Mortgage, baby, life

jackass111

Not sure where this belongs

Hey, current times are wrecking my future plans.

Trying to get planning for 2 years at this stage, god only knows how long it will take to build and also to afford it.

No houses for sale in the area.

Nearing 40 and want to get the family started ASAP, partner will have to leave job to have child, no maternity, this in turn could affect mortgage as she is on the higher wage (mush higher)

Just wanted to get that off my chest.

What do people do, rent maybe and build later?

Getting planning, rent for a while and then build?

Anyone been through similar, just a bit lost with things

OscarBluth

How old is your partner? If she is the higher earner, why will she have to leave work to have a child? Surely she could just take minimum mat leave at statutory then go back? Honestly, we would have really struggled to buy a house and get a mortgage with childcare costs built in so we had to get the house first: you have the cost of childcare and something like 300/month taken out of your affordability. If you can find a way to draw down mortgage before child, its the best way. We're currently looking to remortgage and trying to do it before a second mat leave starts as again, it would be too difficult. (Also be aware that if you're married, you can share tax credits on maternity: you can't do this if just living together)

Is there a reason why you have to build, or to stay in the area? If planning has taken two years, what is the hold up? Is it being rejected?

Your situation sounds unusual, but in general I think for most people trying to figure out how to do it with kids and house purchases: If its possible to get a house in a year, get a house first. If you're 30, wait a few more years. If you're closer to 40, figure out whats more important to you: the risk of not conceiving, or needing intervention like IVF, or the risk of being stuck in rented accommodation. And what sacrifices you're willing or able to make re: moving to a different area. Its tough, especially at the moment. But there are no guarantees about being able to get pregnant when you decide.

shesty

Why will she have to leave her job to have a child?That sounds odd.

jackass111

Thanks for the advice.

Work is abroad and wouldn't be able to continue it after having a child so no option but to leave the job.

Planning has been a nightmare, but getting there.

Might just have to follow through with planning and buy a house until we can get around to building in a few years.

I believe planning lasts 5 years, and maybe prices will have come down by then.

Or else it's rent and go ahead with the build.

Everything seems to be going against us at the moment, just very frustrating.

Ray Palmer

https://boards.ie/discussion/comment/117630687#Comment_117630687

Whatever your view is is your view but is is she has to leave her job because she wouldn't want to be away from the child? There shouldn't be any restriction on her employment terms. Your personal desires are as valid but when talking financial plans personal views/desires and wishes are what has to compromise the most.

If you ever think the world in conspiring against you stopping what you want then you have a different issue which you need to deal with. You will live a miserable life thinking like that because at anytime you think an unknown force is messing with you. My father in law has done this all his life and it is not a happy existence. It can also be signs of developing mental illness. The rain doesn't care if you get wet it doesn't feel anything

Mrs OBumble

What are her career plans for once off-shore work is no longer feasible?

Would it be better get into this line of work here first, and then have children while protected by Irish employment laws?

If you own a house you won’t get planning as you have no housing need.

If your partner is on a higher wage have you considered doing the childcare?

Is it not viable to move where her work is if she earns more?

And buy there ? You have mentioned where she’s working, v. unusual to have no maternity benefit.

Also agree with previous poster sharing tax credits if married is a no-brainer.

Depends where she works really but since you earn less it would seem to make the most sense for ye to move there, share the tax credits (if married), for you to do more of the childcare and have your partner as the main earner. And to buy near where she works.

Also as other poster said pregnancy is no guarantee.

Is that an option you have considered?

If you’re not flexible on location at all why?

You earn considerably less but have a site I assume.

Can your partner get work within a commutable distance of your where you intend to build ?

This is something I had to do myself. I did a second degree part-time in order to get work near my husband as work with my previous qualification was oversupplied in the area. I now have a permanent position close to where my husband works which I would not have without this second qualification.

We also bought 30 mins away from his home village in order to afford a house with some land around it. This was unaffordable for us in his home parish and for this reason we decided to compromise. A larger amount of land and privacy rather than basically a house built on a small site with little privacy. We also bought a house as we are not ‘local’ so would not get planning in that area’

Maybe there are options you have not considered. In my case the compromises made were well worth it.