of buying their friendship.

€25 must be less than 20 minutes of your time bit you'd never bring them somewhere and back in less than 20 mins

One eyed Jack

aaaaaaaahhhhhh wrote: »

Hey AH,
What do ppl think.


My GF was made god-mother of her friends kid two years ago, her friend has no siblings so she was first in line. They prob see each other once every two months etc(not as much like since her friend had the child).


Anyway she opened a bank account for the child and is putting 25 quid a month into it.


Shes been told(not by the child's parents) that there's no need to be doing that cos its not like your niece/nephew.


Should she continue putting in the money monthly(she puts extra in for Bdays and Xmas) or should she stop and just do the Bday/Xmas?


On one hand its only 25quid but on the other will her friend be p!$$3d that she stopped putting in the monthly amount, I think she was going to stop when the kid is 18.

What does your girlfriend think herself about what she chooses to do with her own money?

aaaaaaaahhhhhh

One eyed Jack wrote: »

What does your girlfriend think herself about what she chooses to do with her own money?

That like it's only 25quid a month so what's the issue, but so many of her friends and family have told her shes crazy to be doing that for a non blood relative, where's she just thinks it's a nice thing to do rather than waste it on stuff the child prob wont use in two months.

One eyed Jack

aaaaaaaahhhhhh wrote: »

That like it's only 25quid a month so what's the issue, but so many of her friends and family have told her shes crazy to be doing that for a non blood relative, where's she just thinks it's a nice thing to do rather than waste it on stuff the child prob wont use in two months.

Sure if she’s happy doing it in that case. I just wouldn’t want everyone knowing about it though as it does give other people the opportunity to pass judgment upon her for doing what seems to make her happy. If she’s able to afford it I honestly don’t see why not. It’s not generally the done thing but it’s completely harmless at the same time.

freshpopcorn

If the news got out. She could find herself being asked by a lot to be godmother!

The Princess Bride

aaaaaaaahhhhhh wrote: »

That like it's only 25quid a month so what's the issue, but so many of her friends and family have told her shes crazy to be doing that for a non blood relative, where's she just thinks it's a nice thing to do rather than waste it on stuff the child prob wont use in two months.

I think it's a lovely and generous idea.
I just don't understand why your girlfriend needs to tell her friends and family, or why they feel they need to give an opinion on it.

I have one godchild, and she always get more than my nephews because she's my only one.
But nobody else* needs to know this.


('cept hundreds of interweb people, obviously.)*

Bitches Be Trypsin

s4uv3 wrote: »

No recession in your house, wha!

When I was 19 I inherited 7k. It changed my life in that it bought me my first car. I was a broke student, so saving that much back then was way out of reach.

I'm just finishing college now and honestly 7k would change my life at the minute It's so out of reach for a lot of people at the moment!

pgj2015

i have two god parents. one is my dads brother, the other is my mothers sister. im old enough now that i dont need money or presents from my god parents. my god mother gave me 20 pounds or 30 euro every birthday. my god father gave me 20 pence one time after he heard it was my birthday. my god mother gave me money until i was 21 id say, i will never forget her for that. i was happy with money once a year.

mistersifter

Bitches Be Trypsin wrote: »

I'm just finishing college now and honestly 7k would change my life at the minute It's so out of reach for a lot of people at the moment!

Student or not, I think anyone who wouldn't feel serious benefit from 7k is probably out of touch with most people's reality.

When my car died last year, the couple of grand I had put aside was a life-saver. Right now, a few grand would go a serious way to a deposit on a house.

I think that anyone who would expect you to save for their kid is probably a snob, much like the kind of person who expects a massive cash gift from everyone at their wedding. Maybe that's not the case here but the typical Irish people with "notions" really get on my nerves.

Your average Joe soap is under a fair bit of pressure to pay their monthly bills and save a bit for their future. So i would say spending time with nieces and nephews is the most important thing. If you have cash to spend then great but there is always some occasion or other: birthdays, Christmas, communions, etc, etc.

Each to their own and if you're loaded then I'm sure you wont feel 25 euro per month but my opinion would be not to put yourself under unnecessary stress.

The whole concept of being a godparent is a bit lost on me anyway to be honest.

Grayson

I'm god parent to my niece and i don't do anything like that.

