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Harry and Meghan - OP updated with Threadbanned Users 4/5/21
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Such is the power of using sensitive topics as a shield from criticism. They can be invoked because there are likely consequences for anyone calling them out on playing victim.
My sister in law, a toxic narcissist, wasn't getting her way during a weekend visit to me in London in 2009 and had a meltdown which involved screaming abuse at me and involved threats of violent retribution from her family. Her dad was going to break my legs. Her brothers were going to beat me up. She even rang her mother in tears saying that she was afraid of me and feared for her safety.
She wanted to go clubbing, it was late on a Sunday and I refused because I had work the next day, had no idea where to go and so she started acting like a diva, refused to use stairs to use a toilet because she had high heels on and started making an embarrassing spectacle and very public scene outside about needing to "take a piss". If you've ever dealt with someone like this you can appreciate such attention seeking behaviour. What had I said? In trying to mitigate her meltdown I suggested she use a kebab shop toilet we happened to pass by. She refused and now had a problem with me suggesting she use somewhere so dirty and disgusting. I simply said that if she needed to go that badly then she'd have used the stairs in the first instance. Basically, beggars can't be choosers and stop disgracing us. It was throwing petrol on a fire and that lead to her screaming abuse and threatening me as mentioned. My brother was dating her for six years at the time but I thought this was above and beyond and it was sufficient to warrant him dumping her but she'd groomed him and it was normalised for him. He likely got such abuse himself. He stayed with her but I was done and had the self-awareness and self-respect to cut contact with her. I was close to my brother and this episode became the elephant in the room between us both. Contact ceased for seven months until my brother contacted me and said he'd learned new details which explained "what happened in London". He teased me out and asked would I meet them. Like a fool, I was expecting an apology i.e. sorry , let bygones be bygones, won't happen again etc. The problem is that an actual apology is a promise to not be abusive in future. Narcissists don't do apologies, they lie to cover themselves. This is where the use of sensitive topics to play the victim played itself out. She had confided with my brother that when they were on holiday two years earlier in Turkey she went into a bathroom in a pub and some local who'd been trying it on with her all evening followed her in and she had to lock herself in a cubicle until he gave up. This all happened with my brother unaware of it. She was explicit about how she felt she was going to get raped or even murdered. Her gambit was that the episode in London had triggered a post traumatic panic attack and she had acted out as she'd been triggered. Curious, I started asking questions as her story had more holes in it than Swiss cheese. It became obvious that this was unwelcome and I was confronted about not actually believing her. In the interest of not wanting to fall out with my brother I accepted it and stopped probing. Ultimately, she engineered a falling out between us anyway as we were presumably too close for her liking. (Taking away the support network). She did similar with my older brother whom she claimed had called her a whore and also with our parents who she claimed always belittled her and had no time for her. She tried to poison him against each and every one of us, even former friends of his. A particular favorite was her continyally getting bullied wherever she worked. A convenient cover for explaining how she could never settle in a job and a source for her constant drama. My immediate family thankfully still retain tentative contact. She bullied my wife at their mutual job, twisted the events to loudly play the victim, tried to throw her under the bus personally and professionally while my gullible brother believed and supported another act of victim playing and, ultimately, she got what she wanted with a falling out. Knowing what she was doing, I called her out and confronted her about it leading to a rift. It was so constant that my wife had suicide ideation because of the toll it took on her. The email about Meghan always needing someone to focus on struck a chord with us. My wife was presumably another victim. We haven't spoken for 6 years and it's absolute bliss not having to put up with that nonsense anymore. I think the BRF are feeling the same. My brother made his bed and that satisfies me. He is married with two kids and, amongst the litany of other victim playing stories drummed up to excuse her toxic behaviour, to groom him to protect her, to normalise her disorder, he likely still believes that his wife was almost raped right under his nose 14 years ago. It is very much a relationship based on coercive control. If he ever cottoned on to her pattern of abuse then he'll be in a world of trouble if he ever tries to extricate himself.
