Tired

Thespoofer

Hi

I'm a couple of years away from 50 and most of my working life has been in a trade. To be honest I'm feeling it physically now and not sure if I can/want to spend the next period of my working life slaving ( literally) away.

The money's not too bad, I have a mortgage etc but think I'm going through a change or whatever.

Has anyone ever been in similar situation and changed? My character, as much as I may not like to admit is kind of specific, I think after all these years in construction I have a free type of mind and can't see myself restricted to other certain type roles. I just feel I can't breathe, think freely or have dreams anymore because of work and need to break free.

Is this normal thinking as you get a bit older?

Apologies if it's not making sense.

antix80

Mid life crisis, op.

It's no good to say you're vaguely unhappy or trapped without having something else to reach for or dream about.

If you didn't have to worry about money, how would you spend your days?

Odelay

Thespoofer wrote: »

Hi

I'm a couple of years away from 50 and most of my working life has been in a trade. To be honest I'm feeling it physically now and not sure if I can/want to spend the next period of my working life slaving ( literally) away.

The money's not too bad, I have a mortgage etc but think I'm going through a change or whatever.

Has anyone ever been in similar situation and changed? My character, as much as I may not like to admit is kind of specific, I think after all these years in construction I have a free type of mind and can't see myself restricted to other certain type roles. I just feel I can't breathe, think freely or have dreams anymore because of work and need to break free.

Is this normal thinking as you get a bit older?

Apologies if it's not making sense.

Would you consider teaching apprentices or youth-reach? Or a trade counter at a building suppliers?

Are you physically or mentally tired? Have you been to a doctor to get bloods done etc?

Thespoofer

antix80 wrote: »

Mid life crisis, op.

It's no good to say you're vaguely unhappy or trapped without having something else to reach for or dream about.

If you didn't have to worry about money, how would you spend your days?

I know for certain what I do want and have narrowed them down

-My own small business ( was before for few years in my trade but no way would do it in that, needs to be something else)
-more time off to travel, ie take a month during summer with my family
-something to pass on to my kids as in a business they can carry on
-I'm very creative and enjoy creative pursuits

I'm not expecting an answer or solution but just threw them out there. Also thanks for the reply.

Thespoofer

Odelay wrote: »

Would you consider teaching apprentices or youth-reach? Or a trade counter at a building suppliers?

Are you physically or mentally tired? Have you been to a doctor to get bloods done etc?

Both physically and mentally. I've noticed recently I'm getting a bit shaky on and off.
Sometimes when I drink a hot drink etc.

My Dad has Parkinsons fairly bad at this stage.

I rang the doctor twice in the last few months and they have been very busy both times. The receptionist asked ' am I sick' because I'd be waiting for ages so didn't bother.

Recently I was working close by to same doctor surgery so decided to call in, was closed.

I go to the gym to keep my strength up.

It's just my spark is fading a bit.

antix80

Thespoofer wrote: »

I know for certain what I do want and have narrowed them down

-My own business ( was before for few years in my trade but no way would do it in that, needs to be something else)
-more time off to travel, ie take a month during summer with my family
-something to pass on to my kids as in a business they can carry on
-I'm very creative and enjoy creative pursuits

I'm not expecting an answer or solution but just threw them out there. Also thanks for the reply.

What kind of business were you thinking?

The creative stuff sounds nice but if you can't make money from it it's something that you should keep as a hobby.

I know a guy in construction who made a fair bit building outdoor pizza, bread and bbq ovens for people with more money than sense. It was a side business.

The month off is a good idea if you can afford it, even if it means making a few sacrifices or only doing it every 2nd year.

Odelay

Thespoofer wrote: »

Both physically and mentally. I've noticed recently I'm getting a bit shaky on and off.
Sometimes when I drink a hot drink etc.

My Dad has Parkinsons fairly bad at this stage.

I rang the doctor twice in the last few months and they have been very busy both times. The receptionist asked ' am I sick' because I'd be waiting for ages so didn't bother.

Recently I was working close by to same doctor surgery so decided to call in, was closed.

I go to the gym to keep my strength up.

It's just my spark is fading a bit.

Phone the doctors again and make an appointment. It doesn’t matter if they are busy, I think some receptionists gate keep. That is my experience. Ask for an available appointment and keep it.
It’s your health, no one else is going to look after it for you.

NSAman

Phone the doctor without delay.

I have to tell you. Have been physically fit all my life, yeah after work and doing manual labour I was tired but nothing that a few hours sleep wouldn't shake off.

Now in the same age bracket as yourself, I am getting much more tired after a days work. You come to a point where things that you took for granted become a chore to do. Hate to tell you it is partly age related. Things that I would do without batting an eyelid a few years ago, have become much more challenging. Taking on the renovation of a few buildings here, would have been a fun project. I look now at the work and think, christ do I have to do that again?

It is always better to get yourself checked out by a doctor FULLY. After that, either hire people to do it, or cut down on the amount of work.

Jim2007

Thespoofer wrote: »

The receptionist asked ' am I sick' because I'd be waiting for ages so didn't bother.

If you are not feeling your normal self, then you are sick and should seek an appointment with the doctor, as far as the receptionist is concerned.

Postgrad10

Absolutely agree with above. The receptionist is there for making an appointment for you to see the doctor, not to diagnose how sick you are. Make it a priority to see your doctor. You are important. Telling her/ him you are unwell is enough to get the apppintment. No specifics needed.

Berberis

In my mid 50's myself and worked in construction since I was 17 until around 15 yrs ago. last 10 yrs of it was in the training field.
Fell into my current job around then (support services) and it was like a breath of fresh. Not as physically demanding but challenging none the less and equally as rewarding and sense of job satisfaction as construction was to me in my younger days.

