Separation advice on husband leaving family with nothing

ss1987

I know I shouldn’t really be on any forums looking for legal advice but my head could explode with overthinking and debating to myself what to do and where to begin.

so basically I’ve been separated 6 months now from husband of 18 years married for 12 with 2 children together.

I don’t want to bore anyone rambling about my 18 years of good and bad times so I’ll try keep this short and to the point .

About 4 years ago my husband just became a complete stranger who stopped interacting with his family was in constant bad form and became extremely verbally abusive to me anytime he drank alcohol over the last 2 years myself and his children begged him to move out and every time he said drinking would stop and promise things would get better within a week he would start again.

so about six months ago we had 3 days in a row of him drunk and argumentative it was the moment I couldn’t do it anymore to me and our children I told him I was done I had enough he left for the night and rang the next morning telling myself and our children we had 2 days to move out of our house so myself and my children packed what we need and went to stay with my parents and have been here since as it was either leave or stay at home for him to come back and continue doing the same thing.

this is the legal situation I’m in so our home was bought 8 years ago by his mother and the agreement was to pay her so much a month until she got paid back and then it would be officially ours and honestly I don’t care anymore about the house we are happier than we were in a long time even being a bit crowded living in my parents now. but we had to start from scratch and I had put just as much money as my husband into to our home over the 8 years Living there to be left with nothing but a few bags of clothes belong to me and the kids. This is where I need any advice on if I am entitled to look for maybe an agreed lump sum to be made for myself and the kids that’s fair on everyone and help along with the 5% of his €1000 weekly income he considers fair to pay for maintenance to his kids

any advice would be really appreciated

You need legal advice on the house and maintenance issues, though you can start the ball rolling by making an application for a maintenance order, via your local district court office. You don't need a solicitor to do this, and its free. It will take a couple of months for you to get a date, so I'd start with that.

Are you in employment yourself or do you have any form of income? You can apply for free legal aid if you income is below a certain level.

Are either of your children under the age of 7? If so, you may be able to make a claim for One Parent Family Payment (even if you are in employment). Also, if you are not on the mortgage or deeds to the house you can apply for assistance with renting a house, if you are overcrowded.

Contact www.treoir.ie for information on the legal aspects, and Women's Aid for emotional support - it sounds like the relationship you've been living in was abusive and they can support and advise you also.

Dempo1

Awful situation OP and sorry to hear about your troubles. I don't know much about Maintenance issues, Children etc but i have to say your moving out of the house on being essentially forced too is quite shocking as to is the apparent and complete disregard your husband is showing towards his responsibilities.

You need urgent legal advice , at a minimum clarification is required with relation to legal ownership of the Home, you mention the arrangement with your husbands mother this would suggest there's a contract of sorts but regardless as a spouse and assuming husband has an interest in the property you may have some legal and financial entitlements over what is the family Home.

Honestly, no one outside your situation can fully understand or advise but urgently seek legal advice , I wish you well