Mental health and CoVid-19

dobman88

Irish Stones wrote: »

Fact is that even if a part of my mind says that I should be go out and have fun or do whatever pleases me, the other part of my head says that I should shut inside home, not see anyone, and let me rot away with my sadness or, like the NYT said a few weeks ago, my languishing.
Nothing teases me, at all, even those things that would make my life bright until the end of 2019.

I completely understand that. I've been through various periods in the last few months of not being able to leave my bed, let alone my house. Posted previously about my missus literally dragging me out of the bed during an episode I was having between xmas and new year when I spent 3 days solid in bed, no food no water nothing, just couldn't be bothered.

But if you can find the strength in you somewhere to get out of the house and do one of those things that used to make you happy, even for a short period of time to start small, you won't regret it and it could be the restart you need.

Best of luck.

GoneHome

dobman88 wrote: »

and txt me Friday morning to climb Carrantouhill, so we did. Clear skies all around, we could even see the Blasket Islands clearly, it was so perfect. Kate Kearneys just down the road from it were serving pints too so it was a perfect end to a great day.

What this man says is key to it, get out there and climb a mountain, do a cycle in your area, go for a swim in the local river, just anything to get out into nature and the great out doors. Today was a typical day for me, we got out for our first walk of the day at 7.30 a.m., lovely 3 mile walking in glorious sunshine, back home for a few hours of working from home and got a lovely 2 mile walk in after lunch, good for body and soul. I always say it, if more people got out into the fresh air everyday there would be far less "mental health" issues.

Lisha

GoneHome wrote: »

What this man says is key to it, get out there and climb a mountain, do a cycle in your area, go for a swim in the local river, just anything to get out into nature and the great out doors. Today was a typical day for me, we got out for our first walk of the day at 7.30 a.m., lovely 3 mile walking in glorious sunshine, back home for a few hours of working from home and got a lovely 2 mile walk in after lunch, good for body and soul. I always say it, if more people got out into the fresh air everyday there would be far less "mental health" issues.

God I only wish it was this simple. Fresh air is great. But it’s far from a magic bullet. I try so hard. No one knows that every step I take, every interaction I have with people is sheer torture for me. The constant anxiety I battle also comes with a perplexing, all encompassing sadness. I was always anxious but since Covid my mental health has fallen off a cliff. I keep moving forward try n Keep my kids life as normal and happy as possible. But it’s a battle. Yes I keep battling but it is so flucking hard. And it’s a lot more difficult than a glib go for a walk. Every time I meet people I’m scared that I’ve caught or have given them Covid. I’m scared with things easing that Covid will enter my kids school and then we must miss work for 2weeks. Scared than I’m asymptomatic and am spreading it like a modern day Typhoid Mary. Which makes no sense as Covid flattened me in March 2020. I know my parents are vaccinated and so even if they get it it will be ok. But I’m still scared. I keep doing all the things we can, keep the kids going in the allowed activities it is hard for me mentally. But we must keep going, brighter days are ahead, it is hard though.

GoneHome

Lisha wrote: »

Every time I meet people I’m scared that I’ve caught or have given them Covid.

Lord that's a sad outlook, for your own sake read up on the main stats on Covid, yes transmission is relatively simple but saying that if you're being careful in your hygiene practices, etc, you're being as safe as you can be. Saying that myself and my OH have been working from home with over a year and have been in very little contact with other people and have no notion to do so for at least another three months, I suppose at the end of the day it's an individual choice but by no means would I be letting it effect me as it appears to be getting to your good self.

Lisha

GoneHome wrote: »

Lord that's a sad outlook, for your own sake read up on the main stats on Covid, yes transmission is relatively simple but saying that if you're being careful in your hygiene practices, etc, you're being as safe as you can be. Saying that myself and my OH have been working from home with over a year and have been in very little contact with other people and have no notion to do so for at least another three months, I suppose at the end of the day it's an individual choice but by no means would I be letting it effect me as it appears to be getting to your good self.

