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Unpopular Opinions - OP Updated with Threadban List 4/5/21

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    #242
    Dial Hard
    Registered Users Posts: 13,758 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard


    DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »
    You'd want to see what I live with.

    Woman hasn't worked in nearly 8 yrs, refuses to get a job.


    It's very difficult to operate a single income household these days.


    I'm breaking my bollox off working in a family business that's going down. While she swans around town with her friends for coffee, spending my money and neglecting our son.

    Why are you with someone you clearly can't stand???


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    #243
    Raconteuse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,817 ✭✭✭Raconteuse


    BDI wrote: »
    So is it an unpopular opinion that if a kept woman spends 3 euro on a coffee once a week she is neglecting her son?
    God I don't see anywhere that she goes for one coffee a week and nothing more.

    The unpopular opinion is that he's not a fan of paternity leave.

    He sounds resentful but if she is spending a lot of his hard earned money on clothes, shoes and lunches, then that's not fair.


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    #244
    DEFTLEFTHAND
    Registered Users Posts: 16,500 ✭✭✭✭DEFTLEFTHAND


    Raconteuse wrote: »
    She shouldn't be throwing money away of course but when you say neglecting your son, who is minding him when she meets her friends for coffee?

    And would it not cost a fortune in childcare anyway if she did get a job? I don't see an issue with the mother not working (for a few years anyway) but not to be taking the piss with the father's money obviously.
    She hasn't since he was born. She drops him up to either her own mam or my mam to be minded when she goes on her excursions.

    I'm taking steps after our son turns 18. I'm trying to be honourable by keeping it going when he's underage. A child has a right to be raised with his mum and his dad.The last thing I want to do is fck him up.


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    #245
    Dial Hard
    Registered Users Posts: 13,758 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard


    DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »
    She hasn't since he was born. She drops him up to either her own mam or my mam to be minded when she goes on her excursions.

    I'm taking steps after our son turns 18. I'm trying to be honourable by keeping it going when he's underage. A child has a right to be raised with his mum and his dad.The last thing I want to do is fck him up.

    A child has a right to be raised in as happy and stable an environment as possible. Living with two parents who don't like or respect let alone love eachother, with clear resentment issues and both of whom seem to be pretty absent in different ways, is really not in the child's best interests, sorry.

    Apologies if that sounds harsh because you clearly feel you're doing the right thing for him, but keeping everyone in what sounds like a horrible arrangement could easily fcuk him up more in the long run than you two separating.

    And now I shall remove my beak from your business.


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    #246
    DEFTLEFTHAND
    Registered Users Posts: 16,500 ✭✭✭✭DEFTLEFTHAND


    Dial Hard wrote: »
    Why are you with someone you clearly can't stand???
    It's not that I can't stand her, I still love her and we have great craic together.



    It's just that she has no appreciation of my situation, I don't think our fam business will last another year, we're in dire straits tbh, I actually cried in my office last Thursday after a meeting with our accountant. I'm under unreal stress.


    She doesn't give a hoot about this, she's almost childlike when it comes to real life adult issues.


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    #247
    Paddy Cow
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,576 ✭✭✭Paddy Cow


    DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »
    It's not that I can't stand her, I still love her and we have great craic together.



    It's just that she has no appreciation of my situation, I don't think our fam business will last another year, we're in dire straits tbh, I actually cried in my office last Thursday after a meeting with our accountant. I'm under unreal stress.


    She doesn't give a hoot about this, she's almost childlike when it comes to real life adult issues.
    I used to work for a couple and the wife was kinda like yours. Now she did work and wasn't lazy but her attitude to finances was appalling. She spent it quicker than it was coming in and was irresponsible in that she'd go to the cash and carry and not bother to keep the invoice, which is obviously needed for the accountant. It used to drive the husband up the wall because he was the one going to and meeting the accounting/taking care of all the finances etc and she simply didn't give a sh!t. Like you say, it was almost a childlike attitude in her total refusal to consider any sort of responsibility.


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    #248
    Experience_day
    Registered Users Posts: 359 ✭✭Experience_day


    DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »
    It's not that I can't stand her, I still love her and we have great craic together.



    It's just that she has no appreciation of my situation, I don't think our fam business will last another year, we're in dire straits tbh, I actually cried in my office last Thursday after a meeting with our accountant. I'm under unreal stress.


