Ruining a wedding

freshpopcorn

I know a lady who had a civil ceremony in a hotel in the early 2000’s and then had the reception in the same place.
The marriage didn’t last long and she remarried a few years later in the same hotel.
She had the same bridesmaids some of who were related to her first husband, the flower girl was the original one and was about 14 at this stage, she got her dress made identical and the bridesmaids were very similar, poems, songs, band, flowers, etc were the exact same.
Guests found it sort of strange who were at the first wedding.

cj maxx

spacetweek wrote: »

??
There were 8 speeches at my wedding - me+bride, both my parents, her dad, best man, both bridesmaids. No harm, most of them were only a few minutes.

Oh I was at one , the groom went on for a good bit , grand. The best man droned on. Still grand. Then his 4 brothers all had to makes speeches which went on and on and basically sucked the life out of the guests and put everyone in bad mood. People couldn't wait to get the hell out of there

PhilOssophy

cj maxx wrote: »

Oh I was at one , the groom went on for a good bit , grand. The best man droned on. Still grand. Then his 4 brothers all had to makes speeches which went on and on and basically sucked the life out of the guests and put everyone in bad mood. People couldn't wait to get the hell out of there

As bad as that is, once you see the projector being opened up, you know you are in for 20-30 minutes of utter crap that only a few people are interested in.

Dick Turnip

spacetweek wrote: »

??
There were 8 speeches at my wedding - me+bride, both my parents, her dad, best man, both bridesmaids. No harm, most of them were only a few minutes.

I quite like most speeches, I would not be one of those calling for them to be abolished/nobody cares/etc etc but I do hate when people who clearly do not have the skill, nor appetite for making a speech feel the need to make a rambling snore inducing 15 minute+ speech.

but 8 is way too many people...two bridesmaids and best man?? Nah, someone should have got cut there for a start :pac:

Dick Turnip

PhilOssophy wrote: »

As bad as that is, once you see the projector being opened up, you know you are in for 20-30 minutes of utter crap that only a few people are interested in.

Thankfully haven't been at one of those where a projector is pulled out.

Have seen a few on the likes of joe.ie over the years, of "amazing best man speech" where he'll run out the door and cut to a pre recorded video playing in the room of him running around looking for rings/notes etc.

Basically 20 minutes of the worst sitcom pilot you'll ever see

Leave the projector at home folks...

Dick Turnip

spacetweek wrote: »

A gay guy I know (everyone knew he was gay) went through with a sham marriage to a girl. The girl's father said as his speech, addressing her, "Why are you doing this?"

All through the engagement he was shagging blokes on the side.

They were separated within a year and he's in a relationship with a guy now.

Bizarre. Was this in Ireland? What decade are we talking?

Gannicus

I was a a wedding 7 or 8 years ago where it wasn't ruined but the speech by one of the grooms men definitely b0ll0xed up his speech and made an almighty show of the groom in front of the in-laws he hadn't even met yet.

Like you could hear the heart beat of a fly in the room, the room was that quiet. the speech felt like it went on forever.

What's worse is that the night before the groomsman, myself and the groom all sat in the hotel discussing what exactly COULDN'T be said in the speech and what wasn't appropriate or funny.

Low-and-behold that the speech was literally everything we had said was off limits the night before.

To this day the grooms man still hasn't realised how bad the speech was even though he has watched it back himself.

robindch

KissMeArse wrote: »

Turned out he got sunstroke as they asked him what he did all day and if he was getting in enough fluids. He responded by saying he alternated between being in the pool and panning out on a sunbed in the 30+ degree heat. In typical Irish oulfella fashion, he also said he was adequately hydrated after having two cups of tea and a small glass of orange juice with his breakfast that morning (the cups being those ones you get in hotels/apartments that hold enough tea to barely wet your whistle).

Had the same happen with my oldfella a few years back in Rome at a rugby match - the Irish won the match on the saturday, we'd a long dinner and many beers over the course of the evening and sunday morning dawned, hot and sultry and everybody with a hangover and a mouth like the inside of a workman's jockstrap.