Yes I know that logically but I don’t know where I caught it, or who I caught it from. So I don’t know how much contact I had with that person. If I knew where I got it from, the level of contact, I’d understand it more. I work in a very large work place where the hygiene is impeccable but we are near other people in work. And for a very long time I was the only confirmed case in a v large work place which was mortifing. So I’m constantly aware that I’m too near people. Kids are back in school now and back training which is wonderful but I’m conscious of meeting other people and I’m forever stepping back from people. And to be honest I love meeting people n chatting so I miss that. I miss popping into my friends houses but it will come again

PTH2009

Any free supports out there to deal with a few odd issues

Been feeling very down in myself since last monday when im seeing snapchats/facebook etc of friends all having garden drinks while i'm sitting at home. The '6 people' rule is always the excuse when i question it. What's worse is there talking about future events while im left out

I know you feel like a loner but when the pubs are open you feel a little better in yourself been out and about instead of sitting there like a fool while others are having get togethers with the so called 6 people rule

Any free platform i can text someone about how i'm feeling

eigrod

PTH2009 wrote: »

Any free supports out there to deal with a few odd issues

Been feeling very down in myself since last monday when im seeing snapchats/facebook etc of friends all having garden drinks while i'm sitting at home. The '6 people' rule is always the excuse when i question it. What's worse is there talking about future events while im left out

I know you feel like a loner but when the pubs are open you feel a little better in yourself been out and about instead of sitting there like a fool while others are having get togethers with the so called 6 people rule

Any free platform i can text someone about how i'm feeling

Loads on the first page of this very thread.

elizunia87

I texted here couple months back. I was depressed of seeing the same walls of the house, going to the same parks. I went to home to see my old Parents, seeing doctors, went to Mallorca which was amazing. I am not gonna be in this prisoner Anymore. Now life is better

december2019

Will life ever go back to normal?
Now I know we’re lucky to have vaccines, numbers improving, businesses reopening, etc.
I’m just wondering will we ever go back to what life used be like?
Just walking into a shop in a crowd.
24 hour McDonald’s.
Cinema.
Crowds at events such a parties and big scale events.
Or will we be wondering around in masks, queuing up for years.

I’ve tried to ask this to people and it’s often a patronizing answer you get. Your basically told I don’t miss crowds or events. I’ve enough enjoying the nature around me and I enjoy wearing my mask. Not to be rude but I’m not looking for one of those answers.

Irish Stones

december2019 wrote: »

Will life ever go back to normal?
Now I know we’re lucky to have vaccines, numbers improving, businesses reopening, etc.
I’m just wondering will we ever go back to what life used be like?
Just walking into a shop in a crowd.
24 hour McDonald’s.
Cinema.
Crowds at events such a parties and big scale events.
Or will we be wondering around in masks, queuing up for years.

I’ve tried to ask this to people and it’s often a patronizing answer you get. Your basically told I don’t miss crowds or events. I’ve enough enjoying the nature around me and I enjoy wearing my mask. Not to be rude but I’m not looking for one of those answers.

My opinion is that we'll never go back to the life we used to have. Our next lifestyle will be different, unavoidably conditioned by what we have expereinced in the last year and a half (and who knows how long it will still be).
What I foresee is that people will be warier of who they have next to them and for a long time they will think the person close to them might be the carrier of something still unknown.
Someone will wear the mask in public where there's crowd, just in case, so this landscape of masked face won't disappear for good.
Also, I believe that temperature scanning, sanitizing gels, and health passes will be the norm.
Unfortunately...

PTH2009

I think things will have to go back to normal sometime in terms of events

No way can they just say 'OK no more big crowds in stadiums, Arenas and the likes

Tell me how

december2019 wrote: »

Will life ever go back to normal?
Now I know we’re lucky to have vaccines, numbers improving, businesses reopening, etc.
I’m just wondering will we ever go back to what life used be like?
Just walking into a shop in a crowd.
24 hour McDonald’s.
Cinema.
Crowds at events such a parties and big scale events.
Or will we be wondering around in masks, queuing up for years.

