Based on common posting patterns/volumes define the average boards.ie poster

The average poster who doesn't exist appears to me to be:

over 30

grumpy indigenous Irish

deeply conflicted as to whether they are more green or more left politically

wears an expensive watch and is building a collection.

worships Elon Musk and is awaiting a powerbank to go with their PV/Solar solution so naturally a home owner.

dabbles in cryptocurrencies

When not riding a carbon framed bike which they refer to using a term which isn't "bicycle" drive an expensive EV and isn't afraid to let people know about it.

Thinks 30kmph speed limit is still too fast for the few roads still left in Dublin which they haven't succeeded in replacing with a bus lane.

Wildly Boaring

The green / left bit made me chuckle.

Seen a thread about housing or welfare on here? Pleny Tories knocking about

CGI_Livia_Soprano

Stale, pale, and male.

Impotent.

Listens to radio shows and watches TV shows he hates just so he can comment on them with other deeply cynical and rather nasty oddballs.

CGI_Livia_Soprano

Typically the actual user is a man, aged between forty and sixty, overweight, reasonably well educated (ordinary degree) but suspicious towards anyone who is more educated than them.

They consider themselves to be considered, salt of the earth common sense intellectuals despite never reading anything more challenging than 1984 or a Star Wars novel, they think the Star Wars novel is "actually deeper than you'd expect."

The average boards.ie user is a person who would have been considered very open-minded and "liberal" back in 2005 however they hold the exact same views they held then and think any liberalisation of social issues developed since then is "too far." e.g gay people can get married however trans-people are an abomination.

They are either software developers (not engineers) or taxi drivers. They pride themselves of being hard-working and realistic however any kind of personal inconvenience is treated with a tantrum, such as wearing masks, a greasy kebab delivery being late, washing their hands etc. Everything has to go their way, all the time, and that person will call the manager if they don't get a refund.

The average boards.ie user hates Sinn Fein and thinks Fianna Fail and Fine Gael are the "only real options." No other political party exists. Their entire philosophy is inspired by the Clinton/Blair-era end of history and therefore they think that anything other than the neo-liberal status-quo is "unrealistic."

The average boards.ie holds their beliefs firmly even if they are incredibly out of date, for example bitching about how **** their Irish teacher is more than twenty years after leaving school or bringing every Irish language discussion back to Peig (which hasn't been on the curriculum since 1995). The average boards.ie user thinks everyone younger than them is lazy and feckless even though they haven't exercised more than once a week in twenty years.

The average boards.ie user think they know it all and scorn young people for being arrogant. The average boards.ie user is a spoiled brat with high blood pressure.

Gregor Samsa

The average Boards user is only 6 inches tall, covered in a soft downy fur, and lives in a dolls house. They only eat cinnamon scones and tomato soup. Their favourite song is “Milkshake” by Kelis, but played at half speed. They speak in belches. They have an antenna in their head which receives AM radio, where all their education, knowledge and opinions come from, fed directly into their brain. When cornered, they can turn themselves inside out and digest their enemies by rubbing against them. They use Boards to appear human as part of their mating ritual, laying one egg for every five thanks they receive.

The strangest thing about them is that when prompted they will fall over themselves to post disparaging descriptions of the average Boards user, and all of them incorrectly think they’re the exception to this description.

Now, I must wait and see how many eggs I lay.

EmmetSpiceland

Average boards.ie user is angry, overweight, mid to late 30s or older, doesn’t like change, obsessed with everything WOKE (all caps) to the point they, actively, search for anything that “upsets” them so they can whinge about it online, complains about computers games having too many female characters who aren’t scantly clad and 1 dimensional, “consumes” vast amounts of extreme, hardcore, gonzo pornography and hates having their bigotry pointed out to them.

Very angry.

ErnestBorgnine

Yep mainly people inventing groups of people (that they disagree with) in their minds, that they then compare themselves to favourably on Boards.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118070011#Comment_118070011

Lol. The American colonisation of the Irish mind continues.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118070765#Comment_118070765

Also not very good at using inverted commas. There’s a few very weird and sad people here who like to talk about their sh1ts. And at least one person with multiple accounts pretending to be multiple people, all of them prolific posters except the one who died. Or maybe his tab exploded

In reality Board is an older group than the internet normal (bit younger than the Irish average age), about as in woke as the normal off internet guy, but certainly married.

maccored

are they any good on roundabouts?

mariaalice

Any women on boards just wondering.

