Could gays save marriage?

Stark

In response to "popular demand", a (kind of) positive article

http://www.brockpress.com/news/2004/12/14/Opinion/Could.Gays.Save.Marriage-828928.shtml?page=1

This past week, the justices of the Supreme Court of Canada said that theoretical gay marriages were just fine by them, but that if the members of Parliament thought that they could con the learned justices into redefining marriage for them and taking the accompanying flack, then Parliament had a whole other thing coming.

I would like to take this time to congratulate my queer friends, as apparently this is a major victory for them, although I'm not quite sure why; their Constitutional rights are still at the mercy of a free vote, where the closet-Conservatives of the Liberal back bench will undoubtedly make it a squeaker.

All this talk about gay marriage has gotten some folks, a disproportionate number of them Albertan, saying that allowing homosexuals to get hitched will end marriage as we know it. They say that it will open the door for people who want to marry siblings, ostriches and inanimate objects in order to claim spousal deduction on their tax returns and get lowered car insurance. Most importantly, it will turn marriage into a mockery of a sacred institution and a shadow of its former self.

Apparently, the bulk of these doomsayers don't have eyes. If they did, they would realize that marriage has been a shadow of its former self for some time now. Be it as a result of liberalized divorce laws or an increase in female earning power - let's face it, one of the reasons our grandmothers were so quick to get ringed-up was because they lacked other options - people are marrying later, divorcing more frequently and some members of our generation are looking at forgoing marriage altogether in favour of long term common law arrangements. To delve into personal anecdotes for a minute, of my dozen or so married friends and acquaintances, one of them is already a divorcee, while another is currently being investigated for immigration fraud as a result of his nuptials. About half of them are in arranged marriages as per their cultural customs, which isn't a bad thing, but is hardly a ringing endorsement of modern marriage. I do know at least one happily married couple who are currently saving for a house, but they still fall somewhat short of the conservative ideal; they're both women.

Marriage is massively fractured; half of you reading this either have divorced parents or are the product of a second family. You know this first hand. That said, the institution is not beyond repair, and it seems as if gay couples may be the ones to do the fixing. In an age where the phrase "starter marriage" has entered the popular lexicon and many people - OK, mostly women - seem to be more interested in their wedding than what comes after, it's refreshing to see people who desperately want to get married for no reason beyond a deep seeded desire to wake-up next to the same person for the rest of their life. It's heartwarming to see young people eagerly look forward to entering the phase of life that involves starter homes, minivans and parent-teacher meetings. The fact that these people are gay is secondary. It seems to me that homosexuals could teach the rest of us a thing or two about what marriage is really about; making a long-term commitment to another person.

If the majority of the House of Commons has any sense, sometime in early 2005 they will usher in an era where it will become common for men to check their watch during happy hour and say "I really have to roll, Dan is making meatloaf tonight" and a lesbians across the country will be forced to explain why little Jimmy insists on eating paste while awkwardly playing with their wedding bands. Let's keep our fingers crossed.