I’ve tried to ask this to people and it’s often a patronizing answer you get. Your basically told I don’t miss crowds or events. I’ve enough enjoying the nature around me and I enjoy wearing my mask. Not to be rude but I’m not looking for one of those answers.

Well, not to be rude, but when you ask someone a question, they are entitled to answer how they see fit. Or you should really go out of your way to make it a leading question so as to get the answer you want. If you assumme that the people who you asked answered honestly, then it might be worth noting that many people have appreciated the fact that life has been moving at a less intense and frantic pace than it did up until before Covid.

My answer to your question? Yes, most definitely we will get back to what we might consider normal. To a certain degree, but I expect it will be a new normal. I think we can expect that we will forever see a number of people on a daily basis wearing masks. This might be because they are immuno-suppressed or have a touch of a head cold or something themselves and don't want to spread it. the last year has familiarised all of us with this concept which people in Asian countries have been doing for many years (they have the added concerns of dangerous levels of pollution to consider also of course).

But in terms of cinema's, crowds, gigs, all of that. Then yes, they will definitely return largely because they were fun in the first place. But again, there might be caveats, the 'standing room' only crowd just might not be something people are willing to tolerate as they did in the past when even then many would have said that the motivation for some such occasions was a sense that if you weren't in the middle of it like on New Years eve or something that you were missing out.

On the other side of the coin, I expect that we might see things grow to a place where we are seeing more crowds than we were in 2018, 2019 for example, as people look to make up for time lost last year. i would hope that cafe's restaurants, bars, cinema's other public spaces and so on would be looking at an extended period of prosperity for this reason.

One thing that I thing we should see, but I'm not too hopeful that we do, is a fluidity in dealing with things. If there is an outbreak, whether it be a particularly virulent seasonal flu or a strain of Covid, that we move to deal with it quickly and appropriately for a very short period in an effort to quell it. This could be anything from a company advising people work from home for a week if a number of people pick up the flu, or an event being postponed/cancelled because there is a risk of a couple of cases of Covid (or whatever) becoming a much bigger problem. Both of these concepts might be annoying or depressing to consider, but we can't ignore the fact that taking the appropriate measures is the best thing to do rather than assuming the problem will just go away. And i would hope this kind of alert and proactive behaviour could prevent more serious types of 'lock downs' having to be considered.

Covid could be explained with the analogy of a car crash, it happened suddenly (relatively speaking) had dramatic, and often tragic effects, took a long time to clean up and repair the damage and while lessons should be learned to prevent it happening, before long, people will probably carry on like they have forgotten about it.

december2019

december2019 wrote: »

Will life ever go back to normal?
Now I know we’re lucky to have vaccines, numbers improving, businesses reopening, etc.
I’m just wondering will we ever go back to what life used be like?
Just walking into a shop in a crowd.
24 hour McDonald’s.
Cinema.
Crowds at events such a parties and big scale events.
Or will we be wondering around in masks, queuing up for years.

I’ve tried to ask this to people and it’s often a patronizing answer you get. Your basically told I don’t miss crowds or events. I’ve enough enjoying the nature around me and I enjoy wearing my mask. Not to be rude but I’m not looking for one of those answers.

Normality will certainly return. Look at the huge queue's to go to places like Penney's, Ikea or pubs if they are allowed to open.

Most people are sick of all this nonsense. Get the jabs into arms and thats that.

If people are still afraid, they can lock themselves away if they choose.

Irish Stones

Deleted User wrote: »

Normality will certainly return. Look at the huge queue's to go to places like Penney's, Ikea or pubs if they are allowed to open.

Most people are sick of all this nonsense. Get the jabs into arms and thats that.

If people are still afraid, they can lock themselves away if they choose.