I'd booked tickets to the Borghese Gallery which required us to be there around half ten which was too early to get breakfasted properly, so we decided on brunch later, then walked to the gallery in the bright sun. Half an hour into the gallery and the oldfella goes white, burbles incoherently for a few seconds, throws his arms around some priceless, huge and heavy piece of Roman history beside him, nearly capsizing it on top of himself, then slumps against the wall behind him and down onto the floor in a heap. He'd had a mini-stroke a few years ago while returning after a party of mine, and here I am a few years later, wondering is he ok and how the f*ck I'm going to explain a second stroke on my account to my ma and sisters. The staff at the gallery were great though and before panic set in, they'd picked him up, sat him upright in a wheelchair, splashed him with some water and - thank god - he comes around, looking a bit dizzy, then straightens up properly, drinks a half a liter of water from their bottle and returns more or less to normal.

spacetweek

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

Does anyone, actually, get “gifts” for a wedding? I’ve never bought one. Couple of hundred quid in a card and that’s that.

Much handier than having to shop for something and then have to lug it around with you until you can “off load” it on the best man, or someone else.

I think the days when you bought a home appliance (like a toaster) for the couple are over, as everybody already lives together when they get married today.
I've been asked to buy something from a wedding register a few times. The item gets sent straight to them.

spacetweek

Dick Turnip wrote: »

Bizarre. Was this in Ireland? What decade are we talking?

Bizarre and sad, in this day and age.
It was Ireland, everybody involved was Irish and it was only about 8 years ago!

hopgirl

cj maxx wrote: »

Oh I was at one , the groom went on for a good bit , grand. The best man droned on. Still grand. Then his 4 brothers all had to makes speeches which went on and on and basically sucked the life out of the guests and put everyone in bad mood. People couldn't wait to get the hell out of there

Long speeches are a pain. I use to work in hospitality some speeches would just go on. I remembered one wedding 2 hrs and 1/2 the speeches went on for. We were there waiting to go in to clear before we head home wouldn't mind as much if we were getting paid hourly but we on a function rate 🙁😠 . All the guests were bored silly.

chooseusername

Dick Turnip wrote: »

I quite like most speeches, I would not be one of those calling for them to be abolished/nobody cares/etc etc but I do hate when people who clearly do not have the skill, nor appetite for making a speech feel the need to make a rambling snore inducing 15 minute+ speech.

but 8 is way too many people...two bridesmaids and best man?? Nah, someone should have got cut there for a start :pac:

Spot on Dick,
A good speech , whether it's the best man, father of the bride or whoever, can really set the tone for the rest of the day/night.
The trick is to know your limitations.
If it does not come naturally, then keep it brief and just do your part; thank the bridesmaids , propose toasts etc and sit down.
Leave the funnies to the ones who can pull it off, and can read the room.
Be wary of anyone who says they'll wing it.
And hope they steer clear of "wedding speeches.com"

spacetweek

A work colleague got married in Spain. They had a free bar for a few hours then it ran out. So the bride and groom started opening up the envelopes and putting the cash behind the bar. Then the guests drank all of that too!

Beatty69

Another thing happened at my wedding also. I am known for NEVER being late for anything and categorically stated I wasn't going to be late for the church cause I hate that crap of leaving everyone waiting.

Cue the day, me and Dad were the last 2 left in the house, walked out to the photographer and wedding car and the photographer asked was I not carrying anything, says I "no, my bridesmaids have my bag etc." and he says "what about a bouquet?". I had left it in the house! Neither of us had a key to the house on us!!

The driver of the vintage car had to "speed" up to the church and ask my sister for them. She gave him the wrong keys in a panic so he had to go up again. In the end I was half an hour late and everyone was laughing their heads off. I wasn't! Being late just stresses me out. :D:D

pgj2015

spacetweek wrote: »

A work colleague got married in Spain. They had a free bar for a few hours then it ran out. So the bride and groom started opening up the envelopes and putting the cash behind the bar. Then the guests drank all of that too!

Now that is a sound couple. fair play to them.

The guests should have put their hands in their own pockets though, bad form on their part.

PhilOssophy

pgj2015 wrote: »

Now that is a sound couple. fair play to them.

The guests should have put their hands in their own pockets though, bad form on their part.

They had already put their hands in their pockets bigly to fly to Spain for their wedding.

pgj2015

PhilOssophy wrote: »

They had already put their hands in their pockets bigly to fly to Spain for their wedding.

Still though, that money is a gift to the couple, not to be drank by the gluttonous guests.

The Raging Bile Duct

pgj2015 wrote: »

Still though, that money is a gift to the couple, not to be drank by the gluttonous guests.

