Back to 'normal': Have you changed?

sporina

Deleted User wrote: »

Maybe. But nobody is on this thread, which is after all for sharing personal experiences, trying to tell the positive people that they're wrong to feel the way they do, or they're living their life wrong, or they need to think differently, or whatever. That's why it comes across as ignorant.

Everyone's experiences are valuable, and sometimes venting about negative experiences is cathartic in and of itself - and requires no response or attempts to find solutions.

Being affected in a negative way by this last year is not a personal failing.

sorry but I'm afraid someone has done exactly that.. saying that its all front with positive people etc.. or something to that effect..

and anyway why on earth would you criticise someone for being positive, if its serving them well? gee I can't get that at all - perhaps I have a different mindset..

So no, sorry, I can't see how it can be taken as flippant due to the above.. but mayb its because it antagonises them.. due to where they are at... which I guess is understandable..

and yes as I said previously, venting IS good - but it should not go on and on and fester into other aspects of their lives and making matters worse..

I think mindset has a lot to do with it.. change only comes when you want it..

I didn't say that being affected in a -ve way is a personal feeling - again, if someone should interpret the positive comments as implying that, then again - thats down to where they are at,.. unfortunately..

Antares35

A cup of te wrote: »

Congrats and best wishes, Antares :-) I know it can happen still but I suppose when there's talk of this going on for years I start to worry what age I'll be when I can actually date again. I know it could happen now but the opportunities for it to happen have been greatly reduced and I've never been into the online dating.
Thanks, MrStuffins. I'll definitely listen to that. It's ridiculous at the moment when you can't even view a house.
Oh, look, I'm alive and myself and my family are physically well but, yeah, this experience has overall been an absolute nightmare and I want my old life back ASAP. Pros and cons and winners and losers to everything. To answer the OP I am a shell of my former self and query my purpose now. I think I will bounce back provided it doesn't go on for too much longer.

I forgot to mention we met online But I understand it isn't for everyone. Tbh I'd not done it before, but I wasn't in the mood for going out clubbing etc after being through so much, so I found it to just be a distraction. But, whatever is right for you. I hope it all works out. There's talk of them opening outdoor dining, so there could be opportunities there. I hope they open outdoor bar/ terrace areas in time for the summer. Be nice. I'm hoping that when they talk about it in terms of years that maybe they mean annual vaccines and the like, possibly worst case scenario lockdown measures but only say during specific periods like flu season etc. That's the hope anyway!

bucketybuck

A cup of te wrote: »

33 when it started, soon to be 35 and I am trying to accept that I will likely never have children now.

Have you tried just going for a walk, or thinking positive thoughts?

MrStuffins

bucketybuck wrote: »

Have you tried just going for a walk, or thinking positive thoughts?

Another thing that will make you feel good is, when you have a negative outlook, you should try drag others into that mire with you.

It won't actually help, It'll just make you feel better temporarily. Like when you're in college and haven't started your big project yet. If you hear one of your mates hasn't started yet either, it makes you feel better even though it doesn't actually help your situation in any way.

Misery loves company!

bucketybuck

bucketybuck wrote: »

Have you tried just going for a walk, or thinking positive thoughts?

Have you? Ever? It seems like you need it.

bucketybuck

Deleted User wrote: »

Have you? Ever? It seems like you need it.

I don't really walk, I prefer a good long run myself, been doing a lot of trail running recently just to mix it up a bit. I like to add an extra 5km onto the run every time some NPHET clown tells us to stay at home, but just 1km extra when some other clown tries to claim runners are killing grannies every time they go outside.

bucketybuck

bucketybuck wrote: »

I don't really walk, I prefer a good long run myself, been doing a lot of trail running recently just to mix it up a bit. I like to add an extra 5km onto the run every time some NPHET clown tells us to stay at home, but just 1km extra when some other clown tries to claim runners are killing grannies every time they go outside.

Ah, the everyone is stupid except me type.

