Girls, I need your help!

jono087

Christ, if you really really like her just wait 'til you see her drunk some night and use all your charm...... crude, dishonourable, nasty, but it just might work.... then in the morning convince her that she came onto you!



(btw, I don't seriously suggest you do that, 'cos it's not very nice)

mentalimplosion

jono087 wrote:

50 pressups & situps a night

ehh dunno about the pressups but you'll need a helluva lot more than 50 situps a night... start at 100 and work your way up to 300 a night... and press your tongue to the roof of your mouth, so as not to get a pot-belly

It wasn't me!

Weights are better than pressups for visible muscles but to be honest pressups make you physically stronger if you do them right. I would reccomend working your way up to doing a few hundred a day before starting any real upper body training. As for sit-ups, start at about two or three hundred. From the exercise you say you do it shouldn't be a lot of bother to you, and work your way up to a thousand in sets of a hundred. Make sure you just crunch them as well. Go any further and you're wasting your time. They'll do nothing. That's just physical advice. I still don't think it'll really do you any good. If all she sees is a physique it's a shallow attraction and not worth the air you're breathing.

JenLorigan

Bazookatone wrote:

At this point, I am so Sex starved, I would gladly do an impression of a midget, one eyed, peg legged belly dancer in a vietnamese strip joint to get some. I am a shallow, terrible human being, judge me all you want, just kepp posting useful tips.

That might get you somewhere. Especially if she's a CTYIer, or CTYIish.

pinkpimp

Hugh Hefner wrote:

Okay, first thing's first, change your avatar. It's terrible.
Next, spread a rumour about an oversized appendage.
3rd, learn what she likes and work it into conversations. Say you're looking forward to the next _________.
4th, a quick brush off her feet. Romantic, spontanious, whirlwnd desire should overcome her.
5th, this is crap. You shouldn't feel you have to change yourself for her. If she doesn't like the normal you then maybe she's not worth it (keeping in mind she's still really hot). I know it sounds cliched but it's true.

You could for course put yourslef on the line and just ask her out. She might say no but at least you can stop this insane show. It's win-win, except that you could lose.

Well, good luck.

P.S. A good bit of confidence doesn't hurt.

I didn't have the patience to read anymore posts than this one, to explain this post first of all.

Now, (no offence kev) Do not listen to the above quote.
Don't learn what she likes, it wont make much difference. Talk about what you like, if she doesn't respond well, talk about something else you dont like.
Do not try a romantic gesture. You will come across too strong. It's all well and good when you've nipped her and want to keep her, but as an initial thang, no.
As for the 5th, this aint crap. 'The end justifies the means'.
I wouldn't ask her out straight. Things just don't work that way (much).

My suggestion is to be flirty. Don't just agree with her all the time, if you have a differing opinion, offer some playful competitive arguement. (I say playful, but never concede defeat). Start flirting with her a bit, with some physical contact. If she flirts back, then it should come naturally. (I don't know what to do if not, its never happened to me). when you are alone, lean in for a kiss, at an appropriate moment of course, and lash the lips on to her.

Main thing is, though, to not build the moment up. Don't say to yourself 'do it now, do it now' cos you will find it very hard. And dont build your hopes up. Not for fear of being disappointed, just because admitting things to yourself effects your outward appearence, and its less likely to happen. I like to relate this to karma.

Thats all I can say, its whats worked for me.

And one more thing: attempt at mysterious: BAD. Conveys 'wierd' attitude. Charming: Good.

It wasn't me!

Heh. I think mysterious and the first thing I see is a man in a long dark trench with one hand inside it, his hat pulled down and his collars up. If I had any artistic talent left I'd make some kind of weird stalker comic strip out of that. Stalking people is fun though. Give it a go. You might like it.

taby

Hmmmm i read thru all the above advice and most of it seems to say either
(1) Do sumthin crazy to get her attention

or
(2) Be yourself.

:-)

I think that it really depends on this girl. What does she like? Like if she's into punk rock or if she's into pop and u ask her to go see Metallica and she like westlife its not going to go down too well ya know. Just find someting that shes like and than try and start conversation around that. And seriously though even if you don't look like a million dollars its what's inside that counts cause i've known plenty of stunning people who within seconds make you wanna run away screaming. And if all else fails become her stalker.

