Parrot

BossArky

> > > > A guy decides that he'd like to have a pet and goes
> > > > >to a pet store to shop.
> > > > > After looking around he spots a parrot sitting on a
> > > > >little perch. It doesn't have any feet or legs.
> > > > >The guy wonders out loud, "Geez,I wonder what
> > > > > happened to this parrot?"
> > > > >
> > > > > "I was born this way." says the parrot. "I'm a
> > > > >defective parrot."
> > > > >"Ha, Ha," the guy laughs, looking around and feeling a
> > > > >little silly.
> > > > >
> > > > > "It sounded like this parrot actually understood
> > > > >what I said and answered me."
> > > > >
> > > > > "I understood every word," says the parrot. "I am
> > > > >highly intelligent, thoroughly educated bird."
> > > > >
> > > > > "Yeah?" the guy asks. "Then answer this: how do
> > > > >you hang onto your perch without any feet?"
> > > > >
> > > > > "Well," the parrot says, "this is a little
> > > > >embarrassing, but since you asked,
> > > > > I'll tell you. I wrap my little parrot penis
> > > > >around the wooden bar, kind of like a little hook.
> > > > >You can't see it because of my feathers."
> > > > >
> > > > > "Wow!" says the guy. "You can really understand
> > > > >and answer, can't you?"
> > > > >
> > > > > "Of course! I speak both English and Spanish. I
> > > > >can converse with reasonable competence on almost any
> > > > >subject: politics, religion, sports, physics,
> > > > >philosophy.... and I am especially good at
> > > > >ornithology. You ought to buy me - I am a great
> > > > >companion."
> > > > >
> > > > > The guy looks at the $200 price tag and says, "I
> > > > >can't afford that."
> > > > >
> > > > > "Psst," the parrot hisses, motioning the guy over
> > > > >with one wing. "Nobody wants me because I don't have
> > > > >any feet. You can get me for $20 ... just make
> > > > > an offer" The guy offers $20 and walks out with
> > > > >the parrot.
> > > > >
> > > > > Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He's
> > > > >funny and interesting, he's a great pal. He
> > > > >understands everything, sympathizes and gives good
> > > > >advice.
> > > > >
> > > > > The guy is delighted. One day the guy comes home
> > > > >after work and the parrot says, "Psst" and motions
> > > > >him over with one wing. The guy goes over to the cage.
> > > > >
> > > > > "I don't know if I should tell you this or not,"
> > > > >says the parrot, "but it is about your wife and
> > > > >the mailman." "What?" says the guy. "What??"
> > > > >"Well," says the parrot, "when the mailman came to
> > > > >the door today, your wife greeted him in a sheer
> > > > >nightgown and kissed him on the mouth."
> > > > >
> > > > > "What happened then?" asks the guy.
> > > > >
> > > > > "Then the mailman came into the house and lifted up
> > > > >the nightgown and began petting her all over" reported
> > > > >
> > > > >the parrot.
> > > > >
> > > > > "My God!!!" the guy says. "Then what?!?"
> > > > >
> > > > > "Then he lifted up the nightgown and began to lick
> > > > >her body, starting with her breasts and slowly down,
> > > > >down, down............"
> > > > >
> > > > > The parrot paused a long time.
> > > > >
> > > > > "What happened? What happened?" asks the frantic
> > > > >guy.
> > > > >
> > > > > "I don't know," says the parrot.
> > > > >
> > > > > "My dick got hard and I fell off my perch."
> >

Shiminay

Nice 'un m8!

---

All the best,

Dav
@B^)
My page of stuff

kayos

Ahh yes the classics are always the best I remeber that one from my days in scouts about 9-10 years ago

Kayos

SantaHoe

Brilliant!
I've never heard that one (old as it may be).

7/10 (points deducted for those annoying ">>>"'s)