Things That Trialvilly Annoy You.

califano

The flight or fight cough.
Your either walking past someone or someone steps out of a shop door when you are entering and maybe you have to check your stride slightly when they do this unnecessary loud dry cough. Its just the tension of a close encounter no matter how fleeting. Its a kind of posturing cough. You just know if you werent there as they stepped out or walk passed you there would be no cough. It can also be a hoik, where they aggressively snot inwards through their nostrils which is a more elevated version of the cough. The message ''You come at me buddy an im ready for you''. I think they think they are in the C wing of Mountjoy with the tension levels in their head. I call it the flight of fight cough!.

Doctors room ghost

People on done deal who price an item as €123456.
Each and all of them can fcuk right fcukin off.
Either write how much you want for it or keep the fcukin thing.

freshpopcorn

Doctors room ghost wrote: »

People on done deal who price an item as €123456.
Each and all of them can fcuk right fcukin off.
Either write how much you want for it or keep the fcukin thing.

Try asking somebody what millage is on a car and the response you get is ''It's a Toyota''.

Deja Boo

Burning the roof of your mouth.

One more for me tonight and it comes under the umbrella term "bint entitlement"

This one is mainly prevalent in supermarkets.

Bint gets to checkout and cashier, as she's swiping through bint's messages states cheerily..... "oh they're two for one"..... and guess what down totters checkout girl to procure for bint that other jar of jam / tub of showergel whatever it may be.

But turn that coin on an angle and through no fault of mine own a product is placed on escalator and duly goes through scanner and don't scan. It ain't on me - that was how I found it. So 7 or more times out of ten checkout girl sends me down, like a bloody sap to procure another similar item. Checkout bird probably uses the 50 seconds or so to give the "sure ya know yourself" look to, either one of her colleagues or to the next bint in line, who, while appreciative of the acknowledgement remains oblivious that it was often through her very own dodderyness that that some other consumer was oft discommoded likewise.

So, in supermarkets, the bint privilege allows bint to not have to suffer the ramifications of her own ineptitude, and just waits there at the counter contentedly, while sometimes surprisingly uses the 70 seconds on average to have a root around her purse/ handbag for whatever it is bints do be rooting for with maybe one or two furtive glances in the direction from whence bint came and amiable shop bird went.

I might write a manifesto yet.

Would need to do a literary course though first so maybe too much hassle.

The bint and her enablers have a lot to answer for

Wayne Jarvis

I have finished work for the week. 50 hours in 4 days. I decided to eat shíte for dinner instead of the healthy meal I had planned. I went to Tesco and got a pizza, chocolate, and decided fook it and got whiskey too. TA at the paranoid feeling I always get at the checkout that everyone is judging me, they're probably not and I shouldn't care but just a small part of me does and it's a trivial annoyance.

js35

Anytime I try to fill in my overplucked since the 90s eyebrows I look exactly like one of the angry birds

Aglomerado

Guy Person wrote: »

I have finished work for the week. 50 hours in 4 days. I decided to eat shíte for dinner instead of the healthy meal I had planned. I went to Tesco and got a pizza, chocolate, and decided fook it and got whiskey too. TA at the paranoid feeling I always get at the checkout that everyone is judging me, they're probably not and I shouldn't care but just a small part of me does and it's a trivial annoyance.

I have often bought just wine, cat food and a pizza.

Some day I'll go in and just buy cucumbers and Vaseline....

Sardonicat

Aglomerado wrote: »

I have often bought just wine, cat food and a pizza.

Some day I'll go in and just buy cucumbers and Vaseline....

And batteries. Don't forget the batteries.

Ted_YNWA

Aglomerado wrote: »

I have often bought just wine, cat food and a pizza.

Some day I'll go in and just buy cucumbers and Vaseline....

And some cable ties.

Sardonicat

Ted_YNWA wrote: »

And some cable ties.

Cripes, nearly forgot . Thanks

Wayne Jarvis

Aglomerado wrote: »

I have often bought just wine, cat food and a pizza.

Some day I'll go in and just buy cucumbers and Vaseline....

TA that I smudged my glasses taking them off to wipe away the tears of laughter this post caused.


Post of the year for me so far without a doubt.

New Home

Aglomerado wrote: »

I have often bought just wine, cat food and a pizza.

Some day I'll go in and just buy cucumbers and Vaseline....

Sardonicat wrote: »

And batteries. Don't forget the batteries.

Ted_YNWA wrote: »

And some cable ties.

That's a mighty peculiar way to make a salad... let alone using the vaseline as dressing...

Sardonicat

New Home wrote: »

That's a mighty peculiar way to make a salad... let alone using the vaseline as dressing...

It's the type of salad the calls for stick of wet celery to compliment the various components. Judicious use of large salad tongs can also add to the overall enjoyment.

New Home

BBC GoodFood website, right?

Sardonicat

New Home wrote: »

BBC GoodFood website, right?

Well, there is a website. ...

Sardonicat

Sardonicat wrote: »

It's the type of salad the calls for stick of wet celery to compliment the various components. Judicious use of large salad tongs can also add to the overall enjoyment.

Salad tongs??

