Indirect bullying

Dav010

Strumms wrote: »

Perhaps I’m not a senior manager because I’ve never applied for a Senior Managers job, I’m not a professional footballer either but I know a challenge worthy of a red card, I’m not a chef but I know a good spaghetti Carbonara, I’m not an F1 driver but.... :rolleyes:

You can’t drive? But seriously, all those things also require knowledge and talent.

Strumms

Dav010 wrote: »

You can’t drive? But seriously, all those things also require knowledge and talent.

So does reading, at a basic level anyway so go back and ‘try’ to read what I posted again, attempt a response that might add to the conversation, deep breaths and forget about acting like your best mate just stole your favorite Barbie.

beauf

WannaCry wrote: »

A coworker from another office has been trying to make me look bad constantly throughout my 6 months of working in a company, trying to make out that I am incompetent, stupid and cannot do the job. That person has been working for the company for over 15 years and is in a senior role while I am just a newbie. ....

You've been advised to keep your distance. That's good advice.

Also when completing tasks make sure you have the original task in writing, and if its not given write it yourself. Adding amendments if they are added. Include dates etc.

When the task is completed put it writing, and email this back to whom ever requested it, with a completed status beside everything in the original.

Personally I would not include the person your meant to be avoiding on any emails or communications. I'd just cut them out completely. I'd decline any work or projects they are involved in.

beauf

TBH the same advice works on boards. If someone insists on baiting with passive aggressive personal insults, just ignore them, and put them on your ignore list. Replying, just fuels their inner child.

beauf

OMM 0000 wrote: »

I'm not trying to be unsupportive, but...

Is it possible you're not doing a good job?

I've worked in management over 10 years and consistently I've noticed people are in denial about how poor they are at their jobs.

Typically when multiple people have a problem with how you do your job, that's a massive indicator they may be telling the truth.

I'm not saying the above to be harsh, I'm just trying to give an honest assessment.

Perhaps they are not good at their job. Perhaps though rather than telling the OP they are bad, some constructive advice might be more useful.

Quite often someone who is struggling on one team, get the reputation for not being great, is fine on another and thrives with different people.

Sometimes they need some instructions and mentoring on how to improve and better achieve whats expected of them.

Optimalprimerib

I would talk to him directly about it, ask him if he has an issue with what you are doing as you notice a bit of tension between the two of you.

He will either give you his issues directly in which you can then defend or he may back off for a while.

If it happens again, ask him again.

I have noticed in a few places, insecure people could feel threatened in their position, so they look to undermine another member of staff typically someone new or niave to make sure that they are not the worst one in the office.

OMM 0000

beauf wrote: »

Quite often someone who is struggling on one team, get the reputation for not being great, is fine on another and thrives with different people.

Sometimes they need some instructions and mentoring on how to improve and better achieve whats expected of them.

I agree with this, but the OP would be helping herself if she can drop the ego and accept there are things she needs to improve.

For example, she needs to manage her relationships better.

Another example, she needs to improve her communication skills.

Based on what she's written, it is unarguable she has issues in both those areas.

That mentality where you blame others for your problems... it doesn't work.

beauf

OMM 0000 wrote: »

I agree with this, but the OP would be helping herself if she can drop the ego and accept there are things she needs to improve.

For example, she needs to manage her relationships better.

Another example, she needs to improve her communication skills.

Based on what she's written, it is unarguable she has issues in both those areas.

That mentality where you blame others for your problems... it doesn't work.

I don't get the victim blaming here. This is a classic case of trying to harm someone's reputation and undermine someone. Especially more vindictive and calculated when that person is going well beyond their remit to do so.

Those kind of people are toxic and too often are let fester in an organisation by people either unable to see it, or unwilling to deal with it. This seems to be case here.

Seeing this a poor communication or ability by the victim is falling hook line and sinker for these scam artists. They feed on conflict. You need to isolate yourself from them, so they have nothing to feed on.

If you are managing one of these toxic people you need to get rid of them. At the minimum isolate them from whom they are picking on and turn up the scrutiny in their work so they are too busy to play the school yard bully like a child.

beauf

The op should certainly be proactive and be above reproach in their own work. But also be proactive and not rely on others to fix the problem. Work on getting moved to work or teams that have no interaction with the troublemaker.