I think that's why this whole thing resonates. I have never met them but from what I can see the behaviour and the "tactics" are dead give aways. There is no need for high profile interviews if all you truly want to do is seek privacy. Unless you need to engage in some denial, deflection and distortion against people who did whatever they could for you initially but who quickly grasped who they were dealing with. I think the whole race card being played and the no one helped me when I was suicidal narrative reeks of the same type of deflective behaviour. The reported bullying to me suggests there's no smoke without fire as well. If you didn't know any better then you'd think my sister in law was innocence personified. The optics are a front as beneath the surface lies a family wrecking malignant narcissist. The proverbial wolf in sheep's clothing. Plus ca change with Harry and Meghan.
Are they still together? What sort of relationship do their children have with their grandparents? I ask, because I know of a similar situation in my own extended family0 -
End of the road is wilfully misrepresenting what I said. I never said they had no right to hold and opinion, or to feel like they were struggling. I believe the media stuff must have been horrendous, regardless of what type of person you are.
All I said was that their interview would have gone down much better if they had acknowledged the huge wealth and influence that comes with their position as privileged royals. Especially during a global pandemic where millions have died, and millions more have lost jobs.0 -
And making jibes about how somebody has no right to hold an opinion or to feel like they are struggling because they are “privileged” is perfectly acceptable!
no, it's not.
so dispite harry and megan being privelaged, that does not mean they won't and don't struggle with certain things.ticking a box on a form does not make you of a religion.
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Interesting article in the Telegraph.0
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End of the road is wilfully misrepresenting what I said. I never said they had no right to hold and opinion, or to feel like they were struggling. I believe the media stuff must have been horrendous, regardless of what type of person you are.
All I said was that their interview would have gone down much better if they had acknowledged the huge wealth and influence that comes with their position as privileged royals. Especially during a global pandemic where millions have died, and millions more have lost jobs.
to be fair if they had done that, i can guarantee you there would be those accusing them of rubbing their wealth and privilage in people's faces during the same pandemic.
they wouldn't win on that score no matter what they did, so they were best to stay away from that.ticking a box on a form does not make you of a religion.
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end of the road wrote: »to be fair if they had done that, i can guarantee you there would be those accusing them of rubbing their wealth and privilage in people's faces during the same pandemic.
they wouldn't win on that score no matter what they did, so they were best to stay away from that.
People started off really liking Harry and Meghan. You make it seem like people actively wanted to dislike them0 -
end of the road wrote: »to be fair if they had done that, i can guarantee you there would be those accusing them of rubbing their wealth and privilage in people's faces during the same pandemic.
they wouldn't win on that score no matter what they did, so they were best to stay away from that.
It's almost like they would have been better off not doing the interview in the first place!0 -
Be right back wrote: »Interesting article in the Telegraph.
Seems to be a paywall there, sadly. Screengrab of article to read?0 -
Are they still together? What sort of relationship do their children have with their grandparents? I ask, because I know of a similar situation in my own extended family
Still together. When I confronted her bullying of my wife (then my girlfriend), she pretty much immediately got her own parents involved. The flying monkeys. A grown, married woman getting her parents involved was telling. I got the whole "you're the true bully" role reversal gambit. I was ordered to cease contact. I was exposing her modus operandi, I was a threat and my brother went along with it throwing me under the bus. Her parents confronted my own privately about how disgusted they were by my behaviour. They got the "our son is no bully" spiel back and it predictably lead to a rift. They backed me and my wife up and they are basically shunned as much as possible. My parents are now akin to black sheep at anything involving "their" side (births, christenings, birthdays) as in they must be invited along but it would be preferred that they stay away. Contact is minimal. Our mother goes for the kids' sake but our dad avoids them like the plague. Amazing how much tangenital damage one person can do.0 -
People started off really liking Harry and Meghan. You make it seem like people actively wanted to dislike them
there are those who actively want to dislike them to push particular agendas.
the question is how many of those there are and how many genuinely dislike them, even though realistically as it stands, there isn't any tangible evidence that shows they should be liked or disliked either way.It's almost like they would have been better off not doing the interview in the first place!
well, if the british tabloids weren't so trashy, they wouldn't have needed to do it in all likely hood, but given they are, there wasn't really a choice if megan and harry wanted to challenge the things being said about them.ticking a box on a form does not make you of a religion.