It sounds like the bride and groom wanted to keep the party going and probably thought it was a great idea with a few drinks onboard. I'm sure most guests would have been happy enough to pay for their own beer once the free bar ended.

facehugger99

robindch wrote: »

Had the same happen with my oldfella a few years back in Rome at a rugby match - the Irish won the match on the saturday, we'd a long dinner and many beers over the course of the evening and sunday morning dawned, hot and sultry and everybody with a hangover and a mouth like the inside of a workman's jockstrap.

I'd booked tickets to the Borghese Gallery which required us to be there around half ten which was too early to get breakfasted properly, so we decided on brunch later, then walked to the gallery in the bright sun. Half an hour into the gallery and the oldfella goes white, burbles incoherently for a few seconds, throws his arms around some priceless, huge and heavy piece of Roman history beside him, nearly capsizing it on top of himself, then slumps against the wall behind him and down onto the floor in a heap. He'd had a mini-stroke a few years ago while returning after a party of mine, and here I am a few years later, wondering is he ok and how the f*ck I'm going to explain a second stroke on my account to my ma and sisters. The staff at the gallery were great though and before panic set in, they'd picked him up, sat him upright in a wheelchair, splashed him with some water and - thank god - he comes around, looking a bit dizzy, then straightens up properly, drinks a half a liter of water from their bottle and returns more or less to normal.

I feel that anecdote needs to end with him heading out later that evening and downing 12 pints.

Beatty69

Beatty69 wrote: »

Another thing happened at my wedding also. I am known for NEVER being late for anything and categorically stated I wasn't going to be late for the church cause I hate that crap of leaving everyone waiting.

Cue the day, me and Dad were the last 2 left in the house, walked out to the photographer and wedding car and the photographer asked was I not carrying anything, says I "no, my bridesmaids have my bag etc." and he says "what about a bouquet?". I had left it in the house! Neither of us had a key to the house on us!!

The driver of the vintage car had to "speed" up to the church and ask my sister for them. She gave him the wrong keys in a panic so he had to go up again. In the end I was half an hour late and everyone was laughing their heads off. I wasn't! Being late just stresses me out. :D:D

Excuse my ignorance but why is a bouquet something worth going back for?

ohnonotgmail

Deleted User wrote: »

Excuse my ignorance but why is a bouquet something worth going back for?

a bride can't walk up the aisle without one.

PhilOssophy

The Raging Bile Duct wrote: »

It sounds like the bride and groom wanted to keep the party going and probably thought it was a great idea with a few drinks onboard. I'm sure most guests would have been happy enough to pay for their own beer once the free bar ended.

Exactly. I have never gone to a wedding expecting a free bar, I'm happy to pay for what I want to drink and if the couple want to throw more money behind the bar, that's their own choice.

pgj2015

The Raging Bile Duct wrote: »

It sounds like the bride and groom wanted to keep the party going and probably thought it was a great idea with a few drinks onboard. I'm sure most guests would have been happy enough to pay for their own beer once the free bar ended.

it would have been funny if they opened a card in front of everyone and there was 20 euro in it from say the Murphys.

NickNickleby

Deleted User wrote: »

Excuse my ignorance but why is a bouquet something worth going back for?

In days of yore, a strategically placed bouquet was used to hide a bump.

the beer revolu

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Excuse my ignorance but why is a bouquet something worth going back for?

With you there.

I also seem to be alone in not seeing the big deal over a funeral at the church before a wedding.

NickNickleby

NickNickleby wrote: »

In days of yore, a strategically placed bouquet was used to hide a bump.

And before that, to hide the smell of the bride. :pac:

How could you not have one to walk up the aisle!

whitey1

I was at a work wedding years ago and the grooms family (in particular his sister) did not like the bride and made no secret of the fact

They accused her of being a snob because she wouldn’t go camping with them and stayed at a hotel down the street whenever they went on vacation

Anyway the ructions started a few weeks before the wedding when the grooms sister found out her kids were selected to hand out programs at the church......instead of the more coveted roles such as flower girl and Paige boy.

It was so bad that she announced she was boycotting the wedding....which was a relief to everyone involved. What she didn’t tell people was that she was only boycotting the ceremony, she had every intention of coming to the reception

Anyway during the reception she got into a yelling match with the groom (her brother) and the bride intervened and told her that if she wasn’t there to have a good time, she was free to leave

Well that was a red rag to a bull and she lunged at the bride l, used some choice language (including the C word) and actually ripped the headdress from her head

At that stage, another brother intervened and forcibly removed her from the reception

Iguarantee

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

a bride can't can walk up the aisle without one.

