GTA for 14yr old …( not COD apologies)

Lisha

Hi all,

(apologies it’s Grand Theft Auto he wants not COD)

my 14yr old son really wants CoD… I’ve always said no as I feel it’s more suited to adults and has an 18cert for a reason. All his friends play it and even all his younger friends play it also.

I know it’s down to personal choice but I’m looking at this with an open mind. Am I over reacting? Should I allow it or am I right not to allow it?

thanks for any opinions,

SuperBowserWorld

This annoys me because it's seen as only a video game. Well video games ain't simple anymore.

And you are right to care. Lots of people don't care or are ignorant or don't care as long as it doesn't effect them.

I can't understand how kids can play 18 cert games which can be in 4k, high frame rate, hdr, photo realistic, graphic, where they are in total control of the action, they play for long long extended periods of time ...

and people say

"it's ok, Johnny's younger brother who's 8 plays it".

"It's only CoD"

Grand theft Auto 5. People say the same. There is a scene early on where someone jokes about violent rape and kicks someone's head in. I can't remember the exact details.

But that's just one game and one scene in 35+ hours.

But maybe this is normal now, and then people wonder why a 73 year old is violently attached in Sligo and a teenager looses and eye in Dublin, or is chased under a train, it goes on and on.

It might not affect your kid but the number of kids playing multiplied by the laws of averages and the time spent and **** happens.

On top of all the other crap they are watching on their phones.

It's not healthy and the guinea pig generation, our kids, have to deal with this and get zero support from society or government to help.

Staplor

It's down to you and your kid, I allow my kid (10) to play spiderman, it's 16's, I wouldn't allow him to play any game like COD. I got the most recent COD and I'm a little spooked out by the level I'm on now, I'm crawling around trying to stab the bad guy, it's tense, it's frightening, it's a world away from when I was 14 and playing these games. I think if you're going against the age ratings, you need to be informed about what you're letting them into. The opinion of randomers on boards.ie isn't the answer, it's down to you and your kid.

melekalikimaka

Theres a reason it is not suitable for children. It is very gory and realistically graphic, the question you should ask, would you allow him watch an 18+ movie, unsupervised, and potentially interact with people over the age of 18 too while playing.

Still stihl waters 3

If you dont want him to play it then don't let him, you're his parent not his friend

Atlantic Dawn

As games go if he was to watch Saving Private Ryan that would have far more impactful death and gore than he will experience with the game itself.

The 'danger' with this game and perhaps any which allow online play is you can't control the conversations over voice and text while the game is being played.

Mr. CooL ICE

I was able to purchase and play a game called Carmageddon when I was 13. I bought it was my own pocket money and my parents hadn't a notion what it was, so I got away with it. It was violent back then but I'm sure it did me no harm as I've never had the urge to hit anybody with my car. But I'm just one person.

But like someone above said, if you wouldn't let them watch an 18s movie, then don't let them play an 18s game.

o1s1n

It's a tough one. On one hand, it's rated 18's, so a classification board have reviewed the content and said it is not suitable for children.

On the other hand, prohibiting a kid from playing a game makes it all that more alluring. I know at that age, if there was media I was 'forbidden' from consuming, you can rest assured that I would find out a way to get my hands on it. (my mam wouldn't let me play Doom, Duke Nukem 3D, Resident Evil and other similar adult games in the 90s when I was 13/14, I'd just play them at my mates)

The call is up to you, as someone above already said, you're the parent - so if you are not happy with your child consuming media meant for adults then stick to it.

Harryd225

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058231810/call-of-duty-for-14yr-old

It seems you are being a bit overprotective, most people playing these games are under 18, as you said most of his friends already have it. If he's that into the game he's probably already watching loads of YouTube videos of the game so there's not much difference letting him play it himself. No point trying to coddle and shelter him from all the bad things in the world until the day he turns 18.

Also kids don't seem to be going out socialising as much anymore these days so letting him interact and socialise with his friends while playing a video game seems the next best option if he spends most of his spare time at home anyway. Best option is to let him play the game and put limits on his gaming time to an hour or two a day and maybe a bit longer on the weekends. It's impossible to shelter kids from this stuff nowadays despite how bad you might want to, putting unfair restrictions on him that most teens freely enjoy will only make him more likely to rebel and start disobeying your rules more and more if he thinks you're being unfair.

awec

It's realistic violence rather than gratuitous gore, there's no severed heads or anything like that. There's no nudity, there's no sex. There is swearing, but again it's not like every second word is fcuk and it stays away from the more colourful stuff.

If you'd let your child watch any movie about war then COD will be fine.

Online I think you can disable the in-game public voice chat.

Harryd225

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118596349#Comment_118596349

That's not possible these days, assuming he has unsupervised internet access (which he should at 14) he's able to freely watch whatever he wants on the internet, the front page of YouTube when you click on it has numerous violent movie scenes.

