Cost of funeral

splinter65

olestoepoke wrote: »

Why would you need to use any buildings except you own living room?

If all the friends, family, colleagues and neighbours that would wish to offer your loved ones comfort on the occasion of your death can fit in your sitting room then that’ll be fine.

olestoepoke

splinter65 wrote: »

You classed the priest as an “extravagance” in an earlier post. You brought religion into the thread. The way some atheists are inclined to do....
I’ve been making the argument that he’s not an extravagance. No one is suggesting that you would want a priest. You’ve told us 3 or 4 times now that you’re an atheist, the way some atheists are inclined to do.....

Whether or not you think €400 is an extravagance is subjective. I live in Dublin so that's what it costs on average. I brought religion into this because religion has a large part to play in most funerals and at €400+ is considerable part of the costs. I said that I was an athesist once and implied that I was a non-believer to make the point that I personally would have no need for a priest but you can exaggerate that a little to suit your narrative the way some people like you are inclined to do.....

Cupatae

costacorta wrote: »

And if you need to buy a grave add another €1000 min to €1800 on top of that plus I see a lot of funerals nowadays come with being invited back fora meal afterwards so that would bring funeral bill to 15k ..

15 grand for a funeral? fire me in a ditch and throw a few shovels over me when im done anyway thats ridiculous.

Spanish Eyes

Flowers are gone now, it's just family flowers only mostly now.

Anyway, the undertakers are one of the few businesses that are surviving, sorry for the pun.

splinter65

olestoepoke wrote: »

Whether or not you think €400 is an extravagance is subjective. I live in Dublin so that's what it costs on average. I brought religion into this because religion has a large part to play in most funerals and at €400+ is considerable part of the costs. I said that I was an athesist once and implied that I was a non-believer to make the point that I personally would have no need for a priest but you can exaggerate that a little to suit your narrative the way some people like you are inclined to do.....

Yes. Without the actual building that is the church to have the gathering in, and without the priest to officiate over the proceedings, most people would have to book a venue to gather mourners in, and engage a celebrant to be MC.
Neither of these things are cheap and will certainly come to much more then €400 yet the church can provide both for that.
A huge part of the whole proceeding, yet accounts only for less then 20% of the entire cost.

salmocab

Cupatae wrote: »

15 grand for a funeral? fire me in a ditch and throw a few shovels over me when im done anyway thats ridiculous.

It’s like weddings to be fair, lots of extras if you want but the person is just as dead at the end.
Just like weddings though who is anyone else to judge how much was spent.

Addle

A rural funeral didn’t cost us that much, even going for a meal after and picking a relatively expensive coffin (not a casket).
OT, but Irish funerals are about the bereaved, not the deceased. Personally, and I’m not religious, I got a lot of relief out of sharing my grief and receiving the respects of many. Can’t put a price on that.

Addle

Addle wrote: »

How did you arrange that license?

olestoepoke wrote: »

What licence?

I wasn’t aware of that type of graveyard.
I like it, but it is more expensive than a double plot in my home (country) graveyard.

Cupatae

salmocab wrote: »

It’s like weddings to be fair, lots of extras if you want but the person is just as dead at the end.
Just like weddings though who is anyone else to judge how much was spent.

Yeah except you dont have to get married. You have to die, im not judging.. as much as i know about em is what i read in this thread thank god.. But if 15k is the average.. id imagine that most would struggle.

AulWan

We have made advance funeral arrangements for my parents, and for a one day funeral, with one car, including opening of the grave (already owned) was approx €6600. This is in Dublin. This plan was made 3 years ago, so possibly add a bit onto that now.

Its all the little costs that add up, like the charges for opening a grave etc.

<snip>

salmocab

Cupatae wrote: »

Yeah except you dont have to get married. You have to die, im not judging.. as much as i know about em is what i read in this thread thank god.. But if 15k is the average.. id imagine that most would struggle.