Mostly middle aged/old....like mid 30s upwards id guess

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118070506#Comment_118070506

God bless you

Gregor Samsa

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118080033#Comment_118080033

Thanks. I laid two eggs so far. I ate one. No different to any other Boardsie.

AndrewJRenko

I'm reminded of what Sid Vicious said about the man in the street when I think of the average Boards user.

banie01

Fúck me if I don't tick 4 of @haphaphap set of boxes 😮

It's like Derren Brown has appeared on boards and is looking into my soul! Get outta my head, ya Bollox!

I can't get any younger 😤 so it's time to ditch the watches and luckily I've already sold most of my crypto 😳

I think Elon is a twat, and as of yet have no solar tho I do own a home.

And as for a bike? Sure why would I? I'm saving the world with my free travel pass one bus ride at a time whilst the Mrs has the car.

And as for speed limits? Are they not a cruising suggestion? Like I can totally blow past them if I need to?

30kmph.... Sure I could cycle faster than that of I could be arsed getting on a bike! But fúck bikes like!

Only place I want to see Lycra and Carbon is in amputee porn, and even then I wouldn't watch it!😂

Wibbs

^^

Boomer.

Burt Renaults

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118082136#Comment_118082136

They're definitely disproportionately represented on here alright.

If I could define the average Boards poster in one word (ideally, a word that wouldn't get me banned), it'd probably be 'jaded'. There's a lot on here who fit that description. It's an easy trap to fall into as you get older and I don't envy them one bit.

Potential-Monke

People pay that much attention to this place?

is_that_so

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118083544#Comment_118083544

Nowhere near as much as they once might have done but you can be sure that media types and maybe some politicos dip in from time to time looking for nuggets and ideas and to get the "pulse of the nation".

The J Stands for Jay

The average boards user compares Ireland unfavourably to other countries, using only stereotypes, despite having no knowledge of the other country.

They believe that doing anything about the environment is pointless because China builds 17 coal powered power plants a minute, which are then burned in coal powered power plant powered power plants. They spend a disproportionate amount of time attempting to buy things they don't need of want from AliExpress and Wish.

mariaalice

mildly introverted, like their own company.

Nermal

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118070357#Comment_118070357

Take that back, I'm not overweight.

Burt Renaults

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118083737#Comment_118083737

Kept himself to himself. Nobody expected him to do this.

banie01

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118083832#Comment_118083832

I chortled at this one 😉

EmmetSpiceland

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118083574#Comment_118083574

Haha, I doubt that, very much. Boards.is users had Peter Casey streets ahead in the “presidential vote” poll.

Any media type using boards as a “barometer” for public opinion will be greatly misled.

mariaalice

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118083992#Comment_118083992

But it's handy for generating ideas for some content though and some political advisers definitely post on one forum on boards which I don't think s a good idea.

whisky_galore

Someone who both hates and loves cyclists.

The age profile would invariably lead to a load of MAMILs posting here. A decline in posting activity in the golf forum probably lead to an uptick in lads asking for advice on what carbon fibre bike to buy in the cycling forum.

Wanderer78

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118084098#Comment_118084098

what forum would that be?

Ubbquittious

I'd say the average boards user is confused and wondering what they're still doing here so long after the site has died

Wanderer78

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118085238#Comment_118085238

...excellent, so this is what death is like....

i like it....

Rothko

Posters just describing people that they don't like. No surprise there.

AndrewJRenko

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118084098#Comment_118084098

Politicians don't need ideas generated on bulletin boards. People who actually know stuff about the problems of state are the ones who generate ideas.

Ubbquittious

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118089500#Comment_118089500

Pity they generate so few good ones

LLMMLL

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118070357#Comment_118070357

Spot on. They're also married and only friends with their secondary school friends.