MrStuffins

bucketybuck wrote: »

I don't really walk, I prefer a good long run myself, been doing a lot of trail running recently just to mix it up a bit. I like to add an extra 5km onto the run every time some NPHET clown tells us to stay at home, but just 1km extra when some other clown tries to claim runners are killing grannies every time they go outside.

Sounds like you're not running enough.

bucketybuck

Deleted User wrote: »

Ah, the everyone is stupid except me type.

We are all in this together.

bucketybuck

bucketybuck wrote: »

We are all in this together.

We are. Whether we like it or not.

MrStuffins

bucketybuck wrote: »

We are all in this together.

And we'll all be in the pub together by the end of the summer!

Looking forward to it!

DessieJames

Deleted User wrote: »

We are. Whether we like it or not.

never has anything been mentioned so much that couldnt be any further from the truth.

We most certainly are not all in this together, at the start maybe but the overwhelming majority of people at this present time have zero confidence in the government and NPHET.

DessieJames

DessieJames wrote: »

never has anything been mentioned so much that couldnt be any further from the truth.

We most certainly are not all in this together, at the start maybe but the overwhelming majority of people at this present time have zero confidence in the government and NPHET.

Yawn.

MrStuffins

DessieJames wrote: »

the overwhelming majority of people at this present time have zero confidence in the government and NPHET.

The overwhelming majority of people in your echo-chamber.

Meanwhile, back in the real world, everyone else is preparing for a summer/autumn of friends, family, pubs, restaurants and craic. Buzzing!

Bobeagleburger

DessieJames wrote: »

never has anything been mentioned so much that couldnt be any further from the truth.

We most certainly are not all in this together, at the start maybe but the overwhelming majority of people at this present time have zero confidence in the government and NPHET.

Overwhelming
Majority
Zero confidence


Words used when trying real hard to make a point that simply isn't true.

salonfire

DessieJames wrote: »

The only way ive changed is i have even more hated for the shambolic government and NPHET, they have made an absolute mess of the whole thing, none of these parasites suffered during lockdown with big salarys and houses,while a large porion of people have suffered untold misery.

Same here. The have and have-nots divide between the public sector and private sector is only going to widen, it's absolutely galling.

While forcibly closing down businesses for months, they give themselves and mates pay increases and shorten their own working days. The likes of nurses, already opinionated of themselves before this, are going to be out to elevate their own self importance even more. We'll never hear the end of their demands, their sense of importance and continuing fawning over them.

FF's Michael McGrath has already promised a bigger state, that means more recruitment, more inefficiencies, more interference in our lives all the while we have the pleasure of paying even more for it.

Wanderer78

salonfire wrote:

While forcibly closing down businesses for months, they give themselves and mates pay increases and shorten their own working days. The likes of nurses, already opinionated of themselves before this, are going to be out to elevate their own self importance even more. We'll never hear the end of their demands, their sense of importance and continuing fawning over them.

So frontline staff are opinionated now, are you okay?

salonfire

Wanderer78 wrote: »

So frontline staff are opinionated now,

Yup. Look at the teachers for example, quite willing that others may die so they get bumped up the priority list.

All-in-all, leaves me very cynical of the state. Their own conditions come first, while dictating how the low paid in hospitality should be turfed out of their jobs.

Wanderer78

salonfire wrote: »

Yup. Look at the teachers for example, quite willing that others may die so they get bumped up the priority list.

All-in-all, leaves me very cynical of the state. Their own conditions come first, while dictating how the low paid in hospitality should be turfed out of their jobs.

really!

not an irish story but.....

https://twitter.com/nmannathukkaren/status/1380129214259720202

Pwindedd

I can’t wait to get back to normal. It won’t be the normal I had before as so much has changed for me personally over the last year. December 2019 I was flying high. I’d got news I was successful in a job interview for a position I really wanted. I had someone in my life who was amazing. My daughter was happy. It seemed to be going well. 3 months later and into lockdown ... then my heart got broken and my daughter got let go from work. Fortunately my new job eventually came through, but because it was now work from home I really struggled to pick things up - Still am struggling to a certain extent but I’m getting there.

