Suspended with Pay.

road_high

Why not do what everyone does these days in these circumstances- claim extreme mental stress and that you basically flipped out ? They can’t really say no you didn’t

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

Suspended with pay usually means you’ll be sacked. Don’t worry either way. If you’re applying for new roles, don’t specify that you’ve left your current role. Just put September ‘17 - date on it. At any interview, just state that you’re still employed there. That way, you won’t need to give a reference from that company, just your role before it.

Muppet Man

I'd go back in for the meeting. Believe it or not it's a useful learning exercise to be sacked. It will Stand well to you if you are ever in a similar situation. Learning to keep calm and not retaliate when getting the bad news can be quite empowering. Good luck. And maybe consider a different career.

OU812

You’ve admitted to a few. Go to the meeting, don’t admit to any more. If they’re going to fire you, get fired for misconduct rather than gross misconduct.

Admit to nothing apart from the already copped ones and let them prove the others.

No point taking the blame for something they’re not aware of.

If you keep your job, don’t do it again.

cannotlogin

I don't understand it.

It's self sabotage and there's no way you could have thought you would continue to get away with it and would have known the likely consequences.

Why do it rather than just get a new job, or hand in your notice? What were you trying to achieve? Wanting to be fired rather than quiting.

If I was the employer, that's what I would be wondering.

isohon

dartboardio wrote: »

Hi,

No judgement please. I know what I've done is ridiculous

Yesterday I got suspended from work for the week with pay because they noticed I had been disconnecting calls (I work in a call centre) I had been doing this for a few week/months every few days. They only know about six or seven occasions but suspended me so they could look further into it.

Obviously I admitted it straight away, and I'm embarrassed and ashamed.

They are having me back for a meeting next week to discuss the 'outcome' but in my eyes I'm just like, ah that's the job gone, I'm not going back to be told oh yeah we found you done that another 150 times heres your p45

Would you just never return and start looking for more jobs? Or have the balls to go in and do the outcome meeting?

PS. I was there two years

I've worked in a call centre, so I get it.

Go to the meeting. Whether you get to keep the job or not, and it is highly unlikely you will. Go the meeting and face the consequences. You already anticipate(know) that they will terminate you so you are dealing with the worst outcome already anyway.

Go and continue as you have to acknowledge that you did wrong, and without seeking to defend yourself. This is a lesson for you to learn, and you won't learn it fully if you don't face it fully.

dartboardio

cannotlogin wrote: »

I don't understand it.

It's self sabotage and there's no way you could have thought you would continue to get away with it and would have known the likely consequences.

Why do it rather than just get a new job, or hand in your notice? What were you trying to achieve? Wanting to be fired rather than quiting.

If I was the employer, that's what I would be wondering.

Obviously I thought I was getting away with it as I was doing it for so long to be honest.

I have known little scumbags coming in and working there for 2 months and then doing things like this on purpose, trying to get sacked.

That was not what I was trying to do (believe it or not) I'm 21 and have never been on the dole once,
working in hospitality sector type jobs since the age of 16,

It's just whatever clicked in my head I suppose, to start acting the maggot on the sly thinking I could get away with it forever.

Lesson learned as they say.

And I appreciate all the constructive feedback.

BDI

Why do you people do that crap for minimum wage? Have you no self worth? Lecturing me on my phrasing of a question. I spent today on an outdoor building site, lashing all day, hard slog, I could work a call center gig in a dressing gown that’s what I meant.

I however get treated with respect and paid decently. They have entry level jobs for unskilled laborers on about 13 quid an hour and you could go up quickly to about 16 or 17 and then more depending on how you apply yourself or get lucky opportunitywise.

Anybody comes near me moaning or cursing and blinding will get told to come back when they have calmed down.

I interviewed for one of these jobs years ago during the recession and they didn’t give me one. I suspect they sensed I had a spine.
Go to a construction recruitment agency and tell them you can use a cloth and you will have a job within a week no questions asked. 13 euro an hour.

I’d take the dole rather than work in the call centre industry. If the call centre industry have a problem with that they can improve their terms and conditions.

I’m sorry if I upset you but my heart is in the right place. Go in and tell them why you don’t want the job anymore in a balanced manner. Then ask them for a good reference.

redarmyblues

dartboardio wrote: »

Obviously I thought I was getting away with it as I was doing it for so long to be honest.