Last couple of yrs it seemed to get a bit stale and since then I have veered more towards staff training and mentoring for half my time and the other half working on the front line, which has given me a new buzz.
I think most people who are trade based get tired a lot younger than others and its pretty hard for anyone to get to retirement age still being able to achieve what they could in their younger yrs

Like others have said, you should see Gp at least yearly in my opinion for the full NCT. I've been doing so since my early 40's and have benefited greatly from it (not just physically but mentally too, no more work stress, I now work to live instead of the opposite:)
Best of luck in whatever you do

odyssey06

Get a new GP if at all possible... unless you have reason to think this recent busyness is a blip.

You are going to clock up ailments etc as you age this doesnt seem like a good place for a body NCT.

the14thwarrior

keep thinking and planning and do whatever research you can.
in 5 years time you'll be so tired
in 10 years time you'll be wrecked.
need to get out when you can.

i have changed my trade so to speak, and it took about two years of failed interviews, a few lunches with people who can help, and an in built resilence. oh, my health went off the the scale this past year, and i'm glad now i have options, waiting on one or two jobs to come through.

@cked.

so my advice is not to wait too long, it gets harder when you get older, harder to get a job, harder to convince people etc. that you are capable.
good luck

Jellybaby1

Daft question for a doctor's receptionist to ask 'are you sick?', why else would anyone ring the doctor? Even if someone just wants a sick note, they are still sick. I've found recently doctor's receptionists are getting more bolshie in my GP's surgery. I often wonder if he knows how they treat his patients. Patients are leaving him because of this. Sorry for interrupting the thread.

antix80

Not sure why everyone is dissing the receptionist. So many people think they can turn up on the day without an appointment, add to that people expecting a same day (last minute) appointment... Sounds to me the receptionist was just trying to find a time that would suit for a non urgent appointment. Op should have arranged a day that suited.

Mrs OBumble

Jellybaby1 wrote: »

Daft question for a doctor's receptionist to ask 'are you sick?', why else would anyone ring the doctor?

There are many reasons that people need doctors appointments that don't involve sickness eg contraception, medicals for insurance purposes. And some health issues are non-acute.

The receptionist job is to ensure that the acutely unwell get seen quickly and the rest are seen when possible. They need information to do that.

odyssey06

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

There are many reasons that people need doctors appointments that don't involve sickness eg contraception, medicals for insurance purposes. And some health issues are non-acute.
The receptionist job is to ensure that the acutely unwell get seen quickly and the rest are seen when possible. They need information to do that.

But the person is still sick. It would be much better to phrase it, as you do, using words such as urgent \ acute rather than "are you sick", which is frankly a crass thing to say to someone phoning a GP.

shesty

Go see your GP to start OP.

I worked as a site engineer when I left college for five years, and it was beyond exhausting.And I was in my early twenties then.(I'm a female).I know plenty of men I went to college with who did the same, and they lasted longer but not much.It's so tough on your body and we weren't doing heavy labour that you would be, although the hours were a killer.We would all say that we started to feel burnout just from the pressure of the job, the 50-60hour weeks, and the sheer amount of time running around a building site, by our mid-twenties.

It's not a midlife crisis, it is your body beginning to tell you it needs a break.I moved to an office job after site, and it was very, very tough, as you say the "lack" of freedom-at this stage in your career, I would think it would be a really hard transition for you to make.Is there anything else you could do?Some suggestions here are really good.Or would you be interested in looking into facilities or maintenance in office buildings, maybe roles in Harbours or Ports, or something like that-might be lighter duties and better hours, and you could keep up the creative side at home, maybe develop a small side business.Our local Men's Sheds do a lot of craft work for the area, that could be something to look into.Even just to make some connections.

Either way I wouldn't write it off-building sites are tough to work on and manual labour takes it's toll.

beauf

Driving a hackney or taxi worked for a builder I know. Only he does shorter hours. Than the younger drivers. Making it viable with the cost of insurance was a problem though.

I moved from construction into office work (lT) but I did it when I was much younger. TBH I've always found office hours and same routine tough. I'm just not wired like that. If you get on with the people in the office though makes a big difference.

Mrs OBumble

odyssey06 wrote: »

But the person is still sick. It would be much better to phrase it, as you do, using words such as urgent \ acute rather than "are you sick", which is frankly a crass thing to say to someone phoning a GP.

Someone having a six-month contraceptive review is not sick. Someone getting a medical done for a job is not sick. Etc

Really this is off topic - except that if the OP cannot navigate something like making an appointment with a busy GP, then I don't think that they should be considering self-employment. Customers who don't want to pay will be a lot more slippery than any doctors receptionist.

Asitis2019

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Someone having a six-month contraceptive review is not sick. Someone getting a medical done for a job is not sick. Etc

Really this is off topic - except that if the OP cannot navigate something like making an appointment with a busy GP, then I don't think that they should be considering self-employment. Customers who don't want to pay will be a lot more slippery than any doctors receptionist.

I think your response is very, very nasty, and you should be ashamed of such comments.

Strumms

If you feel that way about your work / career...seek a change... you are young enough now to do it... don’t get bogged down like I made the mistake of doing... reskill/upskill or just move or both... your happiness is the backbone and driving force for life and dreams...life is too short to be spending 180 hours a month in a place you don’t like, doing things that have no interest to you... now is the time..get moving.

Mrs OBumble

Asitis2019 wrote: »

I think your response is very, very nasty, and you should be ashamed of such comments.

There's nothing nasty about it.

Self employment is HARD. Way way harder than working for someone else. It is not an option for someone who is feeling tired or has difficulty negotiating moderately difficult conversations.

What's nasty is ignoring obvious issues and giving false encouragement which sets people up for failure.