Possible slander

Thank you to the posters who took the time to post helpful and relevent advice.

Akrasia

OP

If the person who you believe may at some point begin to spread malicious and untrue rumours about you is in a mentally frail state, then this could be a symptom that their condition is not under control so I would speak as a concerned family member to their carer, or whoever is responsible for their treatment

Mental illness, especially where paranoia is involved is insidious and the person may believe that the allegations she is making against you are true even if there is absolutely no basis in reality for those allegations.

If this person has been diagnosed with a mental illness where she has paranoid delusions, then any allegations she makes against you would most likely not be believed

homer911

I'd suggest that a registered letter from a solicitor threatening legal proceedings in the event the claims are repeated or communicated to others would be the way to go - Enough to show you are serious and hopefully bringing it to an end

AndrewJRenko

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118828253#Comment_118828253

Why would I or anyone give you further advice when your immediate response is to tell everyone else why they’re wrong?

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118828518#Comment_118828518

No, just you. Your "advice" was for me to tell the man not to go to the police because the lady had already been there and made a complaint about historic sex abuse against him.

Would be sound advice in a completely different scenario with completely different people.

AndrewJRenko

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118828541#Comment_118828541

You forgot the “without taking legal advice first “ bit.

ShamanRing

OP for the love of god, talk to a solicitor. Going in guns blazing with a ‘preemptive’ denial will (correctly) set off alarm bells. Deal with this professionally.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118828550#Comment_118828550

Dude you have to move on!

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118828578#Comment_118828578

If I went in and told the police that I had run someone over in my car and killed them, they would want the body and the car. If I didn't own a car and there was no body, then they'd just tell me to get out. I don't know why people are finding it hard to comprehend, without any kids, there's simply no case.

"Guns blazing" wtf?

AndrewJRenko

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118828613#Comment_118828613

Maybe you should take your own advice.

spaceHopper

@bydgese, learn to use the add to ignore list feature of the site.

From what you are say you have a family member who is about to accuse you of being a child molester but not of actually molesting them. They are mentally ill.

I would get legal advice from solicitor, I would have prepared statement ready to give to any guards that show up. But I would not go to the guards, they would be obliged to investigate you and then you will “have been investigated” but insufficient evidence found.  Do you really want that.

Trying to engage with the relative is also going to cause you more harm than good, it will probably re enforce their delusions. The axiom “if you are explaining you are losing”.

You are in bind where the only thing you can do is get legal advice and be ready for what might come and hope it doesn’t. If you can avoid this person that’s probably the best thing to do. 

ShamanRing

Do what you want, you’ve come for advice and ignored everyone. All the best

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118828623#Comment_118828623

I dunno OP, you seem to think the accusations could be credible to someone who heard them. That suggests you either think the accuser would come across as credible or the accusations could sound true to someone who heard them.

I certainly wouldn't be rushing to the Gardai in the absence of any allegations being made to a third party (which of course, you might never hear about, as the third party is unlikely to come to you going "jaysis Budgese, you wouldn't believe what I'm after hearing, they're only gone and saying your a wrong 'un, up to all sorts with the chislers" etc).

It's a difficult situation but I think you need to explain more about why this person would make these allegations in the first place? What caused your relationship to deteriorate to this extent? Are they actually unwell etc?

Maybe a strongly worded solicitors letter would help but ime, if you are dealing with an irrational person you can't always expect rational actions will work. It might be a case of cutting your ties and moving on with your life.