I have known little scumbags coming in and working there for 2 months and then doing things like this on purpose, trying to get sacked.

That was not what I was trying to do (believe it or not) I'm 21 and have never been on the dole in my life, working in hospitality sector type jobs since the age of 16

It's just whatever clicked in my head I suppose, to start acting the maggot on the sly thinking I could get away with it forever.

Lesson learned as they say.

And I appreciate all the constructive feedback.

You're coming 21 and never been on the Dole, well done you but judging by your attitude you have a big future on it. But don't worry this country has a super generous Welfare System where they ask no questions, not.

Peatys

dartboardio wrote: »

Hi,

No judgement please. I know what I've done is ridiculous

redarmyblues wrote: »

You're coming 21 and never been on the Dole, well done you but judging by your attitude you have a big future on it. But don't worry this country has a super generous Welfare System where they ask no questions, not.

You glad you got that off your chest?

John Hutton

Worked in a call center too OP so I understand why you did it. The trick is to just break something when it gets too much.

You shouldn't have admitted it.

If you want to keep the job go in an start crying about stress and how you were overwhelmed and afraid to talk to anyone about it, that you find the job very stressful and have been bottling it up.

anewme

BDI wrote: »

Why do you people do that crap for minimum wage? Have you no self worth? Lecturing me on my phrasing of a question. I spent today on an outdoor building site, lashing all day, hard slog, I could work a call center gig in a dressing gown that’s what I meant.

I however get treated with respect and paid decently. They have entry level jobs for unskilled laborers on about 13 quid an hour and you could go up quickly to about 16 or 17 and then more depending on how you apply yourself or get lucky opportunitywise.

Anybody comes near me moaning or cursing and blinding will get told to come back when they have calmed down.

I interviewed for one of these jobs years ago during the recession and they didn’t give me one. I suspect they sensed I had a spine.
Go to a construction recruitment agency and tell them you can use a cloth and you will have a job within a week no questions asked. 13 euro an hour.

I’d take the dole rather than work in the call centre industry. If the call centre industry have a problem with that they can improve their terms and conditions.

I’m sorry if I upset you but my heart is in the right place. Go in and tell them why you don’t want the job anymore in a balanced manner. Then ask them for a good reference.

With all due respect, this is a serious issue the OP is facing.

It's not about you.

dartboardio

I didn't mean it like that, I know 21 is extremely young ( I didn't wanna be like, oh I'm ONLY 21, pity me)

I was trying to give you context. I have no interest in being on the dole and wasn't trying to get fired, so I could go on it, so no need for whoever made that snarky comment.

redarmyblues

Peatys wrote: »

You glad you got that off your chest?

Ya.

dartboardio

dartboardio wrote: »

Obviously I thought I was getting away with it as I was doing it for so long to be honest.

I have known little scumbags coming in and working there for 2 months and then doing things like this on purpose, trying to get sacked.

That was not what I was trying to do (believe it or not) I'm 21 and have never been on the dole in my life, working in hospitality sector type jobs since the age of 16

It's just whatever clicked in my head I suppose, to start acting the maggot on the sly thinking I could get away with it forever.

Lesson learned as they say.

And I appreciate all the constructive feedback.

I think you need to start appreciating the critical feedback also IMHO, if you’re going to change in the future. You alluded to “personal issues” at the start of this thread and finally stated that you’re just lazy- fair enough- you are what you are- but people are giving you good advice here, some of which is hard to take, and you’re ignoring it.

Salary Negotiator

BDI wrote: »

Why do you people do that crap for minimum wage? Have you no self worth? Lecturing me on my phrasing of a question. I spent today on an outdoor building site, lashing all day, hard slog, I could work a call center gig in a dressing gown that’s what I meant.

I however get treated with respect and paid decently. They have entry level jobs for unskilled laborers on about 13 quid an hour and you could go up quickly to about 16 or 17 and then more depending on how you apply yourself or get lucky opportunitywise.

Anybody comes near me moaning or cursing and blinding will get told to come back when they have calmed down.

I interviewed for one of these jobs years ago during the recession and they didn’t give me one. I suspect they sensed I had a spine.
Go to a construction recruitment agency and tell them you can use a cloth and you will have a job within a week no questions asked. 13 euro an hour.

I’d take the dole rather than work in the call centre industry. If the call centre industry have a problem with that they can improve their terms and conditions.

