Girls, I need your help!

Bazookatone

Ok
Any of you who know me say I'm fast talking, quite insane, (apparently) unbelievebly horny sex maniac with the tact and charm of a cactus. Any of you who don't, see above.

Anyway, I've met this girl whose absolutely fantastic. She's drop dead gordeous, funny, and has a laugh that turns my legs to mush. She could stop a 200 tonne freight train in it's tracks with her smile. (you know that bit in "Love Actually", where Keira Knightly walks into the church for the first time, that's pretty much how I see her all the time).

To the point, I've just worked up the courage to talk to her, and I don't want to give her the impression that I'm a fast talking, quite insane, (apparently) unbelievebly horny sex maniac with the tact and charm of a cactus. Basically, I need to alter my personality completely.

Now, I'm doing a lot of the things right. I'm always clean as a whistle, nails trimmed, hair cut, bit of designer stubble, just one small stud in my ear, clothes neat, colour co-ordinated, presentable etc. When I'm around her, I'm always chewing gum so my breath is fresh. And I've gone on an intense toning up session. During the summer, I sort of fell out of the habit of excercising, but I'm back at it, and I'm doing Martial arts 4 times a week, so I'm in tip top shape.

Unforyunately, my natural appearance is counting against me. I'm on the short side, I've got red har, and an unusually slender neck (one might say "gangly") I'm a slight build, so even though I'm very strong (and I am, I can do 12 chin ups at a time and I've done Hiundu squats with a person bigger than me on my back) I don't have big bulging muscles.

Also, when I'm nervous, I have a nasty habit of saying something really strange (like Chandler in "Firends"). But I'm working on that. I'm trying to come across as a responsible mellow sort of guy, the sort of person people respect because he sees all sides of an argument. Basically, I'm ripping off Oisín's whole "peacemaker " thing.

So my question is, what else can I do to make myself appealing, and what do girls actually look for in a bloke, and be honest, don't all say "oh personality is sooooo important" because, that's just not true is it.

Hugh Hefner

Okay, first thing's first, change your avatar. It's terrible.
Next, spread a rumour about an oversized appendage.
3rd, learn what she likes and work it into conversations. Say you're looking forward to the next _________.
4th, a quick brush off her feet. Romantic, spontanious, whirlwnd desire should overcome her.
5th, this is crap. You shouldn't feel you have to change yourself for her. If she doesn't like the normal you then maybe she's not worth it (keeping in mind she's still really hot). I know it sounds cliched but it's true.

You could for course put yourslef on the line and just ask her out. She might say no but at least you can stop this insane show. It's win-win, except that you could lose.

Well, good luck.

P.S. A good bit of confidence doesn't hurt.

ARGINITE

P.S. A good bit of confidence doesn't hurt.

a good balance of confidence and humility, also you shouldnt have to change if she doesnt like you the way you are well than it was never ment to be, even if she is hot.

also do this!

3rd, learn what she likes and work it into conversations. Say you're looking forward to the next _________.

StupidLikeAFox

Bazookatone wrote:

I need to alter my personality completely.

Dont come across as a phony either though

It wasn't me!

To hell with it. Nobody's worth changing for. Don't compromise yourself. If they don't like you as you are then why bother? They're not right for you.

Matthewthebig

I agree with Dave. You are you. You are not mr amazing. No one is. If she doesn't like you then thats her loss. I'm annoying as hell but i have a girlfriend who accepts that. Someone will accept the way you are. it may be here. So go up to her talk to her and finally...BE YOURSELF!

edibility

Get stoned, and send her a text message saying you want to go down on her.


It actually works.

Well. For some people.

*adele*

well the first thing you have to do is keep true to yourself because if you dont she'll like the fake you and you cant be him all the time if she doesnt like you for you she's not worth it.If that sounds stupid i'm sorry,u sound cool and if she cant like you for that then dont bother

Bob_Hoskins

Bazookatone wrote:

Basically, I need to alter my personality completely.

Dont alter you personality just to suit one girl, its not worth it as you can only ever be yourself and eventually you will be exhausted with having to constantly put on a facade. You never know, she might like you as you are !This is assuming you want a relationship.

If you dont, walk up to her and whisper in her ear all of the ****ed up things youd like to do to her. She might like it, she might not. Whats the worst that can happen

Fusion251

Don't be a phonie, or you'll have this lad after ya...




Don't bost about martial arts and your fitness.
Don't lie and be confident but not cocky.

Oh yeah...and listen to her if she's talking to you.

Plastic Scouser

Bazookatone wrote:

I'm always clean as a whistle, nails trimmed, hair cut, bit of designer stubble, just one small stud in my ear, clothes neat, colour co-ordinated, presentable etc..

If you take out the stud in your ear you might stand a better chance! I hate guys wearing earrings!


(Could be just me though I guess! )

Aoibheann

I think that you don't need help from us girls, the guys are giving you some great advice. Do what they say and it'll be fine.

To reiterate what they said: dont change yourself to impress someone else.

GlitterB

Bazookatone wrote:

Ok

Also, when I'm nervous, I have a nasty habit of saying something really strange (like Chandler in "Firends"). But I'm working on that. I'm trying to come across as a responsible mellow sort of guy, the sort of person people respect because he sees all sides of an argument. Basically, I'm ripping off Oisín's whole "peacemaker " thing.

.