Don't you think that the memory of what we have been through will haunt us forever? After all it hasn't been one day or one week, it's been two years at least. This kind of things leaves traces in the minds of people, it can't be erased.
We'll always be thinking of what kind of hell we've been through.
At least I will. I just can't see myself be the same as before. I can't find any joy in the life anymore, and I'm sure I never will.

Irish Stones

dobman88 wrote: »

But if you can find the strength in you somewhere to get out of the house and do one of those things that used to make you happy, even for a short period of time to start small, you won't regret it and it could be the restart you need.

I though of your words for a few days, and I can't find the will to go out, because the world outside is unusual, upset, not what I remember.
I don't want to carry in my mind scenes where the world I knew is different, I'd rather stay home and pretend that outside it's just as it was. Should I see the reality, how could I unsee it?

dobman88

december2019 wrote: »

Will life ever go back to normal?
Now I know we’re lucky to have vaccines, numbers improving, businesses reopening, etc.
I’m just wondering will we ever go back to what life used be like?
Just walking into a shop in a crowd.
24 hour McDonald’s.
Cinema.
Crowds at events such a parties and big scale events.
Or will we be wondering around in masks, queuing up for years.

I’ve tried to ask this to people and it’s often a patronizing answer you get. Your basically told I don’t miss crowds or events. I’ve enough enjoying the nature around me and I enjoy wearing my mask. Not to be rude but I’m not looking for one of those answers.

I go through phases of optimism and pessimism. I'm in an optimistic mind set at the moment and I think this virus will be treated like we treat the influenza virus. There will be shots availbale for those who want them and things will be as they were before. It's just too much of an unknown quantity to do it right now.

The novelty of lockdown has definitely worn off. I lost my job permanently but I went back to college as a mature student so it kind of worked out well.

I was always an outdoor person anyway so the only thing that annoyed me was I didn't get home as often as I liked to go hiking, swimming, kayaking etc. But overall, when I look at how things have panned out, I haven't had it as bad as others but I just hated being trapped in my own head.

We will get back to normal, I think 2021 is a write off but 2022 we will start seeing things go back to how they were.

starkid

Was loving wfh and the calm it gave me from episodes of depression and a kind of manic hype when in office.

The last few weeks im really starting to notice my tinnitus and body pains, and suddenly i feel much more panicky and weird feelings of anixiety (have had depression and feelings of that sort for over 20 years, but never full blown symptoms of panic and impending doom unless i was drinking too much) Only other ever episodes i had were at night waking up in panic. Now i'm starting to feel this during the day wfh. First time i noticed was last summer having started wfh in March. Went to a and e after a pretty bad episode. Got the all clear on ecg and bloods.

Going for a full check up on the 31st but now i feel i'm either getting MS or i'm going nuts. Drinking less than i did going to office, but drinking more than i want or should.

I wonder has WFH given me sort of feedback loop, internalizing too much, no distractions and now its actually starting to have real effects on my mental health, having sort of just supressed that for years (in john gods age 17, lexapro in the past but never a true feeling of losing it mentally).

I hate my job, my office and don't want to return but i'm guessing it was a distraction of sorts.

dobman88

Irish Stones wrote: »

I though of your words for a few days, and I can't find the will to go out, because the world outside is unusual, upset, not what I remember.
I don't want to carry in my mind scenes where the world I knew is different, I'd rather stay home and pretend that outside it's just as it was. Should I see the reality, how could I unsee it?

That fair enough and I understand everyone is battling their own demons. I wont try to patronise you so I'll just wish you the best and hope things improve for you.

Irish Stones

dobman88 wrote: »

That fair enough and I understand everyone is battling their own demons. I wont try to patronise you so I'll just wish you the best and hope things improve for you.