I’m sorry if I upset you but my heart is in the right place. Go in and tell them why you don’t want the job anymore in a balanced manner. Then ask them for a good reference.

Or maybe they just thought you were a bit of a prick and wouldn’t gel well with customers or staff.

Some people are better suited to being outside.

dartboardio

redarmyblues wrote: »

You're coming 21 and never been on the Dole, well done you but judging by your attitude you have a big future on it. But don't worry this country has a super generous Welfare System where they ask no questions, not.

Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning,

Your attitude stinks, what I meant was I'm 21 and have never been on the dole and have no interest in it either, trying to give you context here, or did you even understand that?

Yep I'm sure you can tell I'll be on the dole 'for my big future' just by me messing up one job, cause that's how it works :pac::pac:

John Hutton

Honestly though OP you are better off out of a call centre, it's soul destroying. Just leave it off the CV and say you were travelling

ebbsy

asteroids over berlin wrote: »

Well deserved!

Brain dead answer

dartboardio

Deleted User wrote: »

I think you need to start appreciating the critical feedback also IMHO, if you’re going to change in the future. You alluded to “personal issues” at the start of this thread and finally stated that you’re just lazy- fair enough- you are what you are- but people are giving you good advice here, some of which is hard to take, and you’re ignoring it.

With all due respect to you, I think you're reading parts of the thread and ignoring others, just to get a rise.

I do have ongoing personal issues, which affected my attendance, yes, already admitted that, but that's nothing to do with why I've gotten suspended, that's due to me thinking I could get away with disconnecting calls when they weren't fully resolved.

I did not say 'I am lazy' earlier in the thread, I clearly stated call centre work can make you lazy, due to the environment, and maybe I should return to active work, like running around a restaurant, or cafe,
I've made a mistake and owned it, but you continue to come across as an undesirable with your snotty remarks.


Thanks anyway for trying to help!

By the way, I have accepted feedback and thanked other Boardsies.. maybe if you bothered to read it all you'd know

Atlantic Dawn

Do you want the job? Having worked in a call centre many moons ago I know how pressurised it can be to maintain service levels and stats, could you not angle at the meeting that you were under pressure at the time and it won't happen again?

If you are sacked you will get jobseekers straight away, if you resign it will be 9 weeks.

dartboardio

Atlantic Dawn wrote: »

Do you want the job? Having worked in a call centre many moons ago I know how pressurised it can be to maintain service levels and stats, could you not angle at the meeting that you were under pressure at the time and it won't happen again?

If you are sacked you will get jobseekers straight away, if you resign it will be 9 weeks.

Thanks,
Unsure if I want the job tbh it seems 50/50 in my head. Then again the last couple of months I've been dreaming of switching jobs, then come Monday morning I'll go in and be like ah sure isn't this grand, I'll stay for another while, maybe that's just making the best of a bad thing, I don't really know.

I don't want to go on jobseekers but if I don't get a new job within the next week to 10 days, I will apply then.

Think I will just not return, as I feel pretty ashamed for doing it in the first place!

Great advice here anyway from most.

dartboardio

dartboardio wrote: »

With all due respect to you, I think you're reading parts of the thread and ignoring others, just to get a rise.

I do have ongoing personal issues, which affected my attendance, yes, already admitted that, but that's nothing to do with why I've gotten suspended, that's due to me thinking I could get away with disconnecting calls when they weren't fully resolved.

I did not say 'I am lazy' earlier in the thread, I clearly stated call centre work can make you lazy, due to the environment, and maybe I should return to active work, like running around a restaurant, or cafe,
I've made a mistake and owned it, but you continue to come across as an undesirable with your snotty remarks.


Thanks anyway for trying to help!

By the way, I have accepted feedback and thanked other Boardsies.. maybe if you bothered to read it all you'd know

Reassure yourself with “thanks”, if that’s what comforts you.

I can see why you’re suspended with pay. But you’re not ready to take on feedback, Let’s leave it there

Salary Negotiator

dartboardio wrote: »

Thanks,
Unsure if I want the job tbh it seems 50/50 in my head. Then again the last couple of months I've been dreaming of switching jobs, then come Monday morning I'll go in and be like ah sure isn't this grand, I'll stay for another while, maybe that's just making the best of a bad thing, I don't really know.