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end of the road wrote: »there are those who actively want to dislike them to push particular agendas.
the question is how many of those there are and how many genuinely dislike them, even though realistically as it stands, there isn't any tangible evidence that shows they should be liked or disliked either way.
well, if the british tabloids weren't so trashy, they wouldn't have needed to do it in all likely hood, but given they are, there wasn't really a choice if megan and harry wanted to challenge the things being said about them.
If only Oprah wasn’t so trashy and full of mistruths, we would not have to persist on this forum0 -
Still together. When I confronted her bullying of my wife (then my girlfriend), she pretty much immediately got her own parents involved. The flying monkeys. A grown, married woman getting her parents involved was telling. I got the whole "you're the true bully" role reversal gambit. I was ordered to cease contact. I was exposing her modus operandi, I was a threat and my brother went along with it throwing me under the bus. Her parents confronted my own privately about how disgusted they were by my behaviour. They got the "our son is no bully" spiel back and it predictably lead to a rift. They backed me and my wife up and they are basically shunned as much as possible. My parents are now akin to black sheep at anything involving "their" side (births, christenings, birthdays) as in they must be invited along but it would be preferred that they stay away. Contact is minimal. Our mother goes for the kids' sake but our dad avoids them like the plague. Amazing how much tangenital damage one person can do.
I'm really sad to read that.
Deep down in his heart, your brother probably knows the truth but is too far in to admit it.To thine own self be true
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People started off really liking Harry and Meghan. You make it seem like people actively wanted to dislike them
Interesting point. Her toxicity and self obsessed drama has so taken over that I’d forgotten. Only a few short years ago he was the darling little lost boy and ummarried young prince looking for love who fell in love on a blind date - and she was the girl at the gates who achieved a Disney style fairytale dream and happy ever after cinderella story.
Now barely a few years on, all there is is hate and toxic poison. He has now abandoned all his schoolboy and Eton friends, his country that he swore to defend in the army, his once much loved brother, and lives in isolation with her somewhere between a loaned estate in Canada and a rented place in LA. All we hear from them is misery and hate and toxic barbs agains their families.
They have come so far together in a few short years.0 -
JustAThought wrote: »Interesting point. Her toxicity and self obsessed drama has so taken over that I’d forgotten. Only a few short years ago he was the darling little lost boy and ummarried young prince looking for love who fell in love on a blind date - and she was the girl at the gates who achieved a Disney style fairytale dream and happy ever after cinderella story.
Now barely a few years on, all there is is hate and toxic poison. He has now abandoned all his schoolboy and Eton friends, his country that he swore to defend in the army, his once much loved brother, and lives in isolation with her somewhere between a loaned estate in Canada and a rented place in LA. All we hear from them is misery and hate and toxic barbs agains their families.
They have come so far together in a few short years.
The trajectory is mind-boggling
This article was written by Piers in 2017 and states what a keeper Meghan was.
https://www.google.ie/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5121713/amp/PIERS-MORGAN-Congrats-Harry-pal-Meghan-keeper.htmlIt0 -
Harry said something like that if Diana was still alive, there wouldn't have been such a falling out. If she was still here, I reckon Meghan would not have got near Harry.0
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Be right back wrote: »Harry said something like that if Diana was still alive, there wouldn't have been such a falling out. If she was still here, I reckon Meghan would not have got near Harry.