Absolutely, I wish to thank you for your advice and words of encouragement. Maybe one day I will ready to see the world outside, but not now.
Sometimes I think of my life now like a broken toy. You can fix it nearly as new, but you'll always know it has been fixed, you can play with it, but every now and then your mind will tell you the toy was broken and now it has been fixed. You won't ever look at it with the same passion.

december2019

december2019 wrote: »

Will life ever go back to normal?
Now I know we’re lucky to have vaccines, numbers improving, businesses reopening, etc.
I’m just wondering will we ever go back to what life used be like?
Just walking into a shop in a crowd.
24 hour McDonald’s.
Cinema.
Crowds at events such a parties and big scale events.
Or will we be wondering around in masks, queuing up for years.

I’ve tried to ask this to people and it’s often a patronizing answer you get. Your basically told I don’t miss crowds or events. I’ve enough enjoying the nature around me and I enjoy wearing my mask. Not to be rude but I’m not looking for one of those answers.

I believe life will return to how it was pre Covid. Everything that was will be again. I think it will be a very gradual return however and I don't foresee it being in 2022. Certainly much of our old lives will be back then but the rest will take time.

Sadly I feel the pandemic has broken something in this country. We were becoming increasingly isolated from each other anyways but now there will be fear and paranoia present too.

It's been a hell of a time and I will rush headlong back to freedom and choice and living.

ClosedAccountFuzzy

It’s certainly broken my social life. I basically don’t have one anymore and I don’t think it’s going to be easy to restore it.

I’m only holding myself together by a thread at the moment, with the promise of vaccines being an end to this, but honestly my life has been derailed in ways I don’t think I could even have imagined.

I know people are going on about how it’s a simpler life, but it’s like life stopped.

I’m also not really using the pandemic to add extra degrees or qualifications and it’s been stressing me out that I haven’t. I tried to start new projects and they just crumbled. It’s like I’ve no concentration and I’m being very critical of myself about that. I should be able to do more.

Then I’m having serious issues with my back, so things like walks and all of that outdoors stuff isn’t happening. I can’t even get from the car to the supermarket without serious pain.

I haven’t even been in the city centre for nearly two months at this stage.

My plans to go abroad and basically everything are just not even on the agenda anymore.

I was thinking the other day, if I won the lottery, I wouldn’t even see the point anymore. It’s not like you could go anywhere or do anything interesting.

I know it’s not WW2 or something and these are “first world problems” but it’s still a mess.

leahyl

FuzzyThinking wrote: »

It’s certainly broken my social life. I basically don’t have one anymore and I don’t think it’s going to be easy to restore it.

I’m only holding myself together by a thread at the moment, with the promise of vaccines being an end to this, but honestly my life has been derailed in ways I don’t think I could even have imagined.

I know people are going on about how it’s a simpler life, but it’s like life stopped.

I’m also not really using the pandemic to add extra degrees or qualifications and it’s been stressing me out that I haven’t. I tried to start new projects and they just crumbled. It’s like I’ve no concentration and I’m being very critical of myself about that. I should be able to do more.

Then I’m having serious issues with my back, so things like walks and all of that outdoors stuff isn’t happening. I can’t even get from the car to the supermarket without serious pain.

I haven’t even been in the city centre for nearly two months at this stage.

My plans to go abroad and basically everything are just not even on the agenda anymore.

I was thinking the other day, if I won the lottery, I wouldn’t even see the point anymore. It’s not like you could go anywhere or do anything interesting.

I know it’s not WW2 or something and these are “first world problems” but it’s still a mess.

I totally understand where you are coming from. You are definitely being very hard on yourself. It has affected everyone in some way. I see myself in a lot of what you said, in terms of being critical of myself and thinking I shouldn't be complaining as they are just "first world problems" but it's all relative. Everyones problems are their own. Try to be kinder to yourself.

I've definitely started finding things to be more difficult. As things start to open up, I really don't have anyone I know in the area to meet up with beyond my family. I'm vaccinated but nothing to do with the freedom tbh. On top of that, house hunting is discouraging. Went to gp and anti depressants have been raised for first time in a long time. So hopefully that'll settle me.

leahyl

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I've definitely started finding things to be more difficult. As things start to open up, I really don't have anyone I know in the area to meet up with beyond my family. I'm vaccinated but nothing to do with the freedom tbh. On top of that, house hunting is discouraging. Went to gp and anti depressants have been raised for first time in a long time. So hopefully that'll settle me.