I don't want to go on jobseekers but if I don't get a new job within the next week to 10 days, I will apply then.

Think I will just not return, as I feel pretty ashamed for doing it in the first place!

Great advice here anyway from most.

It was grand because you were avoiding the worst calls, had you not been ending those calls you probably would have moved on by now.

Still, I wouldn’t quit but I would start seriously looking for new employment whether you’re fired or not.

BDI

Why is everybody so angry, not just with me but with everyone. It’s a very on edge place.

anewme

Op, I've never worked in a call centre, but I've experienced one as I've occasionally had to take the calls that go upwards.

Call centres are a negative experience from the outset as people are phoning up because something is wrong, do you are seeing the worst in people.

Whether you see it or not, this will not have a positive impact on your overall wellbeing and could be why you are "switching off". It really is a thankless and harsh job.

OP, you are only 21 and have over 40 working years to go. Could you consider returning to further education or an apprenticeship and getting a qualification that does not restrict you to this or hospitality type of job?

Call centre pays okish money for your age, problem is there is no real uplift, so you could be getting caught in s vicious cycle. It is worth taking a step back go move forward.

Have you anyone you could speak to as a mentor, to work with and develop personally.

I would take this as a sign you are at a crossroads, use it as a positive to look again at what you want to do.

Atlantic Dawn

Atlantic Dawn wrote: »

Do you want the job? Having worked in a call centre many moons ago I know how pressurised it can be to maintain service levels and stats, could you not angle at the meeting that you were under pressure at the time and it won't happen again?

If you are sacked you will get jobseekers straight away, if you resign it will be 9 weeks.

You may be disqualified from getting Jobseeker's Benefit for 9 weeks if you:

Left work voluntarily and without a reasonable cause
Lost your job through misconduct
Refused an offer of suitable alternative employment or suitable training - if you have been on a penalty rate of JB for at least 21 days
Are aged under 55 and get a redundancy payment of more than €50,000. The exact length of your disqualification (up to 9 weeks) will depend on the amount of redundancy payment you received.

dartboardio

banie01 wrote: »

In a call centre environment you have commited gross misconduct.
Expect your call history to be trawled and every transfer and disconnect to be reviewed.

You will be fired, the entire functioning of the floor and the moral of staff in what can be an often oppressive environment is that we are all in it together, pulling the same way and facing the same shít.

You deliberately avoided that shít, disconnected a call and left a colleague facing a call where a customer is starting off with an additional issue of your making.

Thank you, I just seen this comment. This is what I would expect to happen, as I've only admitted to 3/4 instances of this, as that's all they pulled me on.

If they go back a few months they will see I've been doing it a few months, every so often.

Maybe I subconsciously did want to get fired, who knows.

- A lesson learned, don't think you can do as you please in work and get away with it.

And yes, I am aware I am disqualified from SW payments for 9 weeks if I leave due to gross misconduct, or resign.

Completely aware of all these facts.

The One Doctor

Go back to the job and see what happens. If you are fired, so be it. If you keep the job, keep your head down and find a new job in the next few months.

I've worked in call centres for years, they're ****e, frankly. I now work as a furniture restorer. Much better job satisfaction, not as much money.

TheIrishGrover

BDI wrote: »

A thread like this has popped up a few times. Is this a thing in call centres? All you have to do is answer the phone and speak. It’s actually heroic levels of laziness.

What is the company doing wrong that staff feel they can’t keep a headset on and speak to somebody about something they are trained to fix. Can you go to the meeting and help them understand what is going wrong with the place where staff are so demotivated. Could you ask for a change in role.

It sounds absolutely Dickensian that somebody would be so demotivated they couldn’t be arsed speaking on the phone. Are you lashing out?

You should go to the meeting to help them help the other employees. You could come in in your dressing gown and do that job like. Slippers on and coffee.

Spoken by someone who never worked with the public.

Because the public are a bunch of ###ts. Everyone should work with the public at some point in their lives.it would open their eyes.

Everyone says "not me. I'm perfectly nice". But having worked with the public I can confirm the public are a##holes. Working in these kind of jobs can be extremely stressful. How many times do you think someone calls style to just say everything is working OK and thanks for a job well done? No, when a person calls support its because the world has ended and its all the person on the phone's fault.

dartboardio

Salary Negotiator wrote: »

It was grand because you were avoiding the worst calls, had you not been ending those calls you probably would have moved on by now.