I'm just imagining a forceps situation now!

TA I don't know how to do a puke emoji on here.

Sardonicat

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Salad tongs??

I'm just imagining a forceps situation now!

TA I don't know how to do a puke emoji on here.

Jettison the fork and keep the large spoon...

Sardonicat

TA my sister isn't giving me a night off from taking care of my Dad this week so no, eh, salad for me tomorrow night.

Aglomerado

Guy Person wrote: »

TA that I smudged my glasses taking them off to wipe away the tears of laughter this post caused.


Post of the year for me so far without a doubt.

Thanks. having a sh1tty week so glad I can make people laugh!

Wayne Jarvis

TA that all this talk of cucumbers and large spoons has me feeling emasculated.


Is there no love for the humble pickle??

Ted_YNWA

Do you want some cocktail sausages instead Guy.

TA this food chatter is making me hungry again,

Aglomerado

Guy Person wrote: »

TA that all this talk of cucumbers and large spoons has me feeling emasculated.


Is there no love for the humble pickle??

PICKLE RICK!

freshpopcorn

I know he was only a teenager but I saw something on TV last night about the young scientist and this lad said. ''Cars in the PARKING LOT''

Alecto

Worrying about someone and they didn't pick up when I rang so I know it's going to be a sleepless night. Sigh.

Antares35

Dial Hard wrote: »

I always thought it was Original Poster? That's how I use it.

Anyway, today's TA: people who dawdle up the middle of busy footpaths. I walk from Rathmines to Baggot St Bridge (and back) every day and the amount of people who just meander along. That's their prerogative, fine, but move the fcuk over to the side so people can pass easily, FFS.

And while I'm at it, move to the left, obvs.

Same!
TA just sat through an exam where some idiot just barked and coughed the whole way through. Literally every 20 seconds. People have zero consideration these days .

Antares35

Guy Person wrote: »

I have finished work for the week. 50 hours in 4 days. I decided to eat shíte for dinner instead of the healthy meal I had planned. I went to Tesco and got a pizza, chocolate, and decided fook it and got whiskey too. TA at the paranoid feeling I always get at the checkout that everyone is judging me, they're probably not and I shouldn't care but just a small part of me does and it's a trivial annoyance.

When I used to drink wine I'd always have to buy it in a separate shop to where I bought my cat food. I just couldn't queue up with wine and felix together because it was too much crazy spinster night in!

Omackeral

People saying “super” when they mean very.

e.g .I was super tired.

New Home

I lent someone a CD in early summer, I told that person I wouldn't need it back immediately and to keep it for a few weeks, but I made it very clear that I did want it back. Late November, and still no sign of my CD back. Asked to have it returned in early December, nothing. I asked again before Christmas, I was promised I'd have it back before then, still nothing. I got it back yesterday. BUT THEY HAD REMOVED THE STICKERS FROM THE COVER. :mad: :mad: :mad:

I mean, it's not YOURS, what possesses you to do that? If I'd have wanted to remove the stickers, I'd have done it myself a long time ago! Yes, it's trivial, but it annoys me so much. Almost as much as taking so long to return it.

Trigger Happy

My taste buds have been shot this past few days. That may be a sign of impending sickness which is ok.
But if they were permanently shot I would be devastated. And that's my TA...worrying about what will likely not happen.

Household items that don't perform the one and only task for which they are designed. Absolutely boils my piss that some of the stuff ever even makes it to market:

Pots that topple over on the stove because the handle is heavier than the rest
Tea-towels that leave little micro threads on everything
Tea-towels that aren't absorbent enough so you're just smearing the water around the plates
Toilet seats that won't stay up
Hand soap dispensers with tubes that don't reach the bottom of the bottle, so you can't get the last bit out
Packaging that is impossible to get opened but turns into a chocolate teapot once it's been open for 5 seconds and disintegrates
Crockery that comes with stickers that are either impossible to get off or only comes off halfway
Tinfoil/cling-film that has a crappy serrated cut-off thingy which doesn't work
Kitchen roll that doesn't tear properly
Bin bags that don't come off the roll properly
Floor cleaner that leaves a residue on your nice clean tiles so your feet go "squanch squanch squanch squanch" when you're walking through the kitchen
Christmas crackers that don't pop when you pull them

I mean, the vast majority of these things......that's all they're designed to do, and they fail miserably.

YOU HAD ONE F*CKING JOB!

bonzodog2

Kettles that due to the spout design, when you're only boiling enough water for 1 cup, you have to tip them so far your hand holding the kettle gets scalded by steam

Ragnar Lothbrok

Deleted User wrote: »

Household items that don't perform the one and only task for which they are designed. Absolutely boils my piss that some of the stuff ever even makes it to market:

Pots that topple over on the stove because the handle is heavier than the rest
Tea-towels that leave little micro threads on everything
Tea-towels that aren't absorbent enough so you're just smearing the water around the plates
Toilet seats that won't stay up
Hand soap dispensers with tubes that don't reach the bottom of the bottle, so you can't get the last bit out
Packaging that is impossible to get opened but turns into a chocolate teapot once it's been open for 5 seconds and disintegrates
Crockery that comes with stickers that are either impossible to get off or only comes off halfway
Tinfoil/cling-film that has a crappy serrated cut-off thingy which doesn't work
Kitchen roll that doesn't tear properly
Bin bags that don't come off the roll properly
Floor cleaner that leaves a residue on your nice clean tiles so your feet go "squanch squanch squanch squanch" when you're walking through the kitchen
Christmas crackers that don't pop when you pull them

I mean, the vast majority of these things......that's all they're designed to do, and they fail miserably.