I hear ya with the house hunting - soul destroying stuff.

Irish Stones

FuzzyThinking wrote: »

It’s certainly broken my social life. I basically don’t have one anymore and I don’t think it’s going to be easy to restore it.

I’m only holding myself together by a thread at the moment, with the promise of vaccines being an end to this, but honestly my life has been derailed in ways I don’t think I could even have imagined.

I know people are going on about how it’s a simpler life, but it’s like life stopped.

I’m also not really using the pandemic to add extra degrees or qualifications and it’s been stressing me out that I haven’t. I tried to start new projects and they just crumbled. It’s like I’ve no concentration and I’m being very critical of myself about that. I should be able to do more.

Then I’m having serious issues with my back, so things like walks and all of that outdoors stuff isn’t happening. I can’t even get from the car to the supermarket without serious pain.

I haven’t even been in the city centre for nearly two months at this stage.

My plans to go abroad and basically everything are just not even on the agenda anymore.

I was thinking the other day, if I won the lottery, I wouldn’t even see the point anymore. It’s not like you could go anywhere or do anything interesting.

I know it’s not WW2 or something and these are “first world problems” but it’s still a mess.

I think you described most of the way I'm feeling.
No interests in anything, all plans to do something have been put on the back burner, I have nearly no priorities at all.
And, like you, if I won the lottery, I wouldn't even rejoice, because I wouldn't know what to do with that money.
I even think I won't ever come out of this, life has been stopped and one day it will restart, but that pause will have consequences on how I will live.
As I had said in another post, it's like a broken toy. You can fix it and play with it again, but you'll always know it was broken and fixed.

PTH2009

The 6 person rule for pubs/social activities is very bad as its making people exclude others. This rule has hit me hard personally and its not just about the drink, its more the social aspects and not sitting alone

It can be quite humiliating and frustrating if your turned away from pub to pub because there's no room or they wont take ya cause you'll take up a 6 person table

speckle

PTH2009 wrote: »

The 6 person rule for pubs/social activities is very bad as its making people exclude others. This rule has hit me hard personally and its not just about the drink, its more the social aspects and not sitting alone

Just posted about that and how discrimnatory it it is on restrictions thread...feel for you and others who are single or have no kids or live far away from family or friends or are new to the country..

I used to love a quiet drink in the middle of the week by myself. It's one of the things I miss. It's not nice to feel excluded by these measures. I do recall during the last easing some pubs had their bar set up that one or two people could sit at it. It was perfect for people on their own.
I haven't ventured in to a pub alone since pre Covid but I do think the right kind of place will accommodate you.

dobman88

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I used to love a quiet drink in the middle of the week by myself. It's one of the things I miss. It's not nice to feel excluded by these measures. I do recall during the last easing some pubs had their bar set up that one or two people could sit at it. It was perfect for people on their own.
I haven't ventured in to a pub alone since pre Covid but I do think the right kind of place will accommodate you.

I'd hope so. I know my local will. Like you, I love just popping down for 2 or 3 pints of a random evening. Sometimes just to find my own corner to sit or sometimes you'd meet someone and strike up a conversation for an hour or so.

I was never a big drinker but must admit I've missed the pubs.

dobman88

dobman88 wrote: »

I'd hope so. I know my local will. Like you, I love just popping down for 2 or 3 pints of a random evening. Sometimes just to find my own corner to sit or sometimes you'd meet someone and strike up a conversation for an hour or so.

I was never a big drinker but must admit I've missed the pubs.

Yes it was exactly like that for me. Even if I wasn't haven't a drink there were some lovely little spots I'd go in to for tea and to have a chat with some of the characters there.
Those times will return for us.