Mental Health Issues

carzony

Hi All, 

I'm currently dealing with a lot of issues that's getting the better of me.

My Mental Health has really declined in the past year or so. I've been suffering on and off with depression, nasty thoughts, extreme anger, obsessive thoughts, extreme sadness at times and constant issues with my personal appearance.  

I'm not happy with my current job or life in general but finding it very difficult to make changes due to lack of motivation.  

I've taken sick leave which made me feel better for a time. Despite being off work for 5 months I don't feel I can return to work as i'm still suffering. 

Would there be any alternative to visiting the GP? I find it difficult to discuss these issues with anyone but do feel I need some kind of help. 

Thanks all. 

Gremlinertia

Did the gp put refer you to a local mental health unit?. Are you looking for a support group? I'm guessing being on sick leave makes paying for a psychologist or therapist difficult, i have found Aware to be relatively good..

qwerty13

“Would there be any alternative to visiting the GP? I find it difficult to discuss these issues with anyone but do feel I need some kind of help.”

I feel your pain OP. I had a similar incident in my past, albeit shorter. I know it might be difficult to hear, but do talk to your GP. Unless you’re looking for alternatives because you found your GP judgemental/unhelpful??

If you have cover to do so, or can afford to do it privately, I’d say book sessions with a therapist. Even the act of doing so helped nudge me a little to a more positive frame of mind. The freedom to say whatever you want to a therapist/counsellor is incredibly freeing in my experience (and I say that as a person who doesn’t really like talking in-depth about things). Mine was recommended by my GP, but I don’t think it’s a very well regulated profession, so do check them out beforehand.

There is a chance that you might need medication and counselling, so it is good to keep in touch with your GP (or change GP, if you aren’t comfortable with your current one).

Friends have found meditation and various mental health apps worked for them. They never worked much for me though. But worth checking out though, as a no/low cost and easy to access option.

Wishing you all the best.

HildaOgdenx

I agree with previous posters. You might find it helpful to attend counselling. Have a look at the attached link.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2057956018/how-to-find-help-a-counsellor-therapist-psychologist

Some companies have an Employee Assistance Programme (EAP) which enables employees to avail of counselling etc, completely confidentially. If you have private Health Insurance, some providers also include sessions with therapists in their cover. Also some colleges such as PCI college, offer low cost counselling. I'm just using them as an example, I'm sure that there are others who do likewise, as obviously money can be an issue, when out of work longterm.

https://www.pcicollege.ie/counselling-service/lowcostcounselling

Do keep in touch with your GP, and explore all options that might help. Some employers are a lot better than others when it comes to bridging the gap, to enable employees to return. It can be quite a leap, after a prolonged absence. If your employer is helpful, in that respect, that makes a big difference.

For the moment, just try to focus on what will help you, look at the various options mentioned by pp, and think about the return to work, if and when you feel able.

All the best.

Citrus_8

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058212304/mental-health-issues

Your problems are long-term. You should have visited a psychologist before having these issues - just as a routine check up every 6 or so sessions a year. But if you've never done that before, I suppose, the beginning will be the hardest. GP are useless in this case - you need to open up and start talking to a mental help professional.

Ave Sodalis

I would be very similar to you in that I find it very, very difficult to open up. There are, however, services both in Ireland and online where you do not have to speak but you can text instead if you find that easier. Then, the more you practice opening up, the easier it becomes.

global23214124

I'd say go to your GP. You don't have to go super in-depth about everything thats going on, just give a summary and how you have been feeling. Its not going to be anything they haven't heard before. They should be able to put you in contact with services in your area.

carzony

Thanks all,

I've yet to take action or seek help but your replies have helped.

I'm trying to ignore the problems but it's harder to do that some data.

Thanks again 👍

OP, the pandemic has rendered the last year about the worst ever in my life, and I feel very like you do in most respects, except fortunately I’m confident in my appearance as I lost some needed weight.

The situation that has befallen much of society over this past time has left many of us feeling extremely depressed, angry, intolerant, sleepless, and that at times life is almost pointless. So do t feel alone in how you feel, I hear this is not st all uncommon. The mental health fallout of the pandemic is taking its toll, and you feel worse before you begin to feel better. We need to “tolerate our intolerance” to even embark on the journey of healing. One thing for sure, counsellors, psychologist & psychiatrists are going to have a boom time, if we can look on it wryly like that.

Best of luck to you.

I would suggest finding a counsellor. Doctors are trained in medical issues not emotions. A doctor can ensure that you are physically healthy.

I've found existential therapy to be helpful.

Perhaps, if you could source a pet.

Spend time with children, they've a great perspective on life.

Get out of bed by nine o clock, I created a ritual when I wasn't working by having my breakfast once the nine o clock chat show begins.

I would suggest make small changes that show that you've the capacity to better your life. For example, a new pillow might feel good, get it

Create miny projects for yourself

Tell me how

OP, unfortunately, we don't have a time machine, but for anyone else reading this, please do not spend 5 months out of work without seeking professional help for mental health issues.

Really sorry you have gone through that.

It's easy for me to say, cause I have managed to do it before, but opening up to the appropriate person is critical to allowing them to be best able to help you. Doing so with your GP is useful because they are likely to know you to some degree already (which may be the reason some people struggle to open up to them).