Stop making SUCH an effort there is no point in making all these changes because if ya do get with her then sooner or later its gonna come out that the person she fell for wasnt you...you'd feel far better about urself if ya knew she fell for the real you.....Dont try and be all reasonable and stuff girls are not gonna fall for tht if its not you and she mite up seeing ya as more of a friend be a bit more...em passionate/fiery whatever!!??as for the Chandler thing ya are doin if doesnt like ya with all ur good AND bad points she isnt really that special at all

mentalimplosion

Bob_Hoskins wrote:

If you dont, walk up to her and whisper in her ear all of the ****ed up things youd like to do to her. She might like it, she might not. Whats the worst that can happen

she could press charges.

*adele*

well.....can u tell us who she is?dont worry if you cant!

TalkISCheap

if she presses charges say u were stoned while whispering in her ear. better yet, actually be stoned while whispering in her ear, and get a friend to videotape it all as proof.

why are u all looking at me?... :eek: what do you mean do i have experience of this sort of thing?!?

freakydeadgirl

just be yourself... that's the best way to hook this girl
hey she might find your quirks, cute and appealing

Bazookatone

1) My avatar is fine
2) I misled you when I made the "changing personality", quip. I meant more, I need to keep the eccentrivities to a minimum.
3) She doesn't dislike my present personality, because I haven't let it run amok in her presence. But it does have a nasty habit of alienating attractive girls.
4) When I mentioned the martial arts and fitness thing, I didn't mean it as a boast. I was just giving all my pros and cons so that you guys could make informed comments.
5) "Don't change youself, it's not worth it" is not particularly constructive, please be specific. thanks anyway though, I know you meant well.
6) "Get drunk and tell her you want to go down on her" is constructive. It's really bad advice but at least it's specific. That's the sort of advice I'm looking for. Thanks. (Ps There's not a snowball's chance in Hell that I'll actually do that.)

7) Feakydeadgirl: NO-ONE finds my quirks cute or appealing

8) More advice please, this stuff's gold!

Bazookatone

PS
Fusion 251. Where the Hell did you get that picture of me!

adele. You don't know her, but just in case, by the 1 in a million chance she finds this site, figures out who I am and that I'm talking about her, thereby scaring her off, I'm not going to say her name.

And, one more thing, I've been being myself for 19 years, and it's not getting me any action. At this point, I am so Sex starved, I would gladly do an impression of a midget, one eyed, peg legged belly dancer in a vietnamese strip joint to get some. I am a shallow, terrible human being, judge me all you want, just kepp posting useful tips.

Crucifix

Bazookatone wrote:

I'm trying to come across as a responsible mellow sort of guy, the sort of person people respect because he sees all sides of an argument.

Be more specific about who you're trying to be. The above description sounds like me. I am, at best, medium popular with the women.
If you're going to go to the trouble of faking a personality, you should make sure you've picked the right personality. Do you know anything about her ex-boyfriends, i.e.: The type of guy she goes for? If not it's stalker time.....I'm joking, of course.
Well, good luck with that.

gigglingrat

Send her a Valentine's day card with your number inside. So what if it's not Valentines day? Sets you apart from the crowd, so it does.

jono087

I know it's not the way to win a girls heart, but if you want muscle the simple answer is hard work....... 50 pressups & situps a night, run at least 10k a week, and eat loads and loads of meat........ believe me it works!

Hugh Hefner

jono087 wrote:

and eat loads and loads of meat........

Yeah if you want to die at 40. LOL.

It wasn't me!

Don't eat too much, but eat a good bit of protein, lift weights and before you know it you'll have a figure like mine!

smiley_knees

If your trying to make her laugh do NOT under any circumstances joke about her, even if it is funny as hell and even if you'll know she'll be cool with it. It really is not cool. Grrr, personal experiences...

Ah, and um, I know it's easier to say than do but (well, I was told by guys anyways), um, try not to get too *happy* (wink wink nudge nudge). It's knida awkward. don't know if I'm the only one who feels this way, but hey.. There's only so many times you can joke about their having a gun in their pocket...

Bottle_of_Smoke

smiley_knees wrote:

If your trying to make her laugh do NOT under any circumstances joke about her, even if it is funny as hell and even if you'll know she'll be cool with it. It really is not cool. Grrr, personal experiences...

ha bang wrong, maybe you mean dont be horrible to her(which makes sense) but if you dont treat her like everyone else she'll feel isolated and awkward.

I say just be yourself, and the real yourself, not some "nice guy" type tosser

find something you like about yourself and think about it too much, that way you'll be confident and maybe even likeable

doonothing

OR just keep nagging and nagging at her til she eventually says yes.
(almost) never fails

Crash

distract her with an rte guide and schlip in the log.

MatthewVII

The trick is to not appear too eager and keep her on her toes. Every time you pass her, just say hi or something and walk on. Don't talk to her for more than a minute or two, say if you're both waiting on a bus, waiting to go into class, just generically waiting for something. Tell her something about yourself every time and gradually it'll build up. One of the most important things women like (in my experience) is someone who doesnt take themselves too seriously. Dont be afraid to laugh at your own mistakes, but dont make yourself look like a complete prat. in conclusion:
laugh, but not too hard
be interested in what she has to say, but dont appear to hang on every word
be friendly but not overly friendly
be funny but dont try to be a comedian

Girls dont like people who try too hard! just follow the above and she'll see you as more of an equal instead of a toy to be pushed around

Undergod

Are any of these people even from CTYI? Bazookatone, feel lucky, people the country over are advising you. One of them has got to be right.

StupidLikeAFox

MatthewVII wrote:

The trick is to not appear too eager and keep her on her toes. Every time you pass her, just say hi or something and walk on. Don't talk to her for more than a minute or two, say if you're both waiting on a bus, waiting to go into class, just generically waiting for something.

And as your waiting some other guy will slip in and take the bull by the horns (no offence to the girl in question) and BANG, end of your life