FYP

NickNickleby

the beer revolu wrote: »

With you there.

I also seem to be alone in not seeing the big deal over a funeral at the church before a wedding.

Well, if the groom leaves the bouquet behind, the bride can borrow a wreath. Win/Win.:pac:

HildaOgdenx

pgj2015 wrote: »

it would have been funny if they opened a card in front of everyone and there was 20 euro in it from say the Murphys.

Or an empty card

Beatty69

Deleted User wrote: »

Excuse my ignorance but why is a bouquet something worth going back for?

Front of dress very plain deliberately because the bouquet was a beautiful display of my favourite flowers. But yeah, you're probably right, not all that important but think of someone walking down the aisle with nothing to hold. It just looks weird.

Also, in relation to the bouquet I had fresh flowers in my hair also to match the bouquet and the florist put it on a REALLY heavy hair clip, killed my head all day. I forgot to bring a hairbrush in my overnight bag and had to ask the staff next morning for a brush to get my hair back to normal. :D:D

chooseusername

Deleted User wrote: »

Excuse my ignorance but why is a bouquet something worth going back for?

You can't have a wedding without the bouquet toss!
Must be done outside, on grass, uneven ground and at least half
the catchers must be drunk.

Turfcutter

The speeches get tiresome when 6 or 7 people get up and repeat the same stuff.
When each of them thanks the hotel (for doing what they're paid to do), the priest, the singer in the church.
Like ffs, think on your feet and cut all that stuff out once it has been said 5 times already.

It always sounds wooden when someone is reading verbatim from a script. The worst one I heard was a person reading a speech written for them and they couldn't make out the hand writing.

saabsaab

chooseusername wrote: »

You can't have a wedding without the bouquet toss!
Must be done outside, on grass, uneven ground and at least half
the catchers must be drunk.

I don't think that is done at many weddings.

chooseusername

saabsaab wrote: »

I don't think that is done at many weddings.

Now that you say it, I haven't seen it in a while.
Made for a lot of nervous boyfriends.

spacetweek

Before my own wedding, we needed to head into the marriages office in Dublin to get the paperwork. I worked across the Liffey from it so sauntered over on time. No sign of herself.
Sent a text, no response. Didn't answer the phone. Now she's 15 mins late. Staff are asking me where she is. Thought I'd been stood up!

Getting increasingly alarmed, finally she rang me. Someone had crashed into her! Our car was banjaxed but thankfully it was low speed so no injuries. There was a pregnant woman as a passenger in the other car too.

We did the paperwork a few weeks later. Her boss rang her looking for assistance with a f***king Excel spreadsheet while she was meant to be filling in her part and kept her on the phone for 30 minutes. I said, really loudly so he'd hear, "Does he know where you are right now?"

C**t.

pgj2015

spacetweek wrote: »

Before my own wedding, we needed to head into the marriages office in Dublin to get the paperwork. I worked across the Liffey from it so sauntered over on time. No sign of herself.
Sent a text, no response. Didn't answer the phone. Now she's 15 mins late. Staff are asking me where she is. Thought I'd been stood up!

Getting increasingly alarmed, finally she rang me. Someone had crashed into her! Our car was banjaxed but thankfully it was low speed so no injuries. There was a pregnant woman as a passenger in the other car too.

We did the paperwork a few weeks later.

were you thinking it was a bad omen?

L1011

chooseusername wrote: »

You can't have a wedding without the bouquet toss!
Must be done outside, on grass, uneven ground and at least half
the catchers must be drunk.

I've seen one bouquet toss at the ~10 weddings I've been at. Its not that common at all.

spacetweek

HBC08 wrote: »

I was at a massive rural wedding about 10 years ago.The speeches went on for 2 and a half hours and about 90 mins of that was the groom gushing and repeatedly getting emotional about his new wife.
During the wedding somebody told the bride that the groom had been riding a work colleague all along and was still at it,the bride didnt believe it and thats when more people chimed in to tell her it was true.
The poor girl still went on the honeymoon, she must have been in shock or something.When they got back they left the airport in separate cars and that was the end of that.
It was shocking to me that so many people knew about what was going on but still let the whole charade go ahead.

Why, why would people tell the bride on her wedding day about this? And ruin her wedding?

saabsaab

spacetweek wrote: »

Why, why would people tell the bride on her wedding day about this? And ruin her wedding?

Why didn't they speak up beforehand?