Harry said that??0 -
Valoren I’ve followed your posts on your sister in law on here for years and I can’t believe the situation is still ongoing. I think people underestimate the amount of damage a narcissist can inflict upon a family. Nothing is ever dropped, only ever escalated. It’s actually kind of fascinating to see how they operate. If they feel threatened or in any way exposed, then woe betide anyone who is in their path. The impulsivity, poor behaviour control and over the top reactions to every perceived slight as well as a lack of insight and blind disregard to their own behaviour and their ability to apportion blame to absolutely everyone but themselves is truly incredible. They’re easily spotted once you’ve incurred the wrath of one0
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JustAThought wrote: »Interesting point. Her toxicity and self obsessed drama has so taken over that I’d forgotten. Only a few short years ago he was the darling little lost boy and ummarried young prince looking for love who fell in love on a blind date - and she was the girl at the gates who achieved a Disney style fairytale dream and happy ever after cinderella story.
Now barely a few years on, all there is is hate and toxic poison. He has now abandoned all his schoolboy and Eton friends, his country that he swore to defend in the army, his once much loved brother, and lives in isolation with her somewhere between a loaned estate in Canada and a rented place in LA. All we hear from them is misery and hate and toxic barbs agains their families.
They have come so far together in a few short years.
They were dead right to leave the UK, which is a toxic cesspool of hateful tabloid garbage. They actually seem pretty happy to me, not full of misery and hate at all.
If it's toxic misery and hate you're after, you really should read some of the numerous articles Piers Morgan has written about her in his Daily Mail column.
https://twitter.com/camcamdamn/status/1367492240021590026
That number is dwarfed by the Twitter comments he's written. However, I don't think she's ever mentioned him once.0 -
dark crystal wrote: »They were dead right to leave the UK, which is a toxic cesspool of hateful tabloid garbage. They actually seem pretty happy to me, not full of misery and hate at all.
If it's toxic misery and hate you're after, you really should read some of the numerous articles Piers Morgan has written about her in his Daily Mail column.
https://twitter.com/camcamdamn/status/1367492240021590026
That number is dwarfed by the Twitter comments he's written. However, I don't think she's ever mentioned him once.
https://www.google.ie/amp/s/www.express.co.uk/showbiz/tv-radio/732020/Piers-Morgan-Prince-Harry-girlfriend-Meghan-Markle-fancied-first-Good-Morning-Britain/amp
Another positive article from Piers to Meghan. It is “deranged” when a journo writes about a well-known figure but it is not “deranged” to feed gossip about one’s own family to the media via Oprah’s friend Gayle.
Anybody who holds an opinion now deranged?0 -
retro:electro wrote: »Valoren I’ve followed your posts on your sister in law on here for years and I can’t believe the situation is still ongoing. I think people underestimate the amount of damage a narcissist can inflict upon a family. Nothing is ever dropped, only ever escalated. It’s actually kind of fascinating to see how they operate. If they feel threatened or in any way exposed, then woe betide anyone who is in their path. The impulsivity, poor behaviour control and over the top reactions to every perceived slight as well as a lack of insight and blind disregard to their own behaviour and their ability to apportion blame to absolutely everyone but themselves is truly incredible. They’re easily spotted once you’ve incurred the wrath of one
Reminds of that absolute dangerous piece of work on Below Deck Med ( the chief steward one) - I picked her out as a dangerous manipulative weapon within the first 2 or 3 episodes of series one. Its taken til series 2 for everyone to see what a dangerous piece of vindictive controlling spite she is. Sounds like your SIL.
And Megan.
I guess ‘poor’ Harry has had in some ways a very surreal, kow-towed to, whimsical and fluffy personal social life - I can’t see him having being exposed to someone like this in his inner social circle before. He couldn’t have imagined someone as cunning and manipulative and hysterically manipulative as her. Or know how to deal with it ither than take her at her word. He has little life experience of these types to protect him - and it seems he was quick to freeze out anyone and everyone who raised gentle questions or spoke to him questioning her - old boarding school friends, his brother, inner circle lifelong ‘toff’ friends - a trick she maybe helped him with given her vicious and ruthless practice with her own husband and close and extended family. And inlaws now too.0 -
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JustAThought wrote: »Reminds of that absolute dangerous piece of work on Below Deck Med ( the chief steward one) - I picked her out as a dangerous manipulative weapon within the first 2 or 3 episodes of series one. Its taken til series 2 for everyone to see what a dangerous piece of vindictive controlling spite she is. Sounds like your SIL.
