Funny stuff written in the jacks

veryangryman

One thing ye'd miss about the pub is the jokes written in the gents. One i always laugh at

Written in blue ink: If you are gay, meet me here at 12pm.

Below, Written in black: I'm here every day, but you never show!

Gregor Samsa

Traditionally, our local has a little bit of mistletoe taped above the gloryhole. You’d miss festive touches like that.

Slanty

“ toilet tennis”

” look left”. Written on the door.

”look right” on the left wall and “look left” on the opposite wall!

Got me lovely that did.

black & white

Early 80’s in the jax of a factory in Clare with a good few Belfast lads working there ’Support your local friendly Active Service Unit’

dxhound2005

LOLOAQICI82QB4IP

Fr Tod Umptious

In the now closed The Field pub in Cambridge Massachusetts.

Beside the condom machine.

"For refund, insert baby"

Nodster

Flush twice - it's a long way to the restaurant (Old Students Bar in UCD)

bigmac3

This site is like a bowl of soup, full of big thick country vegetables

corner of hells

"Up the continuinties..."

Up the contuniunieis..."

"Ah **** it , Up the RA."

horsebox1977

Edenmore AOK

Sgt Hartman

Problems?? Prayer works wonders, Prayer works miracles - St Francis

I spotted this written in a few different pub toilets in Limerick approx 20 plus years ago.

Hangdogroad

There was a cafe called Harlequins in Cork off Paul St in the 90s. I remember someone wrote in the toilets "**** students ye all deserve to get mugged".

Feenix

"Louis Walsh fisted Stephen Gately to death" in a pub in town.

Not necessarily funny but memorable/bizarre.

mfceiling

Anyone interested in time travel?

Meet me here last Wednesday at half 2.

BurgerFace

Can't remember the pub but I went to the bog for a piss. Stood at the urinal and pulled out the mickey and proceeded to drain. Looked up and on the wall in front of me was written "The joke is in your hands."

Yeah, thanks for that, mate.

Hangdogroad

In the mens jacks in UCC for years there was a sticker of Ronald Mcdonald stuck on the wall of one of the cubicles and written on it in biro "dirty bastard molests children".

thefallingman

No shooting

mailforkev

“Here I sit all broken hearted, paid 10p and only farted.”

black & white

Can't remember where but years ago in pub jax cubicle, some writing on the wall down near the floor, written at an angle said;

You are now sh**ting at an angle of 45 Degrees

cj maxx

Seen in NY

Workers of the world unite

Black men of the world unite

Dyslexics of the world untie

Poochie05

UCD, 1980s, back when we had to content with sheets of grease proof paper for bog roll

UCD toilet paper is like John Wayne

It's rough, it’s tough and it takes **** from nobody!

DJIMI TRARORE

Circa 1990

Jesus saves!

Not as good as Bonner

the 12 th man

Near the bottom of the door with a small gap at the bottom of the door in a cubicle and you only see it if you're sitting on the jacks,,"Beware the Limbo dancers"..

For Forks Sake

• God is dead -  Nietzsche 
•  Nietzsche  is dead - God

ecospace

In a jacks on a site in Dublin... "Some come here to sit and think, others come here to **** and stink, but I come here to scratch my balls and read the bullshit on the walls."

Charles Babbage

Not funny amusing, but funny odd. I was passing through Cologne on the 80s and had breakfast in a cafe not too far from the station. I went to the bog and on the back of cubicle door was an entire paragraph As Gaelige, a rant on the limitations of West Germany. That was unexpected, I had been behind the Iron Curtain for 5 weeks and had not seen a single word of Irish anywhere.

daithi7

On the back of a door in the men's jacks in college

"Jacinta, if you're reading this, it's all off!!"

daithi7

StevenToast

A story from back in an all boys secondary school in the 90s......... one lucky 6th year by the name of 'Keogh' hooked up with a girl from the nearby convent and met during lunch to get the 'shift'.......he fancied abit more so he proceeded to drop the hand.....it was his first time and he wasnt well versed in the anatomy of the female body....... lets just say he was sticking fingers where he shouldn't have been sticking them!!!....suffice to say that this didnt go down well with the girl and she went straight back to her friends to let them know about poor aul Keogh....

Anyway, it didnt take long for word to eventually get back to Keoghs buddies....

The next day every jax in the school had:

"KIT KAT KEOGH, THE KLINKER TINKER"

plastered everywhere in tippex followed by crude drawings of 4 fingers🖖...it was the talk of the school for weeks!!!!

The school janitors heart was broken from the clean up!

touts

Written on the door of a cubicle of a men's in a student Nightclub in the 90s:

"This is the ladies toilet you drunk pervert".

Now it was actually the men's but the number of confused drunk first years who came hurriedly out of the toilet and then tried to figure out where to go to finish their **** was very entertaining to drunk 2nd years.

Hangdogroad

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118354470#Comment_118354470

Oddly similar experience in Budapest train station in the 00s. It was when Limerick was starting to make the news over gangland feuds. While queuing for my ticket I spotted scratched into the wooden counter "Keanes R rats" and the name of some other prominent scumbag family involved in the feud that I cant remember, dont think it was the Dundons. It was pretty strange to see.

Ash.J.Williams

Somebody wrote “gok gok” in sh1t on the jax wall in Eamon dorans in the mid 90s

Rael

DCU, 1998-2003, 3rd floor of the Computer Applications Building, one of the toilet roll dispensers had an arrow pointing towards the hanging sheets with the words "UCD Arts Degree. Feel free to take one" written on it. Still make me chuckle 😆

Spore

The Yacht pub Clontarf, Circa late nineties. There was a urinal that had a wooden box built around it (presumably to stop the inebriate pissing in a broken urinal) and someone had written in big black marker "tomb of the unknown plumber, play the pipes slowly..." always cracked me up.

Also "pray for twink" written in the same Jacks.

T-Maxx

"For a good time call Veryangryman 555-post1"