15k is certainly not the average. If you look at what people have posted 6k for the funeral and I can’t see anymore than a few hundred on some sambos and soup back at the pub. Id say most people are spending 7-8k which is still a lot of money but I’d say some people like to give someone the send off they deserve.

Spanish Eyes

AulWan wrote: »

We have made advance funeral arrangements for my parents, and for a one day funeral, with one car, including opening of the grave (already owned) was approx €6600. This is in Dublin. This plan was made 3 years ago, so possibly add a bit onto that now.

Its all the little costs that add up, like the charges for opening a grave etc.

I could send you a copy of the breakdown with the names blanked out, if you pm me an email address.

Did your parents have a say in all this?

I don't doubt your care for them, but just wondered.

Rows Grower

salmocab wrote: »

15k is certainly not the average. If you look at what people have posted 6k for the funeral and I can’t see anymore than a few hundred on some sambos and soup back at the pub. Id say most people are spending 7-8k which is still a lot of money but I’d say some people like to give someone the send off they deserve.

Hopefully those days will be back again soon, I much prefer them to the sit down 3-4 course meal in hotels with a free bar that seemed to have gained traction in the last 10 years.

salmocab

Rows Grower wrote: »

Hopefully those days will be back again soon, I much prefer them to the sit down 3-4 course meal in hotels with a free bar that seemed to have gained traction in the last 10 years.

I’ve been to a good few over the years and never a sit down meal, yeah I’d much prefer a sambo and a pint in the pub.

costacorta

salmocab wrote: »

15k is certainly not the average. If you look at what people have posted 6k for the funeral and I can’t see anymore than a few hundred on some sambos and soup back at the pub. Id say most people are spending 7-8k which is still a lot of money but I’d say some people like to give someone the send off they deserve.

I never said 15k is average as I’d say 8k is avarage . I was saying if you add on a sit down meal for 150-200 people in local hotel with a drink and if you need to buy the plot which on average is another 1k you wouldn’t have much change from 15k .. I can only speak of an aunts funeral last year and I seen the bill and it was just over 8k in cork county and no plot involved as already had one ..

salmocab

costacorta wrote: »

I never said 15k is average as I’d say 8k is avarage . I was saying if you add on a sit down meal for 150-200 people in local hotel with a drink and if you need to buy the plot which on average is another 1k you wouldn’t have much change from 15k .. I can only speak of an aunts funeral last year and I seen the bill and it was just over 8k in cork county and no plot involved as already had one ..

I didn’t claim you said it was or indeed even quote you at all.

maestroamado

salmocab wrote: »

It’s like weddings to be fair, lots of extras if you want but the person is just as dead at the end.
Just like weddings though who is anyone else to judge how much was spent.

How would it be like a wedding?
When you go to a wedding you have to buy the rags, the norm €200/300 gift and at least €100 for fanta...
Now a funeral, go as you please free dinner and some of the black stuff for the thirst and €50 do the day.


I have a friend who undertaker/pub. One night we decided to have a late one and funerals cost came up, i asked him if we could pay installment/advance.
He said sure you can start now.

splinter65

salmocab wrote: »

I’ve been to a good few over the years and never a sit down meal, yeah I’d much prefer a sambo and a pint in the pub.

My friend had a sit down meal in a hotel after her MIL funeral in February there.
Now it was very ordinary beef or salmon, potatoes and two veg followed by tea or coffee and biscuits and there were only 30 people on a very cold day but some of those had drove a long way.

splinter65

AulWan wrote: »

Yes, these were their wishes as discussed with them. They're both still alive, by the way!

I figured I could just cut and paste the details here:

To Professional Services, Administration and Co-ordination
of the Funeral Arrangements, and supply of the following:

• Veneer Mahogany Coffin, Raised Lid, Figured Sides, Brass Bar Handles.
  
• Hearse and Bearers: Removal from place of death to our Funeral Home.
• Preparation and Dressing.
  
• Hearse, Bearers and one Limousine: Removal to XXXXXXX and thence Funeral to XXXXXXXX Cemetery.