And Megan.
I guess ‘poor’ Harry has had in some ways a very surreal, kow-towed to, whimsical and fluffy personal social life - I can’t see him having being exposed to someone like this in his inner social circle before. He couldn’t have imagined someone as cunning and manipulative and hysterically manipulative as her. Or know how to deal with it ither than take her at her word. He has little life experience of these types to protect him - and it seems he was quick to freeze out anyone and everyone who raised gentle questions or spoke to him questioning her - old boarding school friends, his brother, inner circle lifelong ‘toff’ friends - a trick she maybe helped him with given her vicious and ruthless practice with her own husband and close and extended family. And inlaws now too.
I think that Harry is just as culpable, if not more so. He didn’t meet Meghan when he was 15. He had plenty of girlfriends before. And ultimately, it was he who ultimately allowed and facilitated his family’s decimation on public broadcast.0 -
https://www.google.ie/amp/s/www.express.co.uk/showbiz/tv-radio/732020/Piers-Morgan-Prince-Harry-girlfriend-Meghan-Markle-fancied-first-Good-Morning-Britain/amp
Another positive article from Piers to Meghan. It is “deranged” when a journo writes about a well-known figure but it is not “deranged” to feed gossip about one’s own family to the media via Oprah’s friend Gayle.
Anybody who holds an opinion now deranged?
That's not what I wrote at all and you know it.
Morgan is quite clearly obsessed by this woman, for whatever reason, and has spent quite considerable time berating her, calling her names and spouting venom about her all over his Daily Mail column, TV morning show and Twitter feed, when she has never said or done anything to him. That's what's deranged.
Meghan gives ONE interview to put her side across, and she's hauled over the coals for it, while Piers is allowed numerous platforms to bully her and some people think that's ok because, well, he wrote something nice about her five years ago. He's never gone in on Harry the same way, interestingly.
Here's how quick his opinion changed btw:
https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2021/03/piers-morgan-meghan-markle-meltdown-relationship-timeline.html
May 14–19, 2018: As Markle family drama unfolds in the days before the wedding, Morgan tweets his sympathy for Meghan, whose father won’t attend. He then writes a column cutting into Meghan’s dad, who sold photos to a paparazzi photographer, and expressing sadness for Meghan. The day before the wedding, Morgan tweets again that he’s still upset about missing out on the wedding invite.
May 20, 2018: Morgan loves the royal wedding, which he watched (much to his dismay) from TV, not the chapel.
June 18, 2018: Morgan begins to turn on Meghan. He invites Meghan’s dad to his ITV morning show and paints a narrative of him as the pitiful victim of Meghan’s cruelty and coldness.
December 2018: Morgan calls Meghan his ex-friend and a social climber. He also keeps writing in defense of Meghan’s dad, calling Meghan out for her apparently abhorrent treatment of him. Fans think this line of attack getting a little obsessive—and a little old.
So, when you take Meghan to task for " feeding gossip about one’s own family to the media", perhaps that should work both ways, should it not?0 -
Most of those articles contain Harry’s name too. Only 8 are solely about Meghan.0
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retro:electro wrote: »Most of those articles contain Harry’s name too. Only 9 are solely about Meghan.
Why should anyone be expected to put up with that level of vitriol though? She did absolutely nothing to the man!
It's quite a shame he didn't put so much energy into writing columns about Prince Andrew evading FBI questioning about sleeping with under-aged girls, although that wouldn't fit with his brown-nosing the Royal family at every given opportunity I guess.0 -
dark crystal wrote: »Why should anyone be expected to put up with that level of vitriol though?She did absolutely nothing to the man!
