Dining out during a pandemic

Lolamontez

I'm 31weeks pregnant and have been asked out for lunch with family this weekend at a relatively busy restaurant . Aside from grocery shopping with a mask on, I have not mixed much socially nor had a take away let alone go for a meal. Am I being OTT in declining an invite?
If I wasn't pregnant I would feel differently about the situation however its with my husband and his family and let's just say he's none too pleased at the moment that I am not all for attending.

Plumbthedepths

Lolamontez wrote: »

I'm 31weeks pregnant and have been asked out for lunch with family this weekend at a relatively busy restaurant . Aside from grocery shopping with a mask on, I have not mixed much socially nor had a take away let alone go for a meal. Am I being OTT in declining an invite?
If I wasn't pregnant I would feel differently about the situation however its with my husband and his family and let's just say he's none too pleased at the moment that I am not all for attending.

Do what feels right for you. If you are not comfortable politely decline. As for your husband ( I'm male and married 28 years) tell him to cop on, your pregnancy is your number 1 concern.

Dial Hard

Your husband is perfectly free to attend without you if he wants to go and you don't.

Do what feels right for you.

annoyedgal

Yep agree with everyone who said do whatever makes you feel comfortable.
I'm 28 weeks and have eaten out a few times. Felt very comfortable in all but one reataurant as was hard to socially distance and staff not wearing masks. Felt very comfortable in the other places.
I think if you've been super cautious it can be very hard and stressful to step out of the safe bubble. I was pretty anxious the first time i met up with friends or went to a shopping centre but doing these things made me realise you can do them relatively safely with a mask and distancing. And it felt good to do some normal things! But you have to go with your comfort level and don't feel bad about refusing.

Lolamontez

Plumbthedepths wrote: »

Do what feels right for you. If you are not comfortable politely decline. As for your husband ( I'm male and married 28 years) tell him to cop on, your pregnancy is your number 1 concern.

Thanks Plumbthedepths for responding to my thread, deep down I don't feel comfortable and like you say I have a duty of care to the baby as my number 1 concern. Thank you for saying it like it is. Appreciate it 🙂

Lolamontez

Plumbthedepths wrote: »

Do what feels right for you. If you are not comfortable politely decline. As for your husband ( I'm male and married 28 years) tell him to cop on, your pregnancy is your number 1 concern.

Thanks Plumbthedepths for responding to my thread, deep down I don't feel comfortable and like you say I have a duty of care to the baby as my number 1 concern. Thank you for saying it like it is. Appreciate it 🙂

Lolamontez

Dial Hard wrote: »

Your husband is perfectly free to attend without you if he wants to go and you don't.

Do what feels right for you.

Thanks Dial Hard for responding to my message, I agree with you and deep down I would prefer to sit in on this one and let them think whatever they will of me as I know it isn't sitting right with me to go. Thanks for the feedback appreciate it

splinter65

Lolamontez wrote: »

I'm 31weeks pregnant and have been asked out for lunch with family this weekend at a relatively busy restaurant . Aside from grocery shopping with a mask on, I have not mixed much socially nor had a take away let alone go for a meal. Am I being OTT in declining an invite?
If I wasn't pregnant I would feel differently about the situation however its with my husband and his family and let's just say he's none too pleased at the moment that I am not all for attending.

Your health and welfare and that of your unborn baby is your priority, not humoring people who really, frankly, should know better. I’ll be honest and say that if I was lunching in that restaurant and observed an expectant mum sitting there in the middle of this pandemic id be inclined to be a little bit “judgy” about that. In my own head of course, I’m not Karen, but judgy nonetheless.
Tell your husband that you’re a bit disappointed with his lack of consideration of you.

Lolamontez

annoyedgal wrote: »

Yep agree with everyone who said do whatever makes you feel comfortable.
I'm 28 weeks and have eaten out a few times. Felt very comfortable in all but one reataurant as was hard to socially distance and staff not wearing masks. Felt very comfortable in the other places.
I think if you've been super cautious it can be very hard and stressful to step out of the safe bubble. I was pretty anxious the first time i met up with friends or went to a shopping centre but doing these things made me realise you can do them relatively safely with a mask and distancing. And it felt good to do some normal things! But you have to go with your comfort level and don't feel bad about refusing.