Hugh Hefner

taby wrote:

Just find someting that shes like and than try and start conversation around that.

Yeah, cos' that's not exactly what I said in my first post here. <sarcasm detector explodes>

jono087

Just make sure you coincidentally appear near her class or by her bus and then get chattin to the best lookin girl u can find near u........ make her jealous and den just say hi and walk off........

GlitterB

jono087 wrote:

Just make sure you coincidentally appear near her class or by her bus and then get chattin to the best lookin girl u can find near u........ make her jealous and den just say hi and walk off........

this'll only work if ur sure shes into you!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bottle_of_Smoke

GlitterB wrote:

this'll only work if ur sure shes into you!!!!!!!!!!!!

but might make her realise she's into him, and if she looks uncomfortable he'll at least have a fair idea///

any updates original guy?

Undergod

Hugh Hefner wrote:

Yeah, cos' that's not exactly what I said in my first post here. <sarcasm detector explodes>

And if you listen very carefully, you can hear the sound of no-one caring... without any good advice, I really have no business here. Ciao

Crash

stop acting the tit trying to get her attention, talk to her normally not like she's an object of sexual interest, then when you get to know each other a bit say "do you want to go get a drink/go to the movies/get some coffee" etc. - then at the end make sure to walk her home/busstop/taxi etc. will work pretty well

but most of all, stop acting like a tit. :P

Bazookatone

Now THAT'S what I call advice. Thank you all and everyone. I do do lots of pressups and situps anyway, but that's always good advice. I was doing 320 situps in 4 reps of 80, now though I do 2 reps of 60, but I do each one slowly and hold it for a second before dropping, much more effective in my opinion. I'm also back to being able to do 15 chin ups at a time. I'm also stretching the bejeezus out of myself, more flexible than ever.

Unfortunately, geography is against me, as she lives quite far from me, and there are no buses where I live, so I can't "accidentally" meet her on the street or anything.

I saw her at the weekend, we're in an orchestra together and (due to fate or God setting me up for, yet another, metaphorical kick in the groin) we ended up sitting together. So I was nice, I cracked jokes at appropriate moments and I wasn't afraid to laugh at myself (one or two jokes I cracked were deliberately at my own expense, on purpose, to show I'm an easygoing kind of guy), she laughed at my jokes. I asked her questions about herself, what she does, what she's into etc etc (she does ballet, btw, which is cool, at least I think so).

Now, before I read the post that said don't to any overblown romantic gestures, I was going to send her an unsigned Valentine's card (on Valentine's Day) with the lyrics to "Broken" by seether (featuring Amy Lee, you know the one) written inside, because I think those are really romantic lyrics. But I won't now, cause it could come across as stalkery and I'm pretending I'n NOT crazy.

If I do become a stalker, I already have the Night Vision equipment, and the surveillance tactics, so I'm set, but I don't think that'll happen.

Keep posting, all this stuff's great

Hugh Hefner

You're right, that Broken lyrics valentines card is stalkerish. But the principle is good. Maybe just send it unsigned without the lyrics or maybe a small romantic quote or whatever. Just tone down the stalkeryness but the card idea is good.

Bazookatone

What about a quote from the Blink 182 song "Going off to College".

"I haven't been this scared, in a long time,
And I'm so unprepared, so here's my Valentine,
Bouquet of clumsy words, a simple melody,
The world's an ugly place, but you're so beautiful to me."

Personally, I think this is the most romantic sentiments in any song I've ever heard.

StupidLikeAFox

not sure bout the ''worlds an ugly place bit, ya dont want her to think your some manic depressive or anything. How about ''I love you just the way you are'' or something like that....?

jono087

Bazookatone wrote:

I saw her at the weekend, we're in an orchestra together and (due to fate or God setting me up for, yet another, metaphorical kick in the groin) we ended up sitting together. So I was nice, I cracked jokes at appropriate moments and I wasn't afraid to laugh at myself (one or two jokes I cracked were deliberately at my own expense, on purpose, to show I'm an easygoing kind of guy), she laughed at my jokes. I asked her questions about herself, what she does, what she's into etc etc (she does ballet, btw, which is cool, at least I think so).