Ubbquittious

Average boardsie 2000-2005: Quake player, studying computing in a Dublin college/university. Lives in a house share, mad for the sesh, fell out with his parents, hates the culchie place he moved out of, lives almost entirely off of frozen pizzas and doritos.

Average boardsie 2005-2010: Militant atheist, IT support job in Dublin, still lives in same house share, loves a good weekend away in Eastern Europe for a sesh, Drives a TDi Golf

Average boardsie 2010-2015: FG Voter, promoted a rank in IT job, bought a crappy house in the backarse of Dublin or paying a lot of rent cause he's sick of housemates now. Getting slightly tired of hangovers after 10 years of them so dabbling in different substances and the odd sex party. Drives a well worn 5-series.

Average boardsie 2015-2020: Got back into gaming, working for a different IT megacorp now and starting to realise this one is sh1te too. Crappy house is done up now and surrounding area has poshened up. Prefers a romantic weekend away with the missus now to going out with the lads, bought a new 5-series on the Puckleberry-P

Average boardsie 2020-present: Fully paid up FG member, gets lovely warm fuzzy feeling in his belly when he pays his property tax, doesn't bother with the gaming and actually goes outside for a walk and a bit of fresh air now, trying to lose weight from all those doritos down through the years. Working IT job from home, never wants to go back to the office because he hates people now. Looking forward to first holiday abroad since covid with his sprog and missus. Brand new Tesla outside the door or pre-ordered.

Mad_maxx

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118070357#Comment_118070357

impressive how you figured all that out since only joining three months ago

breezy1985

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118078308#Comment_118078308

Like everything on the internet the "women" are actually men trying to get you to send nudes 😂

CGI_Livia_Soprano

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118091420#Comment_118091420

Sure I've been posting for years.

Hamachi

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118091309#Comment_118091309

LOL That gave me a giggle! Pretty harsh bitch slapping to the civil service though!

El Tarangu

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118083992#Comment_118083992

re: Peter Casey - I have zero time for the man, who was essentially a novelty candidate when he declared. I remember laughing at the Boards poll that had him so far ahead... but then he ended up finishing 2nd, with 23% of the vote.

Which is all to say: perhaps Boards is more reflective of the general public than you might think (god help us).

There are all kinds of people on Boards (apart from people up to their mid 20s - why is that a problem though?) - the incessant whining about one particular cohort (it's not the average member) from people who regularly post here also, and could just go to Reddit, is tedious.

Ubbquittious

Reddit is a thankswhoringfest. If you don't thankswhore nobody even gets to see your post

AndrewJRenko

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118091855#Comment_118091855

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118091309#Comment_118091309

They don't need 'ideas'. All the great 'ideas' from all the lads on boards and elsewhere have long been teased out by people who actually know what they're talking about, and are often hugely expensive, counter-productive, short-sighted and more.

Hamachi

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118097550#Comment_118097550

You sound fun. Do you get invited to many parties Andy?

Gregor Samsa

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118097789#Comment_118097789

HA! HA! HA! That’s brilliant! The poster made a comment on a discussion forum expressing an opinion, and then you used that expression of an opinion to summarise his entire personality AND the implications that personally would have on one’s social life! Classic! With a wit like that, I bet you get invited to ALL the parties, but at the same time, I bet all the people at the parties are afraid of saying anything, just in case that razor sharp wit is deployed on them. So the parties are really quiet, except for you saying brilliant stuff. Which sounds like my ideal party. Pity I don’t get invited to them. I’ll certainly be careful what I say with you around! Actually no, do me! Go on, unleash another trademarked Hamachi zinger, like that one about not being invited to parties. “You sound like fun, Gregor. Bet you don’t be invited to parties!” - Ha! Ha! classic!

AndrewJRenko

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118099681#Comment_118099681

In a strange way, it was a great example of "good ideas" that turn out to be not quite so good in the end.

Hamachi

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118099681#Comment_118099681

Gregor, are you off your meds? You should probably get back on them if that little outburst is indicative of your current state of mind.

Well you did ask...

Annasopra

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118078308#Comment_118078308

Nope. full of angry scwhamms