Hi annoyedgal, thanks so much for your response, you put it perfectly about the safe bubble that is exactly how I feel at the moment, I am always a yes person when it comes to functions but I feel strongly on this given where I am at the moment. My husband was far more clued in to the necessity to distance ourselves during the lockdown but since he has returned to work he has blended in with normal life to an extent in meetings and work trips abroad. I am working remotely from home all the time since March and feel a lot more concerned right now than him. Thanks for your feed back I appreciate it very much

Lolamontez

splinter65 wrote: »

Your health and welfare and that of your unborn baby is your priority, not humoring people who really, frankly, should know better. I’ll be honest and say that if I was lunching in that restaurant and observed an expectant mum sitting there in the middle of this pandemic id be inclined to be a little bit “judgy” about that. In my own head of course, I’m not Karen, but judgy nonetheless.
Tell your husband that you’re a bit disappointed with his lack of consideration of you.

Thanks so much Splinter for taking the time to respond, I fully agree with you. There are times when I have to head out and mask up etc as I have being doing since March, I feel lunching out is a non essential at present for me. I feel that my in laws and husband are becoming very lax about the fact that this is far from over. Its disappointing for sure and I will tell him that too when I meet him later. Thanks so much for your sound advice Splinter

Lolamontez

splinter65 wrote: »

Your health and welfare and that of your unborn baby is your priority, not humoring people who really, frankly, should know better. I’ll be honest and say that if I was lunching in that restaurant and observed an expectant mum sitting there in the middle of this pandemic id be inclined to be a little bit “judgy” about that. In my own head of course, I’m not Karen, but judgy nonetheless.
Tell your husband that you’re a bit disappointed with his lack of consideration of you.

Thanks so much Splinter for taking the time to respond, I fully agree with you. There are times when I have to head out and mask up etc as I have being doing since March, I feel lunching out is a non essential at present for me. I feel that my in laws and husband are becoming very lax about the fact that this is far from over. Its disappointing for sure and I will tell him that too when I meet him later. Thanks so much for your sound advice Splinter

annoyedgal

The OP is fully entitled to not attend without judgement as are pregnant women entitled to go to lunch without judgement !!



quote="splinter65;114195382"]Your health and welfare and that of your unborn baby is your priority, not humoring people who really, frankly, should know better. I’ll be honest and say that if I was lunching in that restaurant and observed an expectant mum sitting there in the middle of this pandemic id be inclined to be a little bit “judgy” about that. In my own head of course, I’m not Karen, but judgy nonetheless.
Tell your husband that you’re a bit disappointed with his lack of consideration of you.[/quote]

Plumbthedepths

splinter65 wrote: »

Your health and welfare and that of your unborn baby is your priority, not humoring people who really, frankly, should know better. I’ll be honest and say that if I was lunching in that restaurant and observed an expectant mum sitting there in the middle of this pandemic id be inclined to be a little bit “judgy” about that. In my own head of course, I’m not Karen, but judgy nonetheless.
Tell your husband that you’re a bit disappointed with his lack of consideration of you.

You would judge a pregnant woman for dining out? At least you don't judge women who leave their children alone, but that's different of course?This is the most hypocritical comment I have ever seen on this site.

moleyv

If you feel uncomfortable about dining out you aren’t going to enjoy it anyway.

Maybe have a nose into the restaurant to see how they are operating and that might give you some comfort, if you would like to go.

Lolamontez

moleyv wrote: »

If you feel uncomfortable about dining out you aren’t going to enjoy it anyway.

Maybe have a nose into the restaurant to see how they are operating and that might give you some comfort, if you would like to go.

Hi Moleyv thanks for responding to my thread, that's exactly how I feel too, no point sitting there and not feeling at ease, for the sake of the remaining few weeks of my pregnancy I will just continue on as I have been all along. Less places I visit the reduced chance of contacting the virus. It's wearing trying to be careful , I am now concerned about the hand sanitizer I have in the car as triclosan is an ingredient in it that I have just realised may have carcinogenic properties.