It's quite a shame he didn't put so much energy into writing columns about Prince Andrew evading FBI questioning about sleeping with under-aged girls, although that wouldn't fit with his brown-nosing the Royal family at every given opportunity I guess.
And what about all the nasty stories written about all the public figures? Part of fame, unfortunately, is dealing with the negative as well as the positive press. It is not like Meghan is the only person ever to have experienced negative press. At this rate, we should shut this thread and any thread that discussed any negative stories about anybody.0 -
dark crystal wrote: »Why should anyone be expected to put up with that level of vitriol though? She did absolutely nothing to the man!
It's quite a shame he didn't put so much energy into writing columns about Prince Andrew evading FBI questioning about sleeping with under-aged girls, although that wouldn't fit with his brown-nosing the Royal family at every given opportunity I guess.
A quick Google shows me that he did.
https://www.google.ie/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7710841/amp/PIERS-MORGAN-hell-call-Prince-Andrew-Royal-Highness.html
https://www.google.ie/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7697803/amp/PIERS-MORGAN-didnt-believe-word-Prince-Andrew-said-Jeffrey-Epstein.html
https://www.google.ie/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7939069/amp/PIERS-MORGAN-Andrew-stop-hiding-mothers-skirts.html
https://www.google.ie/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7722247/amp/Prince-Andrew-interview-FBI-says-ex-butler-Paul-Burrell-Good-Morning-Britain.html
https://www.google.ie/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7694523/amp/Piers-Morgan-brands-Prince-Andrew-insane-agreeing-disastrous-TV-interview.html
I feel grubby for even forming a semi defence of the man but in reality it seems like he was every bit as scathing towards Andrew as he has been for Meghan0 -
And what about all the nasty stories written about all the public figures? Part of fame, unfortunately, is dealing with the negative as well as the positive press. It is not like Meghan is the only person ever to have experienced negative press. At this rate, we should shut this thread and any thread that discussed any negative stories about anybody.
This thread is about Meghan and Harry - the clue is in the title.
I never said she was the only one. Caroline Flack was another, for example. I bring up the toxic press because, ultimately, that's a large part of the reason they stood down and moved away from the UK.
It's the double standard of this couple being decimated because they had the gall to say how damaging the constant barrage of negative press was to their mental health in ONE interview, while people like Piers Morgan spew bile on a daily basis and are given a pass because 'free speech' or some such rubbish, that I find hard to swallow.0 -
If only Oprah wasn’t so trashy and full of mistruths, we would not have to persist on this forum
well, even if she is, and personally i don't know nor care whether she is or isn't,
ultimately it changes nothing in terms of megan and harry given oprah is her own individual and her issues if any, and her behaviour whether bad or good, is on her.The trajectory is mind-boggling
This article was written by Piers in 2017 and states what a keeper Meghan was.
https://www.google.ie/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5121713/amp/PIERS-MORGAN-Congrats-Harry-pal-Meghan-keeper.htmlIt
and when she refused to be his new bff, oh boy, we all know what happened next.ticking a box on a form does not make you of a religion.
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dark crystal wrote: »This thread is about Meghan and Harry - the clue is in the title.
I never said she was the only one. Caroline Flack was another, for example. I bring up the toxic press because, ultimately, that's a large part of the reason they stood down and moved away from the UK.
It's the double standard of this couple being decimated because they had the gall to say how damaging the constant barrage of negative press was to their mental health in ONE interview, while people like Piers Morgan spew bile on a daily basis and are given a pass because 'free speech' or some such rubbish, that I find hard to swallow.
But most people on this thread are railing against the fact that Harry decimated his own family, who to my knowledge, have never publicly decimated or even spoken ill of him0 -
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JustAThought wrote: »Harry said that??
Can't find it now where I saw it. It was along those lines.0
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