Lisha

Edit: Apologies I’ve just realised it’s GTA he wants, not CoD. Now you realise how tough my child has it when I’m that dim. I’ve no major issues with CoD… GTA however…. I don’t know…..:end edit

Thanks v much for all the comments. It accurately sums up the arguments going around in my head about this…

I accept I’m protective. I accept that playing a game doesn’t predict how he will behave in real life. But for me the level of (sexual) violence is a bit icky for someone whose social and mental development isn’t fully done yet.

My child is far from perfect, I’m the opposite of the parent who thinks their Johnny can do no wrong. We are all only a few bad decisions away from something serious. I look back at some of the potentially bad situations/decisions I was near at a young age and it’s only luck that saved me. But then in the long run, those situations made me a better person. So maybe I should give in and hope for the best.

Oh I dunno, this parenting lark is over rated at times… I’ll read the comments again and see what feels right when I’ve more time to give to it.

thanks again, every comment is helpful.!

Lisha

It’s GTA he wants not CoD… I heard one thing and typed another.

awec

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118596789#Comment_118596789

I don't think you need to "hope for the best". You're his parent, so you know him best, but in reality playing a game like Call of Duty is going to have no effect on him whatsoever. As far as adult content goes, it's fairly sterile.

The problem with the ratings is they are fairly rigid. Call of Duty and Grand Theft Auto have the same rating for example, but there is literally a chasm between them in terms of content. PUBG is another super popular online game where you also shoot people, see blood and dead bodies and interact with other players, and it's rated 16. 🤷‍♂️

awec

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118596839#Comment_118596839

Yea that's a different kettle of fish entirely.

GTA has content that would make an adult wince, so I'd say no.

Lisha

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118596845#Comment_118596845

Apologies, I’ve no issue with CoD it’s GTA he wants… I’m assuming CoD is ok but GTA is much worse…? Sorry I typed the wrong acronym.

Thanks for the input

awec

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118596856#Comment_118596856

GTA is much, much, much worse.

GTA is absolutely an adult game. Gratuitous violence, sex, nudity, swearing, degrading women etc it's like the full bingo for everything.

Augme

I also think outright banning something is just a lazy way of parenting. At this age he will play GTA at his friend house, he will watch real videos far more violent and graphic then GTA, he will watch movie clips the same.

A good parent will put the time and effort into educating their child about the issues that appear in GTA and how they arent healthy or an acceptable way to behave and speak about people and women. Lazy parents will just ban their child from seeing it and delude themselves into think they've solved the problem.

Your son will be exposed to all the issues that are mentioned in GTA anyway, banning him from playing it won't remove his exposure to those subjects.

Harryd225

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118596839#Comment_118596839

Well GTA is different. At the end of the day though it depends on how mature your son is and if he can handle the responsibility of playing an adult video game. My advice would be to let him play whatever he wants and put limits on his gaming time, but that's just me, personally I don't think parents should put restrictions on what movies teenagers watch or what games they can play.

Mr. CooL ICE

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118596451#Comment_118596451

Not necessarily true. The front page of YouTube has suggestions based on your prior viewing history. The only way Lisha's son would have violent movie scenes on the front page would be if he has already been watching violent movie scenes, or something similar.

Lisha

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118596964#Comment_118596964

On the lazy parenting, I know what you mean but I’m a very active parent to be honest.. I’ve always been very open with him and I’m now having conversations with him that I never taught possible. I’ve told him that I don’t think it’s good for anyone not to mind a child to get extra points in a game for killing a prostitute rather than pay for services. That to me is wrong. He knows exactly why I’m against GTA.

I get that he will feel left out and it’s especially sickening when friends of his aged 11-12 are playing gta but I’d prefer to get him a bit older.

o1s1n

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118596964#Comment_118596964

I suppose by letting your child play GTA, you are condoning them playing it. At least if they're doing it in a friends house you're not giving it the thumbs up.

If Lisha walks into the room and her son is watching the scene in GTA where Trevor doing all kinds of things with a prostitute, what's the protocol? Does Lisha give her son the thumbs up and walk out of the room? Look horrified and sit down for 'a talk'? It's all very awkward and weird and I honestly don't know how I'd handle the situation myself!

Augme

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118599791#Comment_118599791

Obviously the easit option is to just ban the game so you can avoid a situation like the above happening but that also kinda reinforces my point about lazy parenting. "I'll just ban it to avoid an awkward conversation".

Having awkward conversations with your child is an essential part of being a good parent. Mich healthier to have an attitude of embracing those awkward conversations rather than avoiding them.

OldSkull

Have a try to play a funny games other than war gaming....have sneak peak for the link below

Flinty997

Two schools of thought on this. Just let the kids do what they want and don't filter it.

Actually filter what they consume.

I'm in the I middle filter stuff after checking out what it is.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118601648#Comment_118601648

I suspect those that don't have any bans dont have any conversations.

alizabeth

Fun game, just understand it is violent. If you are only going to play gta online, the nudity is completely optional. Keep in mind that it still has quite a bit of violence, but if they play games like CoD, Watch Dogs, or even watch superhero movies they should be fine.