I do spoil them rotten. I mean really badly. The amount of presents I buy them (her and her brother) is ridiculous.

Grayson

freshpopcorn wrote: »

If the news got out. She could find herself being asked by a lot to be godmother!

Can she be my god mother? I know I'm an atheist but cash might change my mind on the whole god thing.

It’s absolutely ridiculous to see people still act in ways that attach financial matters to those of faith.

She’s a bit of a dope dupe in this regard.

KikiLaRue

It depends. If she makes 24k a year it's a bit ridiculous. If she makes 90k a year it's probably grand, maybe even a bit tight.

aaaaaaaahhhhhh

The Princess Bride wrote: »

I think it's a lovely and generous idea.
friends and family feel they need to give an opinion on it.

This is the biggest thing for her now, it's only her mom, sister and two besties that know, but their constantly at her to stop even though it doesn't effect them in the slightest.

It's too early to be giving the kid money/presents in the hand really cos the kid only turned two, so she just thinks this is the best thing.

the_pen_turner

i can see something like this creating problems down the line

has she talked to the other godparent to see how they feel. it puts them in a terrible position

what about how the other children are going to feel if their godparent doesnt do this

it sets a precedent that other god parents will be expected to do

what happens if she cannot stay paying in. the parents will be expecting this money





personally i think its a crazy idea but each to their own

kowloon

Lock it away in some sort of investment rather than just sticking it in an account.

Grayson

aaaaaaaahhhhhh wrote: »

This is the biggest thing for her now, it's only her mom, sister and two besties that know, but their constantly at her to stop even though it doesn't effect them in the slightest.

It's too early to be giving the kid money/presents in the hand really cos the kid only turned two, so she just thinks this is the best thing.

She might be right. I love doing stuff for my god daughter. I'm always thinking about what i'll get her next. And I try to be responsible with it. I've bought science kits, stephen hawking books and stuff like that. I've also bought costumes (because costumes generate less waste. Toys tend to be played with and thrown into a corner. The costume get played with, hung up and then played with again. When they outgrow them they're generally in good nick and can be passed onto another relative or a charity shop) train sets and some other toys. I buy clothes and stuff like that too.

However if I didn't have that interest and still wanted to do something, then throwing money into an account might be an option. The woman obviously feels a duty or responsibility and that's admirable.

Chris_Heilong

Birthday, Christmas and communions/Confirmation is all she should be worried about.

ILoveYourVibes

I think it's a lovely thing to do.

aaaaaaaahhhhhh

Grayson wrote: »

The woman obviously feels a duty or responsibility and that's admirable.

You hit the nail on the head Grayson.
In her mind I think, the parents were good enough to consider and make her GM, therefore she feels a duty to ensure she can do all she can for the kid.
She doesn't see the kid often, cos we all have our own lives and day jobs etc, so this is her way of ensuring shes doing something for the kid and that's something in years from now the kid will be grateful for I.e. the lump sum

aaaaaaaahhhhhh

JayZeus wrote: »

It’s absolutely ridiculous to see people still act in ways that attach financial matters to those of faith.

She’s a bit of a dope dupe in this regard.

If your assuming that shes attributed her kindness, financial or not to any kind of faith, you'd be gravely mistaken JayZeus, the woman hasn't believed in Jebus or any religion since well before we met. It's only a gesture she feels is a duty.

razorblunt

Yeah, I through about 10-15 quid into my Godson's balance a month.
He doesn't really need anything at the moment so Birthday's and Xmas I throw extra cash in.

Dial Hard

Jesus, yis are all very committed to your godchildren. Mine gets about a tenner more than the rest of my niblings for his birthday present and that's it.

My own godmother stopped doing presents once I turned 10 (pretty sure my mam told her to) and I'm not sure my godfather even knows he's my godfather.

As has already been said, each to their own but the whole godparent thing is not something I attach any real relevance to.

aaaaaaaahhhhhh

aaaaaaaahhhhhh wrote: »

If your assuming that shes attributed her kindness, financial or not to any kind of faith, you'd be gravely mistaken JayZeus, the woman hasn't believed in Jebus or any religion since well before we met. It's only a gesture she feels is a duty.

Then why be a godparent?

Agent Smith

beertons wrote: »

Forget the cash. Teach them things, bring them places. Money is just buying their friendship.

for 25 Euro a month i'll be your friend....