Aside from the difficulty in being vulnerable with someone, it can be a challenge to find the counsellor who works best for you. Don't be disheartened if you find you don't click immediately with the first one you may see.

On the positive side, I think once you take the step to get formal support, a weight will be lifted off your shoulders and you will no longer feel you are fighting this on your own.

Best of luck.

alannoone

Sorry to hear youre struggling for so long OP.

If you hurt your leg, pull a muscle you would go to a physiotherapist. If your mind is in pain, strained or not feeling quite right, it needs a specialist too, go see a therapist. Its not mental health, its just health.

I know, Ive been in bad places, had to leave a job with severe anxiety. I got a councilor who taught me CBT, a skillset that should IMO be thought to kids in school, its that important. A decent therapist will help identify the issues you have and come up with a treatment plan. The sooner you get started, the sooner you start getting better.

Dont go to the GP to get a referral, that will take months, if youre lucky. Find a therapist yourself. There are lots of great therapists available with the specific skills to help you get back to a good place.

It seems tough now but its going to get easier and youre going to be stronger because of it. youre going to be ok.

Hi OP. A lot of good advice on how you should find a GP and a therapist or both. So I won't repeat that advice.

You said in the OP however that you wanted alternatives to that. That does not mean all the advice above is not great - and you should take it on board - but you did specifically ask for alternative advice too.

Have you considered getting a personal trainer who will show up every day and get you out doing certain things? You might find that might undermine your lack of motivation issue for example. Having someone show up at fixed times and periods to say "Right off your ass" can be quite beneficial. If you have friends or relatives you can discuss the issues with and tell them you need someone to show up and get you up and motivated - that might help too.

There are quite a few podcasts - Blindboy would be the Irish example - discussing issues of "dark thoughts" and some of the things you indicated were an issue above. A lot of his podcasts are nonsense too - but if you find and single out the mental health podcasts he does you might find a lot there useful.

In terms of motivation - when people identify that there is much in their life they are not happy with - motivation can be an issue. And rather than improve your lot in live you find it all too overwhelming and instead end up spending months doing nothing beneficial at all. Worse - looking back on that wasted 5 months can then feed further into our feelings of low self esteem - failure - depression and further fuel the lack of motivation.

A good activity therefore is to identify - go old school with some pen and paper lists - the main topics where you are unhappy with your life. On a single A5 or A5 size note paper just list nothing but headings like "Health" "Appearance" "My Job" "Relationships" and so on. Then on one more page for each of those headings list the things you are particularly unhappy with. So under "Appearance" you might find "I hate my old tatty clothes" or "I hate by spare tyre beer belly" or "I hate my hair" and so on.

After this identify the things on those lists that you have no control over and ones you could actually take owner ship of and change. Maybe make a list of the specific changes you could make short and long term. Don't like your clothes, a quick short term solution is go buy new ones. Something like a beer belly - ok that takes much longer. And so on.

When you have this final list of things you could actually change and control just pick one. And get after that single one for awhile. The list might seem long and overwhelming but instead of spending another 5 months giving in to that - focus some time on just bettering one single thing.

What you might find - as many do - is the motivation required to get after that one thing is much much less and so you can more easily overwhelm the lack of motivation. What you might also find is that motivation begets motivation. When you start getting after one thing and getting on top of it - setting little goals and hitting them - you breed more motivation. So next time you go back to the list you might hit 2 or 3 of the things on it at once.

Do not let looking back at the last months where you achieved no improvements get you down. What is done is done. Wipe it from your mind in that sense. But at the same time - ask yourself if you had focused on one or two small things you were not happy with and had gotten after them for the last 5 months. Nothing but that 1 or 2 things - where would you be today? Probably still in a similar place but with those 2 things much improved and ready to take on the next 1/2 things. That's where you could be in the next 5 months too. So what about where you could be in 10? 15? 20 months from now?

It must all seem so huge right now to you - so break it down and pick your first smaller battles and maybe you will find it less overwhelming.

Another thing you could do is read my posts to the recent thread about an alcohol problem. There I wrote at length to the OP about "triggers" and "trigger situations". I recommended she identify the times and situations and triggers that make her crave alcohol and then pre-determine to avoid those situations. The same can be true of "bad thoughts" and the like you describe above. Are there times where you notice a pattern that bad thoughts and so forth hit you more often than others? If so identify ways that you can pre-determine not to be in those situations. If they tend to hit on a Friday night when you are sitting at home for example then make a new hobby to be doing something else - even something entirely trivial - like walking around your town centre for 2/3 hours of a friday night just playing pokemon go on your phone or something.

Seek to identify the cues and triggers where and when your mental health issues are at their worst and arrange long before the fact not to be in that place and avoid those triggers. It might sound silly to go and read a simple book - maybe young adult literature - on a park bench every evening for a couple of hours but you might be shocked at just how deeply it changes your emotions and perspectives to be breaking the cycle in that way and being out in the fresh air and giving your mind some pleasant distraction. I recommend starting with the book "The warrior kid" by Jokko Willink. A simple read but quite uplifting and motivating too.