    She doesn't give a hoot about this, she's almost childlike when it comes to real life adult issues.


    Does she know this? Have you communicated it to her?


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    #249
    Airyfairy12
    Registered Users Posts: 3,405 ✭✭✭Airyfairy12


    DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »
    It's not that I can't stand her, I still love her and we have great craic together.



    It's just that she has no appreciation of my situation, I don't think our fam business will last another year, we're in dire straits tbh, I actually cried in my office last Thursday after a meeting with our accountant. I'm under unreal stress.


    She doesn't give a hoot about this, she's almost childlike when it comes to real life adult issues.

    Was she like this before you married her? Surely you knew what you were getting into or did thing change after your son came along?

    She will never change, I have friends just like her, in the beginning their excuse for not looking for work was because the cost of childcare is too high, now their kids are almost in secondary school and theyre still not working, living off their partners wage and their social welfare, every morning they go to the gym, meet up for breakfast or lunch, get their hair and nails done, spending someone elses money, at the end of the month they can barely make rent despite having a great income every week.

    You married a spoiled little princess who will never be able to support herself, if you leave her, she'll find someone else to pay her way.


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    #250
    Paddy Cow
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,576 ✭✭✭Paddy Cow


    Airyfairy12 wrote: »
    Was she like this before you married her? Surely you knew what you were getting into or did thing change after your son came along?

    She will never change, I have friends just like her, in the beginning their excuse for not looking for work was because the cost of childcare is too high, now their kids are almost in secondary school and theyre still not working, living off their partners wage and their social welfare, every morning they go to the gym, meet up for breakfast or lunch, get their hair and nails done, spending someone elses money, at the end of the month they can barely make rent despite having a great income every week.

    You married a spoiled little princess who will never be able to support herself, if you leave her, she'll find someone else to pay her way.
    And if they separate, the wife will get the house and kids as the primary care giver and the husband will be far worse off financially, which is why many men stay.


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    #251
    Airyfairy12
    Registered Users Posts: 3,405 ✭✭✭Airyfairy12


    Paddy Cow wrote: »
    And if they separate, the wife will get the house and kids as the primary care giver and the husband will be far worse off financially, which is why many men stay.

    Exactly, it leaves men trapped but in saying that men love these types of women, theres so many women who are independent financially, look after themselves or just dont expect anyone to pay their way but theyre single yet women who see men as their personal piggy bank have no problem getting into relationships.
    The men have no problem agreeing to a shared bank account (with a partner who has no money) and then wonder where their money is gone every month.
    Theres two in it.


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    #252
    Edgware
    Registered Users Posts: 5,874 ✭✭✭Edgware


    Some men are completely under the wifes thumb. I have no sympathy for them. They shoud have known what they were marrying


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    #253
    whisky_galore
    Registered Users Posts: 16,333 ✭✭✭✭whisky_galore


    Edgware wrote: »
    Some men are completely under the wifes thumb. I have no sympathy for them. They shoud have known what they were marrying

    A replacement for their mammies.


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    #254
    The_Kew_Tour
    Registered Users Posts: 34,316 ✭✭✭✭The_Kew_Tour


    Edgware wrote: »
    Some men are completely under the wifes thumb. I have no sympathy for them. They shoud have known what they were marrying

    Women can change too once married. It’s not always clear cut


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    #255
    Sorry about that
    Closed Accounts Posts: 632 ✭✭✭Sorry about that


    Edgware wrote: »
    Some men are completely under the wifes thumb. I have no sympathy for them. They shoud have known what they were marrying

    Maybe they don't want sympathy and love being dominated.


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    #256
    the_pen_turner
    Registered Users Posts: 7,515 ✭✭✭the_pen_turner


    Sorry about that wrote: »
    Maybe they don't want sympathy and love being dominated.

    or they are one of the many victims of domestic violance


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    #257
    Sorry about that
    Closed Accounts Posts: 632 ✭✭✭Sorry about that


    the_pen_turner wrote: »
    or they are one of the many victims of domestic violance

    Not all relationships are straight down the middle. We're attracted to a type; some women (me for example) like a strong man who likes to be in charge- this doesn't mean I'm abused!

    Similarly, plenty of men like a stronger woman; it doesn't always spell abuse. Of course there will always be abusive relationships, but it doesn't mean they all are.


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    #258
    Mad_maxx
    Registered Users Posts: 13,503 ✭✭✭✭Mad_maxx


    DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »
    It's not that I can't stand her, I still love her and we have great craic together.