Still, I wouldn’t quit but I would start seriously looking for new employment whether you’re fired or not.

That's probably very true, had I not been able to get out of those awful calls I would probably be gone a few months ago when things started to go downhill

Sardonicat

dartboardio wrote: »

Thanks,
Unsure if I want the job tbh it seems 50/50 in my head. Then again the last couple of months I've been dreaming of switching jobs, then come Monday morning I'll go in and be like ah sure isn't this grand, I'll stay for another while, maybe that's just making the best of a bad thing, I don't really know.

I don't want to go on jobseekers but if I don't get a new job within the next week to 10 days, I will apply then.

Think I will just not return, as I feel pretty ashamed for doing it in the first place!

Great advice here anyway from most.

If you quit you will not get jobs eek erstwhile for 9 weeks and if you don't get a job within that time frame how will you survive?

You avoided the tough calls, you're avoiding the tough situation. All this is achieving is making a short term difficult situation into a long term intractable problem. You can't go through life dodging difficult situations. Oh, and if you think the meeting at work will be awkward just you wait til you have the meeting down the dole office with the deciding officer...

cannotlogin

I often wonder why I never manage to meet a perfect person in real life, when there are so many on boards!

OP, you don't need the lectures, you already know it was a bit mad.

If you do manage to keep your job, it will be most likely because someone fought to keep you. Don't prepay this but going back if you are going to do the same again or leave shortly anyway.

I would keep it brief and just say you want to apologise for your lack of professionalism and you understand it's unacceptable but that you realise that there are better ways of handling things and will do so in future jobs.

In the grand scheme of things, I don't think a job they had at 21 had much of a major impact on their live..

dartboardio

Sardonicat wrote: »

If you quit you will not get jobs eek erstwhile for 9 weeks and if you don't get a job within that time frame how will you survive?

You avoided the tough calls, you're avoiding the tough situation. All this is achieving is making a short term difficult situation into a long term intractable problem. You can't go through life dodging difficult situations. Oh, and if you think the meeting at work will be awkward just you wait til you have the meeting down the dole office with the deciding officer...

I have savings to cover this period so it's not that I was worried about, more so what to do.

I know, I realize that, and for some reason have a bad habit of making stupid decisions that affect things long term, obviously that's another days work but anyway

Peatys

dartboardio wrote: »

With all due respect to you, I think you're reading parts of the thread and ignoring others, just to get a rise.

I do have ongoing personal issues, which affected my attendance, yes, already admitted that, but that's nothing to do with why I've gotten suspended, that's due to me thinking I could get away with disconnecting calls when they weren't fully resolved.

I did not say 'I am lazy' earlier in the thread, I clearly stated call centre work can make you lazy, due to the environment, and maybe I should return to active work, like running around a restaurant, or cafe,
I've made a mistake and owned it, but you continue to come across as an undesirable with your snotty remarks.


Thanks anyway for trying to help!

By the way, I have accepted feedback and thanked other Boardsies.. maybe if you bothered to read it all you'd know

You've gotten all the decent advice you'll get from this thread.. best to unsub and let the trolls troll eachother.

banoffe2

Hi OP
I wish you the very best of luck
For now the fear of the unknown of the meeting is the single biggest hurdle for you
Regardless of what they have now planned, with the time and space they have had, its not that simple to fire or sack an employee, even with misconduct.
It would be great if you could find the courage to face them and see what they are offering you, then you could go back on a final warning or whatever the outcome and bide your time until you get something more suitable.

Its a risk, and you wont know if you dont go to the meeting, I would listen and hear them out, you dont have to respond or make any decision on the day, you can say I need time to think it through and that you will get back to them is a specific time frame?

There is no wrong or right answer for you OP.

strandroad

I'm not sure why you're even thinking about returning (provided that they allow it which seems unlikely if it's prolonged gross misconduct)? You will be under additional scrutiny or put on a performance improvement plan at a minimum, your get out of jail card is gone, and your coworkers might dislike you for dumping such calls on them.

I think that you should only go to the meeting to quit but try to smooth it over and negotiate a neutral reference.

