Fell out with fellow housemates, need advice.

Stalk

I like the way you think but I've already tried dismantling the Spanish inquisition.

About a month ago, A had her fella over on a week night and talked loudly in her room till 3am. C knocked on the wall to tell A to shut up. (C has to wear ear plugs to sleep as her room is next to A's room)

A, being the narcissistic **** she is, thought this was out of order and told me she wanted to kick C and B out, after they'd been living here like 2 or 3 months. She said she would call the gaurds the next time C knocked on her wall.

I mentioned all this in the group chat recently. To no avail. They are strong in their collective hatred of me.

Anyway, I know what A is like, very fake and two faced, self serving and snake like.

I've seen the way people in this gaff work. They are idiots. A used to be the bad guy and we all bonded over that. Now I am the bad guy and they are all bonding over that.

it's obviously scapegoating behaviour. It happens often in toxic families and toxic groups.

Groups that need a common enemy in order to function are not healthy.

As for complaint to the letting agent, I did today and they emailed back basically saying: "You recruited all these people, we aren't social workers".

Stalk

Regarding meter readings and all that jazz, we don't have a gas account anymore. I'll be gone from here before winter, sweet baby jesus willing.

Jequ0n

“it's obviously scapegoating behaviour. It happens often in toxic families and toxic groups. 

Groups that need a common enemy in order to function are not healthy.”

The most toxic person in this group seems to be you with this unbearable victim role that you have assigned yourself…

Feenix

Genuine question; have you tried to ride any of them?

JeffKenna

In fairness OP you did recruit all of these people into the house so you need to have a look at your selection process. Bringing people into a house based on their looks is not the way to go.

Stalk

Ok here's an update for anyone still invested.

A's boyfriend screamed in my face yesterday when I went down to get my pizza out of the oven. I told him to get out multiple times, a fight was very close to happening. I called the gardai. I also didn't feel safe in the house so I left and went to a friends house.

I got a call 3 hours later from the switchboard telling me the gaurds are outside my house. Apparently all my housemates made statements, probably all the same.

Now the letting agent is trying to organise a meeting between the housemates which I think is pointless, after all, 3 against one.

Now I don't feel safe in my house at all and my letting agent won't throw A out even though antisocial behaviour from a guest is definitely a reason to evict someone.

If anyone feels like giving me some legal advice I'd appreciate it. I'm going to the G station to make a statement today. I might call a solicitor.

Seth Brundle

^^^ FFS - just move out and don't waste your time following up with a solicitor!

Stalk

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119336349#Comment_119336349

Great idea, where to though?

Seth Brundle

To be blunt, not my problem! However, based on what you're telling us, the relationship in your current accommodation has deteriorated to the extent that you're involving the gardai because you felt intimidated and "didn't feel safe in the house". Your three housemates also called the gardai on you, something which your landlord became involved in.

Why would you stay in that environment?

Jump_In_Jack

@Stalk

Why did the bf of A shout in your face? Was he drunk?

Or did you do something like bump into him or say something that he took as a provocation?

If he just threatened you without cause then you should go to that mediation meeting and see if you can speak up for yourself.

If I were you I would stop collecting the rent for the landlord, pay your own share and tell the others to pay the landlord their own share themselves.

If ye are all named on the lease then ye are all equal so nobody should have to act as the rent collector for the landlord.

sw59td

Somehow i dont think the housemates are the only ones to blame…

spaceHopper

@Stalk "You recruited all these people, we aren't social workers"

I warned you that would do no good. Calling the Guards wasn't the smartest thing to do, then not hanging around made it worse, they got their side in first and had time to agree a story. Who informed the letting agent? You've literally hung yourself out to dry here.

This is what I see happening,

(1)LL will evict all of you for antisocial behavior.

(2)LL will evict you for for antisocial behavior. A will move in their BF and they will replace you getting a reduction in rent

(3)Get your own place or a new house share.

(4)You stick it out and eventually do 3.

road_high

The drama in this thread exhausts me even reading and thinking about it

Jump_In_Jack

Any update @Stalk

brokenangel

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119336285#Comment_119336285

Move out is the legal advice

SuperS54

Definitely take a close look at the situation with the cancelled gas. If you were getting estimated bills and that caused it to be higher than it should have been, that situation would have been resolved when the gas was cancelled and a final meter reading taken, someone may have gotten a nice refund bonus for themselves.

Sympathies on living with the Latinos all the same, lived with one for a summer and she drove me nuts, even getting the regular leg over didn't make up for the stress...

RabbleRouser2k

OP, I lived in a similar situation to you. Tho without the aggressive BF's.

When I moved in, room mates were two guys. After two years (they'd been there for about 3 years before I moved in), one got engaged to his GF. Then a year later, the other one's partner moved over for a new job. And they decided to find a place together.