    It's just that she has no appreciation of my situation, I don't think our fam business will last another year, we're in dire straits tbh, I actually cried in my office last Thursday after a meeting with our accountant. I'm under unreal stress.


    She doesn't give a hoot about this, she's almost childlike when it comes to real life adult issues.

    My brother is a farmer, do what you need to do, farmers are expected to carry on even the business model is broken, no other sector would do it

    Not being glib I hope, I don't know your situation


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    #259
    the beer revolu
    Registered Users Posts: 17,040 ✭✭✭✭the beer revolu


    People who decide to live in the arsehole of nowhere, having no previous connection with the area, should not expect great public services and should not be surprised at suffering from "rural isolation" and vulnerability later in life.

    What did you expect?


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    #260
    Blueshoe
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,964 ✭✭✭Blueshoe


    Public sector pensions should be abolished. All workers should be on the contributory state model.


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    #261
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 3,689 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Headings along the lines of ".....Technical team" / " something Technology Department" virtually always denote some organisation unit whose job it is to obfuscate and fudge to external interested parties, some real world function inside a company.


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    #262
    Experience_day
    Registered Users Posts: 359 ✭✭Experience_day


    the beer revolu wrote: »
    People who decide to live in the arsehole of nowhere, having no previous connection with the area, should not expect great public services and should not be surprised at suffering from "rural isolation" and vulnerability later in life.

    What did you expect?


    Lots of people don't realise just how inbred the locals usually are til its too late? Most people who move in come from places where it's not normal to know everyone in a place (and be probably related in some way to them).


    Oh and the fact that the locals are usually provincial, small minded boring ba$tards (hence not moving away themselves) which doesn't help.


    Culchies are really something special.


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    #263
    Game of Thrones Fan
    Registered Users Posts: 112 ✭✭Game of Thrones Fan


    I believe that the more infrastructure and technology advance, that the more such a society suits women and the more redundant men become.


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    #264
    A Shropshire Lad
    Registered Users Posts: 196 ✭✭A Shropshire Lad


    I think Ireland should leave the European Union


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    #265
    Game of Thrones Fan
    Registered Users Posts: 112 ✭✭Game of Thrones Fan


    A Shropshire Lad wrote: »
    I think Ireland should leave the European Union
    If you actually mean that, I'd love to hear why?


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    #266
    Paddy Cow
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,576 ✭✭✭Paddy Cow


    Game of Thrones Fan wrote: »
    If you actually mean that, I'd love to hear why?
    They tuk ur jobs.


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    #267
    vriesmays
    Registered Users Posts: 1,570 ✭✭✭vriesmays


    School leavers with 600 points shouldn't go to college in Ireland, much better ones abroad.


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    #268
    Raconteuse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,817 ✭✭✭Raconteuse


    A degree is a degree. The building it was completed in hardly makes a difference. My American cousin didn't complete medicine in an Ivy League school, she completed it in unheard of colleges in Ohio and upstate New York... yet there she is with a permanent job in Sloan Kettering.


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    #269
    mr_fegelien
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,483 ✭✭✭mr_fegelien


    Raconteuse wrote: »
    A degree is a degree. The building it was completed in hardly makes a difference. My American cousin didn't complete medicine in an Ivy League school, she completed it in unheard of colleges in Ohio and upstate New York... yet there she is with a permanent job in Sloan Kettering.

    However getting into an Ivy League college can offer way better connections which are sometimes more important than the degree itself.


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    #270
    wiggle16
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 3,022 Mod ✭✭✭✭wiggle16


    I'm not conservative in any way, except for one thing. I'm fully in favour of the death penalty. Most people who know me don't believe me when it comes up.

    I think there are some things which are so bad that you forfeit your right to be tolerated by society in a prison system. Premeditated murder, child sexual abuse, rape.


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    #271
    the beer revolu
    Registered Users Posts: 17,040 ✭✭✭✭the beer revolu


    wiggle16 wrote: »
    I'm not conservative in any way, except for one thing. I'm fully in favour of the death penalty. Most people who know me don't believe me when it comes up.

    I think there are some things which are so bad that you forfeit your right to be tolerated by society in a prison system. Premeditated murder, child sexual abuse, rape.

    You're right.
    Being in favour of murder is very unpopular.
    Although becoming worryingly popular.


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