Identical twins

maybebabybaby

I already have kids but we decided we'd go for one last baby. Had a scan in the EPU today because of a previous pregnancy loss and much to my surprise they spotted what they suspect are identical twins. It's not 100% because it's so early (6 weeks) and I have to get another scan in a week to confirm but the picture they sent me home with clearly shows two little yolk sacs. I am feeling all the feelings - delighted and excited of course, but also terrified and worried. I have so many questions: can we manage two babies?! Will I have complications? Can we afford twins? Will I have time for my other kids? Do we need to buy a bigger house?? etc. etc.

I would love to hear from twin parents. Especially anybody who had monochorionic twins (shared placenta). It seems like the rate of complications during pregnancy and even afterwards is very high. Would love to hear other people's experience. Thanks!

fits

Ohh wow. I remember hearing that news and it’s something else. I couldn’t even talk for a day. Mine weren’t identical so I can’t help you there but I did learn after a while to take each day as it comes and really listen to your body and rest if you need to.

congratulations. 😀

niallb

Congratulations! Ours are 19 now and just moved out. I'm missing them terribly. :-(

Like yourself we had lost an earlier pregnancy by placental abruption at 28 weeks so had a few extra scans and attention because of increased risk. You can't help but be a little scared, so take all the help that's on offer. It is a bit like trying to look after a baby while exhausted from looking after a baby and that's just because it is. Your older kids could be what makes this easier for you if they get involved. Our son was three when the girls were born and got really good at bringing down nappies and changing bags or bottles of water or whatever was needed. He felt really involved and I think that helped avoid any idea of not having time for him. Twins in a family can make it really hard to have individual time for anybody. There's a "Fairness Police" that must be obeyed.

Before letting us go home from the hospital, the staff took our twins into a room with a sheet of paper to write down all the differences between them head to toe. In our case they had them there for half an hour and then came back to us with a blank sheet of paper and said "I think we're going to leave the tags on". When they outgrew those tags we painted their toenails different colours for a few months. Just to be sure we didn't feed one twice and one not at all. It was always fairly easy to tell them apart when they were awake, but once they dozed off it was anybody's guess.

shesty

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119707007#Comment_119707007

I just popped in, but this response made me smile.☺️how lovely.

maybebabybaby

Thanks, folks! I've gotten used to the idea a bit by now. It's so hard not to tell anyone when it is on my mind all the time but we decided we'd keep it to ourselves until the scan next week at least. And I have to keep reminding myself that it's not confirmed yet. I hate the not knowing. The next scan cannot come fast enough for me now!

fits

I was so anxious at the start too. Had weekly scans. It’s a tough time. I had to tell close family as I was finding it all a lot to deal with.

maybebabybaby

Well, I had another scan and it's confirmed. Identical twins. Two heartbeats and measuring on dates. The consultant was rushed off her feet but did take a moment to convey to us just how high-risk this pregnancy is. We have just over a 4 in 5 chance of two living babies - and that's not even getting into the risks of serious health/developmental problems after birth.

I don't know how I feel about it all. Was in tears more than once after the scan. I think I would have been both disappointed and relieved if they'd only found one. But my partner is a die-hard optimist and he's delighted, so at least one of us is feeling very positive about it all. I think I'll lay off googling survival rates and outcomes for monochorionic twins - there's really no point because from what I can tell none of the problems are preventable. Will stick to more enjoyable diversions like googling pictures of cute baby twins and thinking about double buggies :)

Congratulations!

I know its pointless telling you not to worry - but try not to worry!

Take care of yourself and have fun picking two names! 🤰

fits

I suffered with terrible anxiety at the start of my pregnancy - absolutely convinced I’d lose the pregnancy which was completely unexpected and against the odds in the first place. It was a rollercoaster few months. The anxiety combined with awful morning sickness was really horrible. When the scan showed twins I was like ah here. You can worry and worry and then be blindsided by something out of the blue.

I did a gentlebirth course and found the meditations and approach really helped. And I didn’t get within an asses roar of a natural birth and didn’t expect to. We did get over 37 weeks though. I breastfed them exclusively too

Now, one of my twins is disabled. But it’s actually nothing to do with him being a twin. It’s an inherited condition. And we are doing ok. More than ok really.

You will be really well monitored and get the best care. Really do look after yourself though. I can’t stress enough how important that is. Listen to your body.

maybebabybaby

I'm so glad to hear that you and your twins are doing well.

And it gives me hope to hear that you made it to 37 weeks and breastfed them both. I really loved breastfeeding my others.

fits

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119801328#Comment_119801328

There’s no question that it was challenging and it is likely that yours will arrive sooner. But I do know of mono/mono twins that had TTTS - had the surgery and were breastfed. They are doing really well. They very much encourage expressing for preemies to begin with anyway. There’s two fantastic Facebook groups for feeding multiples. One Irish and one uk based. They were absolutely invaluable to me. The UK one is moderated by a lactation consultant who had twins. It’s brilliant.