JayRoc

spacetweek wrote: »

Before my own wedding, we needed to head into the marriages office in Dublin to get the paperwork. I worked across the Liffey from it so sauntered over on time. No sign of herself.
Sent a text, no response. Didn't answer the phone. Now she's 15 mins late. Staff are asking me where she is. Thought I'd been stood up!

Getting increasingly alarmed, finally she rang me. Someone had crashed into her! Our car was banjaxed but thankfully it was low speed so no injuries. There was a pregnant woman as a passenger in the other car too.

We did the paperwork a few weeks later. Her boss rang her looking for assistance with a f***king Excel spreadsheet while she was meant to be filling in her part and kept her on the phone for 30 minutes. I said, really loudly so he'd hear, "Does he know where you are right now?"

C**t.

Why didn't she say "I can't talk, I'm getting married"?

rainbowtrout

JayRoc wrote: »

Why didn't she say "I can't talk, I'm getting married"?

Why did she even answer the phone?

Leg End Reject

JayRoc wrote: »

Why didn't she say "I can't talk, I'm getting married"?

It was paperwork before the wedding, not during the actual ceremony.

But, as above, she shouldn't have answered the phone.

rn

God speaking of garter and bouquet tossing... Remember one wedding in the early 90's, country affair. Probably 200 guests and another 200 afters, a time when people would go to the afters. Place was heaving.

Fooking bouquet thrown, a young girl, probably 15-16 is the lucky lady. Garter then removed from the bride and thrown by groom. Some old bachelor in his late 50's wins it. And has to put it on yer ones leg with his teeth. Cringy music, audience shouting "higher, higher". Yer man making the most of it. And nobody batted an eye at this at the time. Shocking stuff when I think back.

The J Stands for Jay

chooseusername wrote: »

You can't have a wedding without the bouquet toss!
Must be done outside, on grass, uneven ground and at least half
the catchers must be drunk.

Extra points for having a lake or other water feature behind the catchers.

The J Stands for Jay

L1011 wrote: »

I've seen one bouquet toss at the ~10 weddings I've been at. Its not that common at all.

It depends on the people. I've only been to one where it wasn't done. I've been to one where a garter toss was done as well.

fryup

BailMeOut wrote: »

The wedding up until the group vomiting was however really good!

best quote of the thread? :pac:

KevRossi

Ah the bouquet toss. Was at one where the bride was tossing it to her younger sister, she was on the verge of getting engaged. Everyone knew she was meant to get it, but some other woman ran in and literally shouldered her out of the way in the best Ladies GAA fashion and caught it. Was as pleased as punch about it.

Bride's sister fell onto the gravel path, got the usual bad scrapes and a bit of blood on her hands and knees that you get from something like that. Dress was dirtied. Her hairdo was a mess, sort of beehive job that she had to wear down for the rest of the night.

I've seen the video, it's somewhere between cruel and funny. I shouldn't laugh watching it, but I do. Thing is the woman who caught it was a +1 of someone and we haven't a notion who she is, or who brought her.

castletownman

KevRossi wrote: »

Ah the bouquet toss. Was at one where the bride was tossing it to her younger sister, she was on the verge of getting engaged. Everyone knew she was meant to get it, but some other woman ran in and literally shouldered her out of the way in the best Ladies GAA fashion and caught it. Was as pleased as punch about it.

Bride's sister fell onto the gravel path, got the usual bad scrapes and a bit of blood on her hands and knees that you get from something like that. Dress was dirtied. Her hairdo was a mess, sort of beehive job that she had to wear down for the rest of the night.

I've seen the video, it's somewhere between cruel and funny. I shouldn't laugh watching it, but I do. Thing is the woman who caught it was a +1 of someone and we haven't a notion who she is, or who brought her.

I made a show of myself during a bouquet toss at a cousin's wedding years ago.

Bearing in mind I am male, I had no reason to be in the shake up to begin with. Anyway, the bouquet was thrown and I acrobatically dived across the dance-floor and caught it one-handed ahead of two women "grappling" for it. An NFL wide receiver wouldn't have as good hands in the end-zone.

I thought it was hilarious, but I was immediately sat on a chair up beside the DJ and told not to move as the bride threw the bouquet in again.

Another sibling in the same family had their wedding a year later, and I was effectively barred from going next or near the dance-floor until the DJ set began

PhilOssophy

Haven't seen the bouquet toss for a while, mainly because people getting married are older now and the friends are probably a bit embarrassed to get in!