It’s not been easy at all - daughter on PUP. Confined to quarters pretty much. Her circle of friends has been fractured due to the many varying levels of vulnerability amongst them and their families. “I can’t see you on your birthday cos my dad is vulnerable and you were out last week with so-and-so and his cousin has COVID” etc.

Me trying to stay positive for her and get over my breakup. Can’t go out on the lash with the girls and have the “he’s an absolute w****r” convo over too many margaritas. Which then led to me trying to get Mr Rebound via online dating...what a car crash that turned out to be.

The only thing that has made me feel anyway better about things is seeing the absolute tripe my husband has been spouting on FB during all of this and counting my blessings that I plucked up the courage to leave five years ago. I could still be there and having to live with that level of stupidity through all of this ! Whatever situation you’re in, it can always be worse.

I have really good days. And some absolute stinkers. But mostly at the moment it’s just ‘meh’. The apathy towards everything and everyone is a worrying sign. I’ve stopped caring. But caring about things is something I’ve always been good at. Wether it’s work, people or hobbies.

A few of the days lately I’ve just popped out to the shops and ended up taking a detour home driving country lanes to try and feel some kind of thrill or feel alive.

But it’s not all doom and gloom. Daughters back working now. She took a temp agency gig last year and they took her back this January on a longer contract. Hopefully it will progress to permanent. I’ve stopped drinking so much last few months. Now trying to give up smoking.

But when life does finally return to normal my plan is to grab it with both hands and never let go. Say yes to everything. Join a few groups or clubs or volunteer work. Get out and about as often as possible. Meet new people. Practically all of the people I thought were friends have dropped off the map. I tried to keep in touch but when you keep getting no responses you eventually give up


(Wow that was cathartic)

CalamariFritti

I have changed in that I would expect not to commute to work as often as I did in the past. In my industry once or twice a week in the office is enough.

Other than that I deliberately refuse to change my outlook on life and what I expect from a return to normal (pre-2020). I can't wait to ditch the horrendous masks - I dont see any evidence they are helping anyway - and I will certainly go back to normal e.g. shaking hands and hugging and crowded pubs etc.

The whole show was a massive overreaction in my opinion to begin with and I will resist any lingering 'measures' and I cant see myself ever changing in that outlook.

Sam Hain

Wanderer78 wrote: »

really!

not an irish story but.....

https://twitter.com/nmannathukkaren/status/1380129214259720202

I think if he could choose he'd definitely err on the side of caution and choose to go without the poor imitation of human contact over a potential scalding.

Sam Hain

Sam Hain wrote: »

I think if he could choose he'd definitely err on the side of caution and choose to go without the poor imitation of human contact over a potential scalding.

Aw, cmon...throw some king of bone here

Wanderer78

Sam Hain wrote: »

I think if he could choose he'd definitely err on the side of caution and choose to go without the poor imitation of human contact over a potential scalding.

oh ffs! frontline staff are overwhelmed, they cannot fulfill all of their general duties, such as comforting the dying, hence.....

cloudatlas

I have had a very difficult year with work stress, the pandemic has both been a blessing and a curse in this respect. Working from home I haven't been constantly face to face with the people triggering the stress but also I have had very few distractions from work. I'd love to continue to work from home but don't think my work will allow it. Mentally the stress manifested in a physical sense and I've developed gastritis.

I'm at a cross roads in my life where I am wondering if I should stay in the city where I am in this job and buy a flat. The job is fine but I dislike management and they did something that meant I had to take action against them, I was successful but it was a pyrrhic victory in a sense. I'd like to find a partner but I find it difficult to meet people here and it's the same people all the time. I want to go in a different direction but I'm afraid because I'm not in a profession that is in demand and allows people to move country also I was unemployed during the recession and I struggled for years to find proper work.

My parents are getting older and I want to not be too far from them but I also would love to live abroad and test myself in a different culture, I'm too old for work abroad visas. A lot of these problems stem from a lack of confidence but I also don't want to take for granted what I've built for myself.

I've started reading more philosophy, I've started doing more mindfulness activities, certain things have had their value heightened relationships etc.,

You could say the pandemic has really tRIgGeRed me big time.