Liveline: Thread with no name, Host with no shame

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121051767#Comment_121051767

Or Dubs with strong Culchie roots, I knew one or two.

Tow

A bit of butter, you can't go wrong.

NeinNeinNein

How Fathead likes to eat his bread. Utterly sh1te radio.

Tow

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121051789#Comment_121051789

Dat be de culchie in dem.

Tow

Joe, me aul gran used to buy de Tayto fresh from de oil vats.

NeinNeinNein

Do your duty, Mr Warfield.

Atlantic Dawn

The Way We Were is back next Wednesday to talk about de old shopping experiences of the likes of H Williams, Woolworths, Liptons, Roches Stores n dat, I suspect Joe will have a slot so to speak.

And that, cawlurs, was the long tale of how Joe gathered his rotundness.

sligeach

Joe calling the sweets having "an acquired taste". This from the filthy ####### who likes marmalade. 🤮

calculator

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121051824#Comment_121051824

That programme is the third world version of reeling in the years

Deeec

Listening to this show you would think that the ordinary public of Ireland have no problems whatsoever

The quality of liveline has really gone down, Joe talking endlessly about nonsense topics. Its a disgrace that he is paid so much,

Atlantic Dawn

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121051836#Comment_121051836

It's like it was all made on a Friday evening with a studio next to the RTÉ canteen with contributors given a €200 voucher for Dunnes for their time.

LambshankRedemption

Here we are on the eve of Funny Friday, I bid you all a nice weekend. Its safe to say I'd rather be plucking chickens or decalwing cats than listen to what is considered comedy from Belfast tomorrow.

calculator

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121051840#Comment_121051840

I was gonna go with TY project but yours works too 🤣

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121051841#Comment_121051841

I believe Stretched Funny Friday is concluding in the Europa Hotel on 19th September, Cawlur 😉 where Joe will be delivering a treatise on sophisticated scams.

furiousox

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121051841#Comment_121051841

One phone call is all it will take to get the feckin thing cancelled, one phone call.....😃

Dan Jaman

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121051789#Comment_121051789

Dat's because every Dub is only two generations away from howking cow shite out of the byre, according to our Agricultural Correspondent, Joe.

Dan Jaman

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121052199#Comment_121052199

8 sticks of Belfast Rock, you can see the lettering through it.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121052199#Comment_121052199

Can anyone do Brian Warfield impersonation?

Joe now like a 🐖 in 💩 settled into his executive suite with his guard of sweets given free to him in Newry, along with an extra insulin supply.

So what kind of “Funny Friday jokes” might best go down like de Toytanic up in Belfast?

“Welcome to Fanny Froyday, coming from de wonderful Toytanic Belfast. We have back our great old friend Sil Fox, go ahead Sil!”

1. Why did the iceberg refuse to play cards with the Titanic?

  Because it always ended up giving away its "cool"!

2. How did the captain communicate with the iceberg?

  They used "ice-cream" signals!

3. Why did the Titanic bring a ladder to the party?

  Because it wanted to "raise the bar"!

4. What did the ocean say to the Titanic when it sank?

  "You just couldn't stay afloat, could you?"

“Doc Savage, share your great wit wit is so to speak!”

1. Why did the leprechaun move to Belfast?

  He heard they had the best "craic" in town, and he couldn't resist the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow!

2. What do you call a Belfast person who can juggle?

  A "Titanic Toss-er"!

3. Why did the Belfast chef become a comedian?

  Because they realized their cooking skills were more likely to "crack" a joke than an egg!

4. How do you spot a Belfast person at a party?

  They're the ones expertly dancing the "Titanic Shuffle"!

“Cawlurs don’t leave your seats, I’ve some puns fer ya…

1. Why did the peace wall go on a diet?

  It wanted to be "wall-thin" and promote a lighter atmosphere!

2. How do peace walls communicate with each other?

  They use "brick-phones" for a direct line of communication!

3. What do you call a peace wall that tells jokes?

  A "wall of laughter" spreading joy and unity!

4. Why did the peace wall become a comedian?

  It wanted to break down barriers with "wall-tertaining" humor!

… I know yiz are all falling over in yer seats!”

“The great great Al Goran will now do impersonations and tell you who dey do be…”

an Paisley: Well, Gerry, I must say, you and I have quite the history, don't we?

Gerry Adams: Indeed, Ian. We've had our fair share of disagreements, to say the least.

Ian Paisley: Ah, but that's what makes it interesting, doesn't it? The back-and-forth, the banter. It's like a political ping-pong match!

Gerry Adams: Aye, you could say that. But I must admit, Ian, your booming voice and fiery speeches always managed to grab attention.

Ian Paisley: Oh, Gerry, you flatter me! But let's not forget your skills in negotiation. You always had a way of finding common ground, even in the most challenging situations.

Gerry Adams: Well, Ian, sometimes you just have to be persistent and patient. It's all about building bridges, even if they are metaphorical.

Ian Paisley: Bridges, you say? Well, I suppose we could use a few more of those, couldn't we? Maybe we should start a joint construction business!

Gerry Adams: (laughs) Now, that would be quite the sight, Ian. But perhaps we can leave the construction work to others and focus on finding peace instead.

“Thank you Al, now one of our audience has volunteered to give us an A Capella rendition of his favourite song, we haven’t had to rehearse as I believe he’s got it all off perfectly in his bewriful baritone voyis… go ahead, Cawlur”

🎶🎶🎶🎶

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA 

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA 

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA 

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA 

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA 

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA 

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA 

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA 

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA 

Ooh ah up the 'RA, say ooh ah up the 'RA 

Ooh ah up the ….”

”And we take a long ad break,…”

sound of sirens

Ray Farcy: “Eh I dunno, I dunno, was given the buttons early, I dunno, I dunno… play some music there Jenny”

Atlantic Dawn

Someone from Give My Head Peace is joining the FF crew tomorrow, that show makes Mrs Brown's Boys look like box office comedy material...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pdGP2HpqAMs

Tow

Can Joe not drop into Wightbus and sort out de missing busses for de chisslers?Brexit (insert Joes pronunciation) or no Brexit, it is in de national interest.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121053374#Comment_121053374

Brexit is what Joe will be asking to be brought to his suite at 8am tomorrow morning, a Big Ulster Froy.

Archduke Franz Ferdinand

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121053505#Comment_121053505

Have de rennies on stand by cawlur, by de way, do dey still make de rennies out in sallynoggin? Can someone call in and let us know….

Archduke Franz Ferdinand

We have de Manager of de rennies factory on de line line now…..

Atlantic Dawn

I was on a Wright Bus StreetCar, well ahead of it's time lookswise for 2006...

Mena Mitty

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121051644#Comment_121051644

But n'er a mention of Coddle..v-e-r-y interesting.

Mena Mitty

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121051767#Comment_121051767

I'd say Joeen would be a Cricket man or maybe Bowls.

Tow

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121053724#Comment_121053724

Or may by a game of Croquet Cawlur.

https://www.tcd.ie/Sport/facilities/college-outdoor/