You know your f*cked if she's on boards and "happens" to stumble across this thread... I know the odds are very, very long, but f it happened it would be so funny (in a very bad way)..

It wasn't me!

Bazookatone wrote:

I already have the Night Vision equipment, and the surveillance tactics

You and Barry are going to get along just fine....

mentalimplosion

jono087 wrote:

You know your f*cked if she's on boards and "happens" to stumble across this thread...

i was about to say that.. if it happened to me, by god, it'd send me running.

jono087

mentalimplosion wrote:

i was about to say that.. if it happened to me, by god, it'd send me running.

lol, true enough, but on the plus side the odds of her actually seeing this is are very long...... and anyway, fair play to the man for having the proverbial balls to post his love for this girl on an on-line board....

StupidLikeAFox

She could just realise he has good intentions and hes a nice guy and stuff and declare her love back











Doubt it though

Bazookatone

She probably won't find this board, and will probably never find this thread, and probably would never link this thread to me, so I'm fairly safe.

So, to summarise.
1) Overblown romantic gesture: NO!
2) Being interested in her: YES
3) Acting disinterested in her : YES (that could generate some confusion!)
4) Be in good shape: YES
5) Stalking: NO!!!!!
6) Being funny, but not crazy, in your face funny: YES
7) Ring her late at night and whisper obscene and perverted, sexually charged comments down the phone: YE....I mean NO!

Keep it comin'

oq4v3ht0u76kf2

Don't analyse everything so much... argggh! Just let what happens happen, you can't force it to happen and you probably can't stop it from happening. The most you can ever do is give things a little nudge forward or delay them for a while, but that's it. If you want to go out with her / kiss her / impregnate her then just ask her, plain and simple, would you like to go to the cinema / whatever (as Neil said). This is the universal sign of "I am interested in you and would like to set up a situation whereby it is only me and you present so we can engage in some conversational mutual masturbation."* And then just have fun.


* Except in Co. Kilkenny, where they're all inbred anyway and have no cinemas, coffee or women.

Undergod

OrangeRhino wrote:

...Except in Co. Kilkenny, where they're all inbred anyway and have no cinemas, coffee or women...

Isn't baseless discrimination wonderful?

GlitterB

except...its not baseless we went to kilkenny one weeekend in session 1 2003 and Bob speaks the truth!!!!

Crash

anymore talk about kilkenny and bad comments about it being discriminatory will result in a banning - i'm looking at YOU undergod.

ll=llannah

for the love of god, just ask her out. if it happens, that's awesome. if it doesn't, it doesn't. analyzing it so much is pointless...and a bit creepy. carpe diem. all you've got to lose is dignity, and no one has much of that anymore.

HeyYou

Indeed, that's the best advice. Too much thinking will turn you neurotic; sometimes being a horny bastard and not thinking so much actually works. Once you don't hump her leg. That's ALWAYS bad. Just be nice!

incredula pert

This is ridiculous. I wish you good luck and all that, but COME ON!

You can't just put attraction down to 8 quick statments that will ensure your success. Stop over analysing, if she likes you-then she likes you. If you try to change to attract her, you'll slip up, end up looking like an idiot, and decreasing yoru chances by about a million. Perhaps if shes a bimbo you'll win her over, but if she has any brains in her head, she won't fall for it. Just be yourself, and yes, there is a possibility she may bot fall for you - but thats just the way it goes. Unrequited love is part of life. Girls aren't idiots, as much as you might think we don't realise you're acting a certain way to try to impress us, we do. When we were young, you use to fight in front of us, and now it has come to this??!
Some girls like boys who are funny, some girls like boys who are quiet, they can prefer them to be shy or ridiculously cocky, many adore romantic gestures, and equally as many prefer being treated like poo. And so therefore bo amount of advice we 'outsiders' can give is really going to help you. If you really want to ask someone for help, talk to her FRIENDS, check out her EXES.

Anyway, I wish you all the best of luck. Right now you're biggest problem seems to be that you lack alot of confidence, and are coming across as desperate.