YOU HAD ONE F*CKING JOB!

Brilliant post!

All of the above really get on my nerves, but to see them together in a list is bringing out my inner psycho.

Seanachai

Tall beer glasses, I want a traditional size and shape pint glass not something that looks like it had flowers in it.

bonzodog2

Seanachai wrote: »

Tall beer glasses, I want a traditional size and shape pint glass not something that looks like it had flowers in it.

They are a pain to wash too

Omackeral

Trying to open that hard stubborn plastic packet a new pair of scissors comes in.

''Hang on I'll just get the scis...''







fuck.

Alecto

I'm tired. I'm so very very tired of everything.

Ragnar Lothbrok

Seanachai wrote: »

Tall beer glasses, I want a traditional size and shape pint glass not something that looks like it had flowers in it.

In some bars in Australia I'd ask for a pint of cider or lager and get a glass that was more than a half but less than a pint. I think they called it a "midi". That was seriously more than a TA :mad:

Also, a lot of pubs didn't sell Jager. Even those that did often insisted on pouring the Red Bull rather than giving me the can, which really p!ssed me off.

And don't even get me started on their draconian smoking regulations.

It's a fantastic country, and I had the holiday of a lifetime, but the alcohol and smoking rules were very annoying at times.

Trigger Happy

Alecto wrote: »

I'm tired. I'm so very very tired of everything.

I offer a kick in the arse service if you want to avail.
€1.50 per kick. Guaranteed to rid you of tiredness feelings.

gucci

Deleted User wrote: »

Household items that don't perform the one and only task for which they are designed. Absolutely boils my piss that some of the stuff ever even makes it to market:

Pots that topple over on the stove because the handle is heavier than the rest
Tea-towels that leave little micro threads on everything
Tea-towels that aren't absorbent enough so you're just smearing the water around the plates
Toilet seats that won't stay up
Hand soap dispensers with tubes that don't reach the bottom of the bottle, so you can't get the last bit out
Packaging that is impossible to get opened but turns into a chocolate teapot once it's been open for 5 seconds and disintegrates
Crockery that comes with stickers that are either impossible to get off or only comes off halfway
Tinfoil/cling-film that has a crappy serrated cut-off thingy which doesn't work
Kitchen roll that doesn't tear properly
Bin bags that don't come off the roll properly
Floor cleaner that leaves a residue on your nice clean tiles so your feet go "squanch squanch squanch squanch" when you're walking through the kitchen
Christmas crackers that don't pop when you pull them

I mean, the vast majority of these things......that's all they're designed to do, and they fail miserably.

YOU HAD ONE F*CKING JOB!

Added bonus TA for the glued on plastic serrated edges that don't cut the cling film, but split from the box and will cut your hand or wrist :eek:

IAMAMORON

Trigger Happy wrote: »

I offer a kick in the arse service if you want to avail.
€1.50 per kick. Guaranteed to rid you of tiredness feelings.

Are you side cheek or a major root in the hole?

Asking for a friend.

Omackeral

Any adults that say ''veggies'' instead of vegetables.

Sephiroth_dude

Ragnar Lothbrok wrote: »

In some bars in Australia I'd ask for a pint of cider or lager and get a glass that was more than a half but less than a pint. I think they called it a "midi". That was seriously more than a TA :mad:

Bloody expensive as well!

Gwynplaine

Omackeral wrote: »

Any adults that say ''veggies'' instead of vegetables.

Holibops.

Tacitus Kilgore

Omackeral wrote: »

Any adults that say ''veggies'' instead of vegetables.

I say vaggies cos I think I'm gas - thoughts? :pac:




TA - room temperature sparkling water

Trigger Happy

IAMAMORON wrote: »

Are you side cheek or a major root in the hole?

Asking for a friend.

We are willing to be flexible but generally we find a hearty boot to the coccyx delivers the best value for money.

Paddy Cow

Deleted User wrote: »

Tea-towels that leave little micro threads on everything
Tea-towels that aren't absorbent enough so you're just smearing the water around the plates

I actually started a thread on this in R&R at one stage because it's so annoying. That the heck is the point of tea towels that don't dry???

Alecto

Omackeral wrote: »

Any adults that say ''veggies'' instead of vegetables.

You'd cry if you met my mother or my sister. Everything is about veggies and chillaxing and it's yummy and fab and brill.

Harleen Quinzel

Alecto wrote: »

I'm tired. I'm so very very tired of everything.

Hope everything is okay Alecto.

My TA is the milk I bought yesterday, with a use by date of the 16th, is spoiled and smells revolting.

No tea for me

retro:electro

A tectonic plate of a spot forming on my chin. My whole face literally aches because of it.