Clareman

I don't know why yoyu wouldn't go in, how can they prove that you hung up on purpose all those times? Does their phone system track it and if it does why weren't you told this was being tracked

My advice, go in, don't admit anything. Best case scenario you keep your job while you look for a new 1, worst case scenario you lose your job but get paid in lieu of notice

Sardonicat

dartboardio wrote: »

I have savings to cover this period so it's not that I was worried about, more so what to do.

I know, I realize that, and for some reason have a bad habit of making stupid decisions that affect things long term, obviously that's another days work but anyway

Ah, okay. At least you won't be destitute and struggling til you get sorted. I'd echo the poster who said to view this as a crossroads in your life. I think you just want it to be over so you can start moving on. You're already checked out of that place mentally so I understand why you don't want to go back. I hope things start to look up for you soon.

beertons

What's to say the call wasn't ended on the other side?

strandroad

Clareman wrote: »

Does their phone system track it and if it does why weren't you told this was being tracked

All calls are recorded and occasionally monitored, it's part of the job you sign up for. Even if the OP argues that her phone malfunctioned so many times, she had a duty to report it at the time.

splinter65

punisher5112 wrote: »

Just be aware of you leave you are suspended from welfare payment....

Up.to you really whether you go back or not.

Maybe it's a good thing and give you the kick to move onto something better.

If he’s sacked then he’s possibly suspended anyway..

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

I’m also curious to know.. why would you randomly terminate a call, how can you tell if one customer is going to be more difficult than another?

splinter65

dartboardio wrote: »

I have savings to cover this period so it's not that I was worried about, more so what to do.

I know, I realize that, and for some reason have a bad habit of making stupid decisions that affect things long term, obviously that's another days work but anyway

I think around 18 months is the life cycle of a call centre employee before things start to nosedive. That’s about as much as anyone can take.
Look. Face into the meeting. Apologise and offer some explanation. You might get off with a warning. Then look for something else, a hotel or a restaurant so you can give in your notice and leave on your own terms. Best of luck

Salary Negotiator

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy wrote: »

I’m also curious to know.. why would you randomly terminate a call, how can you tell if one customer is going to be more difficult than another?

Experience.

Some calls you just know the person is going to kick off. Sometimes justifiably so and sometimes not.

HildaOgdenx

OP, I'm not going to advise you either way. I hope that things work out.

Just to say, you seem to have posted a lot of personal information on boards, and made yourself quite recognisable, (I imagine) should your employer or any potential future employers happen to read here. Entirely your prerogative, of course.

I don't doubt that call centres are tough places to work.
I hope that you find something else, and I'm sure you will.

All the best.

punisher5112

splinter65 wrote: »

If he’s sacked then he’s possibly suspended anyway..

No if you are let go it is different.

Bicyclette

Burnout is a trendy term at the moment. And it is quite conceivable you are/were suffering from burnout. Callcentres are known for causing burnout.

For what its worth, I would go back to the meeting, claim with hindsight you were suffering from burnout and apologise. Don't go back - but use the "burnout" as an excuse for your mistake and why you are looking for an alternative career.

It is quite conceivable that you may need a reference from your employers going forward. I would go through the polite motions with them just to end things with a level of civility.

Agent Smith

dartboardio wrote: »

Hi,

No judgement please. I know what I've done is ridiculous

Yesterday I got suspended from work for the week with pay because they noticed I had been disconnecting calls (I work in a call centre) I had been doing this for a few week/months every few days. They only know about six or seven occasions but suspended me so they could look further into it.

Obviously I admitted it straight away, and I'm embarrassed and ashamed.

They are having me back for a meeting next week to discuss the 'outcome' but in my eyes I'm just like, ah that's the job gone, I'm not going back to be told oh yeah we found you done that another 150 times heres your p45

Would you just never return and start looking for more jobs? Or have the balls to go in and do the outcome meeting?

PS. I was there two years

Do a Spacey on it...

Rob Thomas

Go to the meeting. It sucks now and it's not a nice feeling but the worrying is always worse than the event.

In time you will be glad you faced up to it. Whatever happens will happen and it's not going to define your life or career. You didn't steal anything or kill anyone so keep the chin up.

You are only 21, you sound like a very decent person who is keen to work and I think from some of your comments about self sabotage etc. maybe you are too hard on yourself. You have your whole life ahead of you.

But either way, I think you will probably be happier out of that role in the mid term. It doesn't sound like it challenges you and I think you have probably lost interest what with missing days and now dropping calls.

I genuinely wish you the very best of luck.