Worried Sick - Speech Delay

Shhk11

Hi all,

My son turns 20 months old next week and I'm honestly sick with worry about his speech. He only has a few words and some days I might not even hear one of those. He smiles, laughs, and has good eye contact. He has excellent motor skills. 

My concern mainly surrounds his understanding. If I call his name, he doesn't always respond. He won't go get his shoes if I ask him, and doesn't seem to understand basic instructions. My partner pointed at something tonight and he didn't follow his point. We booked a private hearing test in the Beacon which is the end of the month in case it's his hearing but he can hear Cocomelon from the other room!! 

I made the mistake of googling the symptoms of Autism and now I'm worried. He doesn't flap his hand or walk on his tip toes, but he LOVES cars (plays with them appropriately. Sometimes he gets on the floor and looks at things at eye level which apparently is another symptom!!

He has replaced pointing with hand leading (this apparently is another symptom as well). 

I am trying to get him booked in with Speech and Language therapy privately as the waiting list is too long with the HSE. So far none of the places have called me back as they are booked out.

I'm really worried and would just like to hear others' opinions/advice on this.

Thanks so much

Loveinapril

Have a look at an Assessment of Need form. It's a parent referral form and your child would be assessed by a variety of disciplines (including speech and language, psychology and occupational therapy). The waiting list is close to two years so no harm in getting the referral in now. Speech and language therapy is unlikely to help at his age, he is still really young. Boys often have delayed speech too.

shesty

Ehhh....20 months is really young being honest.Does he babble at all?? SLT are unlikely to do an assessment at his age.Also what do you mean by basic instructions?

If you have concerns I would talk to the PHN first.Before jumping for the assessment forms.I always thought with mine it was around 22 mths before real speech started coming through, and mine all had very good speech when young.I know you are seeing other things, but again age is a big factor here, so I think a chat with the PHN first would be worth it.

Jim_Hodge

They're all different. We've had kids with full sentences at 20 months and others with only occasional words at 24 months. They all went on to be perfectly fine .

Shhk11

Hi, thanks so much for your reply. By simple commands I mean if I say "Get your shoes" he doesn't understand. According to all articles I've read, they should understand simple instructions from 18 months so I do worry.

Over the past few days he has said a couple of new words but has only said them once and not again.

Shhk11

Thanks so much for your reply. I'll just try relax a little!!

Shhk11

Thanks for your reply. I'll give it another few months and see how he does.

JDD

Shhk11 - 20 months is very young, and many of the things that a psychologist would assess a child for in an autism assessment are just things that exist naturally in toddlers i.e. difficultly transitioning from one thing to the next, wanting the same story over and over, wanting the same plate or fork, no appreciation of danger etc.

In my experience, the big explosion of words happens any time between 18 and 24 months. Even if it doesn't happen by the age of two, for many children speech therapy alone is all that is needed to get them to catch up.

I will say this though. My 5 year old son is autistic. Nobody wants their child to get that diagnosis, and although I saw red flags and in my heart of hearts I knew something was amiss, I clung to the symptoms he did not have. He did not flap his hands or walk on his tiptoes at age 2 or 3 - but started to at age 4 (after we got a diagnosis). He did, and still does, have very good eye contact. He isn't overly bothered by loud noises. But he had a speech delay right from the start, and like you I could see that he didn't understand instructions. Not that he understood, but didn't want to do it. Just like I was speaking a different language entirely.

Now, something to provide more comfort. An autism diagnosis (at least on the milder end of the scale) isn't the awful thing I thought it was going to be. Once we started to amend the way that we parented, and got him speech therapy and approval for an SNA in school, he is like a different child. Yes, of course there is extra expense, and you have to fight for everything, and it's not easy on siblings. But my biggest regret is not getting him diagnosed earlier - there is so much more we could have done to help him.

So what am I saying really? I suppose I'm saying its very early to worry, and more than likely he will just catch up, even if he needs a little intervention to help. But, trust your gut and realise that every autistic child is different - what bothers one will not bother another - so don't rely on online lists of symptoms. Perhaps fill out the Assessment of Need form now - he'll be put on the waiting list for assessment and it'll probably be the full year before he gets an appointment. If you don't need it by then, you can cancel. Don't be put off by well meaning relatives or your partner. We always act like something like this will never happen to us. But your job isn't to bury your head in the sand, it's to get him whatever help he needs when he needs it. And also, take my own advice with a pinch of salt. I see autism everywhere now - it's like buying a red car and then suddenly noticing red cars everywhere - even where it's likely it doesn't exist!

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120315852#Comment_120315852

You could go for a hearing test. You'll have to go privately though as the waiting lists are long.

My son was similar. Got a lot of ear infections. The problem was identified and he was referred onwards. Can't shut him up now 🤣

GeekyRedhead

As someone else mention, does he babble and make the stereotypical baby sounds?

My 10year old daughter has a severe speech delay, and now that I've also had a second child, I can see how she was actually delayed with sounds from the very start - I just didn't realize cause I had 0 experience with children. I thought the gaga googoo sounds were like cartoon stereotypes until I got my second and realized "Oh wow, they DO make these sounds!" She doesn't have an autism diagnosis (Tho of course it was thrown around a lot when she was younger, but she tested out of that), so it keeps "just" being noted as a expressive speech delay.

I'd say trust your gut, if you feel like he's alright then try to relax and let some time pass and see how it goes. If you feel like something isn't going quite as it should, it's at least worth a chat with the doctors about potential evaluations. There are some simple evaluations they can do even at such a young age to gage where they're at :)

Shhk11

Thanks so much for your reply. He does babble a lot but not gaagaa. He says mmm sounds duu sounds ahhh, ouuu, owww, etc and yaps away.

What I find unusual is he will say something like "Door" and hasn't said it again yet!!!

He is waving, clapping, pointing.

I'm worried that he can't follow my instructions when I say "Get your shoes", or "Put that in the bin" as apparently this is a delay in receptive language.

I'm just non stop worrying tbh!! I have a private hearing test booked in the Beacon for the end of the month. Ice tried to book in speech therapy (privately) and they either don't get back to me, or tell me they are booked up. So I suppose its a waiting game.

Kintarō Hattori

Just to comment that my soon to be six year old didn't speak until she was three. Now she's non-stop. When she was small my partner had all sorts of concerns and she was booked into speech and therapy, occupational therapy and just about everything else. As mentioned it's no harm in filling out the assessment of needs form as the waiting list is long.

She took her time with things and has some minor sensory issues (loves textures and pressure). Now she never stops talking.

Do follow-up any concerns you may have, but don't jump in at the deep end.

Bicyclette

Autism is a continuum. Its not a black and white diagnosis. There is a saying "once you've met one person with autism, you've met one person with autism". Don't panic if you think your child has it. It is NOT the end of the world. There are a lot of adults out there, who have autism diagnoses, or who may have characteristics of autism, and they are doing fine.

My adult son has autism. Conversely, he didn't stop talking as a child. It was constant. So much so that his elder sisters used to have competitions to see how long he could stay quiet for - longest, if I recall correctly was 15 seconds.

On the other hand one of my daughters was diagnosed with "selective deafness". Basically she responded to what she wanted to respond to. "I have sweets" - brilliant. She could hear you. "Please tidy your room" - nope. She wasn't hearing that.

Speak to your PHN. Speak to your GP. Work with your child. Communication doesn't always have to be verbal. You can use other ways too. And try and stop worrying. Your child will be able to pick up on your worry, which may exacerbate things. Take things on a day to day basis.