€4,525.00

DISBURSEMENTS:

• XXXXX Cemetery: Grave Opening Fees. 460.00
• South Dublin County Council Fees. 460.00
• Obituary Notice in Evening Herald Newspaper and RIP.ie. 190.00
• Soloist Fees. 130.00
• Organist Fees. 130.00
• Church Offering: 200.00
• Gratuities: Gravediggers and Church Sexton. 100.00
• Total €6,195.00

Note this didn't include flowers, which as discussed with the funeral director, would be another €400 if they arranged them. He gave me the name of a florist with a nod and a wink, who does them for €100.

As I said, this is a little over 3 years old now, so I would possible add another €1000 onto the cost? (eta) doesn't include afters either, but it would be a soup/sandwich in a local hostelry, and buy your own drink. Definitely not a full sit down meal. I've never been at a funeral with a sit down meal?

Thanks for that. Very informative for posters who really don’t understand the amount of work that undertakers get through in one funeral.

costacorta

splinter65 wrote: »

My friend had a sit down meal in a hotel after her MIL funeral in February there.
Now it was very ordinary beef or salmon, potatoes and two veg followed by tea or coffee and biscuits and there were only 30 people on a very cold day but some of those had drove a long way.

I have been at a few in last couple of yrs with a 4 course meal and over 150 people at them. I myself would not want my family to have it as it’s a big expense on top of funeral but I suppose it depends on what people can afford

Spanish Eyes

AulWan wrote: »

Yes, these were their wishes as discussed with them. They're both still alive, by the way!

I figured I could just cut and paste the details here:

(eta) doesn't include afters either, but it would be a soup/sandwich in a local hostelry, and buy your own drink. Definitely not a full sit down meal. I've never been at a funeral with a sit down meal?

Well at my Dad and Mam's funeral there was a gathering (bad word now) and a buffet meal. Drinks on the house for the first hour or so, nod to the hostillery. They know the score.

Nowadays, not happening anymore.

antix80

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I'm atheist, too. However, if I end up using their buildings or services, I would pay for the use of them.

Are you a vegan too? Or is there anything else you'd like us to know?

antix80

AulWan wrote: »

I figured I could just cut and paste the details here:

Very informative.

The fees are reasonable for a professional service.

Personally, I'd be happy with a closed cardboard coffin and a glade airfreshner. I've a mate with a land rover who can arrange transport.

salmocab

maestroamado wrote: »

How would it be like a wedding?
When you go to a wedding you have to buy the rags, the norm €200/300 gift and at least €100 for fanta...
Now a funeral, go as you please free dinner and some of the black stuff for the thirst and €50 do the day.


I have a friend who undertaker/pub. One night we decided to have a late one and funerals cost came up, i asked him if we could pay installment/advance.
He said sure you can start now.

I wasn’t talking about attending a wedding or Funeral I meant you could pay as much or as little as you wanted with the same result, either married or buried/cremated from the person who’s paying point of view.

splinter65

Just wanted to add that if you’ve got a funeral bill you can’t manage you can go to the CWO to enquire about help but prepare to be means tested. They’re not interested in flowers or refreshments either.
Also if you find yourself in charge of organising an unexpected funeral beware of extended family making helpful suggestions about what the bereaved would have wanted as they will be nowhere to be found when the bill for the American style silk lined casket in a glass hearse drawn by 4 black plumed horses drops in the letterbox.

AulWan

splinter65 wrote: »

Also if you find yourself in charge of organising an unexpected funeral beware of extended family making helpful suggestions about what the bereaved would have wanted as they will be nowhere to be found when the bill for the American style silk lined casket in a glass hearse drawn by 4 black plumed horses drops in the letterbox.

This is a big part of the reason why we made advance arrangements, even down to which coffin they prefer.

No confusion when the time comes.

wiggle16

Mod note:

As the OP's question appears to have been answered, I am going to close this thread.

Thanks & grma all who posted.

Take care OP.

Thread locked.