How to Own A decision

LegacyUser

Im in a job i dont particularly relish at the minute. On paper its a good job:
- Good pay
- Good benefits
- Mostly good co-wokers

Its a fairly flat org however, and besides dead mans boots, there is no room for me to grow.
Management is a little too easy going, and meaning i end up quite randomized with lots of work and the real issue, lots of context switching which is draining.

To get the same benefits and salary anywhere else however would require much more responsibility and probably a lot more time at work or travelling.

I have a young family, who i enjoy spending time with, so Ive decided that for the moment, to stay here, enjoy the good benefits, ignore lack of progression and stay here.

My issue is although i know this to be the correct decision, work still grates on me tremendously at times, affecting my mood. I know the issue is i need to accept my decision to stay for the time being and get on with enjoying my family, but im struggling with this part.

Anyone got any advice?

leggo

I imagine a lot feel the same as you OP. Most people work in their jobs because it was the best available option at the time, rather than the culmination of a long-term goal, and they’re comfortable.

The way to make this truly sit well with you in the mid/long-term is to start at the top and go from there. What do you want from life? Don’t retrofit your current situation and analyse from what’s realistic/possible right now. See it as a thought exercise and remove restrictions. Do you want a job that you feel passionate about and appreciated each day and would that be worth taking a slight paycut for? Or do you want a comfortable life outside of work with a ****ton of money and the work itself doesn’t really matter? Or do you want a balance of both: a grand job that doesn’t ask too much of you and allows you space to spend time with your family? Really think about all 3 options, and any others you can think of yourself, the pros/cons and what your day to day life would be like. Ask yourself which thought makes you happiest.

Then the simple answer is to go for whichever option you like the most. If you still fall on your current situation, you’ll be truly comfortable in that. If you decide you want the job you’re passionate about, you’ll make the financial side work from it (if you think you aren’t then consider that 2020 has taught us all that we can make previously unthinkable scenarios work) and are in a good spot to look around coming from being employed currently. If you want the money one, then at least you know and can start setting the wheels in motion.

Whatever the case this niggling feeling is almost definitely a sign that you’re not listening to your needs and wants. So listen for a while, see what they have to say. You don’t need to do anything more with that. But once you listen you will and it’ll seem natural then, plus I’d put money on the mental benefits being almost instantaneous from just getting that clarity in your own mind.

Curious1002

I will add maybe one thing - dont quit your job but jump ships. Simply look for a better position elsewhere. It's probably not the greatest time to look for a job but live with the thought that it's just a matter of time and you will be gone from there. You will either find a really nice position and your will negotiate nice agreement as you are coming from a position of "power" (you already have a job so your approach is completely different to people who are unemployed - they, sadly, dont shine, they appear a bit desperate for the job and they settle just for the sake of getting one. I am talking from my own experience here). You can pick and choose, you can afford to be picky and choosy, they dont.
On the other hand, if you search the market and there is actually nothing attractive you may realise that your current job is not really that bad and you will be grateful to have it. Either way, start searching, explore, check the market, go for a few interviews, text waters, practice selling yourself high, see how it's like - when the perfect job comes along you will know it straight away - you will get shivers on your spine and wont be able to sleep a day before the interview and then 3 nights after.