Fast forward, two new room mates moved in. Both women. I'd lived with women before, so I was used to them. The tidyness that had been there all along... evaporated. I try and keep everything clean. I'm not perfect, but I wash up after myself. Hoover the place and so on. One of them would turn off the heating at the weekends, when they'd both go away with friends or to see family. Only found this out once while I was home alone. A cost saving measure, but one I was never consulted on (I always turned it back on). There were other issues that grated on my nerves. I was the one who put out the bins every week (this seems unimportant, but it'll be relevant later). They never put them out. They did pay the waste collection fees tho. So no argument's over bills.

When my lease was up, I moved out. Fast forward 4 months, I get a strange message from my (now) former landlord. Telling me that the garbage hasn't been put out in 4 months (literally the last time it was put out, I did it). The two ladies had a falling out, and one of them is gone, and he's moved in two male renters. Don't know why the hell he called me-wasn't like I was going down there to throw out the garbage. He should have just given them a strike, and told them to take out the trash.

It's gonna be rough. But you'll need to find a place. Also, no matter what you're smoking, I can't see landlord's too keen on a smoker tenant. Non-smokers tend to be the preferred option, notably for fire safety. (Accidentally falling asleep with a lit cigarette, as a possible insurance liability). If you move out, and the landlord finds he's been left with nightmare tenants... then maybe he'll give you a decent reference in the future.

Donald Trump

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119295518#Comment_119295518

I knew a fella that went down that road too. Tom was his name. Tom thought the casual drug use was harmless but then even he realised that he couldn't stop. Ever since then, it has only further descended into a worse state of affairs. I heard from a fella last week that it had gotten so bad that Tom even turns up a few minutes late for Mass on some Sundays. Scandal in the parish

Pussyhands

Oh man, OP got duped. lol

3 latina's who were all on their best behaviour fluttering their eye lashes probably wearing belly tops and tight pants. He thought he'd be living the dream with all these women and all their friends over having a great time.

3 women is too many. Not least because they're pretty much useless for any manly things like things breaking down. Now men can be useless but a good portion of men have an idea of things or are willing to get stuck in.

dybbuk

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119357198#Comment_119357198

On a different forum I've made an observation about the Irish that was incomparably much less offensive than the above comment. Yet I was chastised for making a "sweeping statement". Is this inconsistency an oversight or is this website openely nationalistic and xenophobic?

Hotblack Desiato

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119357316#Comment_119357316

I think being willing to get stuck in was the problem here

paulieeye

ok, not buying the last update, sounds like a load a bollix to me

Stalk

Alrighty folks, Here is the new update. The incident with the BF happened when I was trying to get a pizza out of the oven, he had started cooking a steak with A. He wouldn't move out of the way of the oven, so I asked him to. This immediately kicked things off with A shouting at me and then the BF screaming unintelligible, drunken, broken English at me. I abandoned the pizza and went up to my room to call the guards.

I opened the door to see if the guards were outside, he was roaming around the hallway, looking like he was about to smash me up. I asked him to get out and pointed outside, he said, no you.

I left the house for a few hours because I was afraid of getting bashed, got a call 3 hours later that the guards were outside. Apparently all the housemates made a statement. But when I went to the guarda station the next day, they said no one made statements and no one answered the door.

After the "Round table meeting" hosted by the director of my letting agency, a decision was made to 1. Install locks on all the "females" bedroom doors in the house, in order to make them feel safe.

Because I wasn't at the meeting I get no lock on my door. But also I didn't have to listen to them ganging up on about me for an hour.

2.A warning notice has been issued by the letting agent, saying that, within the next 4 weeks if there is 1 more incident of antisocial behaviour, all tenants will be served a notice of eviction. This was the decision of the landlord who probably doesn't want any hassle what so ever and just wants his free money.

I assume antisocial behaviour means, BF shouting at me or assaulting me, then me calling the guards, filing another report and telling the letting agency. Although it actually means anyone in the house reporting antisocial behaviour from anyone else.

Eviction now seems inevitable, as the other day the BF followed me down to the shops. The guy is a total hot head whos been hiding it for months. This is why I didn't want him to move in, although if when asked by A, I had of allowed him to move in, I'd have been able to get a safety order.

That's where I'm at now. Not sure if it's good or bad. I don't even know if the Spanish girls know that the warning notice applies to all of us.

Seth Brundle

To quote what I previously asked you: Why would you stay in that environment?

Seriously, you risk being evicted and getting no reference if there is anything else. Just get out while you can and let them fight amongst themselves!

Caranica

There was a round table meeting and you didn't bother your a*se going?? You deserve all that's coming if that's your attitude.

rolling boh

This situation is nuts and getting more nutty by the day .

Stalk

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119360751#Comment_119360751

Not sure if you're aware of this but getting even a room in a house share is next to impossible right now. Went to a viewing the other day and the guy said to me that he had 600 responses to the ad for 1 room in a 3 bed shared apartment.

It's really tough right now.

Stalk

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119360920#Comment_119360920

Love the support thanks a lot, others could learn a lot from your compassion and empathy!

Stalk

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119361228#Comment_119361228

I'm in a tropical storm and I'm not enjoying it.

Seth Brundle

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119361283#Comment_119361283

You could be evicted soon and it will be a lot harder then!