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Pre-Marriage Course

  • 16-08-2022 11:38pm
    #1
    youngblood
    Registered Users Posts: 1,770 ✭✭✭


    Anyone recommend a pre marriage course for same sex couple?

    Lots of friends found elements of theirs useful and would like to see if there's anything similar



Comments

  • #2
    Annasopra
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,096 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    Are they not usually courses run by religious organisations for heterosexual couples?

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • #3
    youngblood
    Registered Users Posts: 1,770 ✭✭✭youngblood


    Yea they usually are but presumed there would also be non religious ones?

    Surely its a good idea to go through some basic work like this commiting to a lifetime together?



  • #4
    L1011
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 69,413 ✭✭✭✭L1011


    I don't think there are any secular hetero pre-marriage courses let alone ones that cover same sex relationships. They are religious indoctrination routines, not preparation to live together - even if that's what they pretend to be.



  • #5
    Pissy Missy
    Registered Users Posts: 1,860 ✭✭✭Pissy Missy


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058259139/pre-marriage-course
    https://www.irishexaminer.com/lifestyle/arid-20388699.html

    There's information near the bottom of the article where you can do a 3 hour course



  • #6
    AllForIt
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,474 ✭✭✭AllForIt


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058259139/pre-marriage-course

    Why would they be any different from heterosexual 'courses'?

    And what is it your expecting to get out of it?



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  • #7
    youngblood
    Registered Users Posts: 1,770 ✭✭✭youngblood


    Same expectations as a heterosexual couple I suppose



  • #8
    youngblood
    Registered Users Posts: 1,770 ✭✭✭youngblood


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119499352#Comment_119499352

    Thanks a million for that

    It was them who had been recommended to us before but they went into liquidation in 2017

    It's a pity more don't exist as I feel a few counselling sessions with a couple when things are going well could prevent having to attend one when things aren't!



  • #9
    Pissy Missy
    Registered Users Posts: 1,860 ✭✭✭Pissy Missy


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119513352#Comment_119513352

    Sorry to hear that. Do you think it would be helpful to go see a relationship counsellor?



  • #10
    youngblood
    Registered Users Posts: 1,770 ✭✭✭youngblood


    I literally presumed everyone went to see a counsellor before getting married!

    Straight or gay!

    Presume it would be good to consider scenarios maybe we haven't thought about/discussed with a 3rd party?



  • #11
    Pissy Missy
    Registered Users Posts: 1,860 ✭✭✭Pissy Missy


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119513430#Comment_119513430

    Idk, my gay friend hasn't and they've done fine without one



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  • #12
    Annasopra
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,096 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119513430#Comment_119513430

    It really is mostly a religious thing because its a religious requirement. I know of couples who thought they were a waste of time but they went just so they could marry in a catholic church.

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • #13
    kippy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,738 ✭✭✭✭kippy


    It's religious but it's an interesting thing to bring up. Not everything religious is bad. Some stuff is grounded in sense.

    Having attended one such course back in the day, very little religion or religious angles were actually discussed.

    Topics were mostly around shared finances, responsibilities, living together, illness and how to handle the committment you were making, dealing with conflict. There was nothing too ground breaking for us as a couple has we had lived together for some time and knew each other well. There were however younger couples that definetly needed their eyes opened on what they were getting into.

    I do think it's a good idea to have a facilitator go through all of these angles before making the committment. I suppose one of the big takeaways for us was what would happen and how would we handle serious illness within the couple etc. Hard to explain and possibly not something that bothers everyone but was good to have a chance to talk it out.

    Best of luck finding something that suits yerselves and fair play for the foresight.



  • #14
    L1011
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 69,413 ✭✭✭✭L1011


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119513430#Comment_119513430

    I don't know anyone who has done one, except for the solitary RC marriage I've been to. And I've been to a lot of Humanist / HSE weddings.



  • #15
    youngblood
    Registered Users Posts: 1,770 ✭✭✭youngblood


    Cheers for that, I'm just thinking ahead and the positives associated with spending a few hours with qualifed specialist while planning a life together. Preemptive more than anything else!

    Hopefully there might be something suitable.

    Cheers everyone



  • #16
    Annasopra
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,096 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    There is another company mentioned here


    https://www.image.ie/editorial/marriage-preparation-courses-know-one-right-113408

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • #17
    Annasopra
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,096 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    Another one here


    https://www.accesscounselling.ie/counselling-courses/pre-marriage-course-dublin/

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



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