Face Lift

Lucutus

A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and
feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a
news-stand and buys a paper.

Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 35."

"I'm actually 47," the man says happily.

A little while later he goes to McDonalds for lunch and asks the order taker
the same question, to which the reply is, "I'd guess that you're 29?"

"Nope, I am actually 47." He's starting to feel really good about himself.
While standing at the bus stop he asks an old woman the same question.
She replies, "I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young
there was a sure way of telling a mans age. If I put my hand down your
pants and play with your penis for about ten minutes I will be able to tell your exact age."

As there was no one else around the man thought what the hell and let her
slip her hand down his pants. Ten minutes later the old lady says, "OK, it's done. You are 47."

Stunned the man says, "That was brilliant!
How did you do that?"

The old lady replies, "I was behind you in McDonalds."

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Lucutus of Borg

Lump

LOL, Dirty aul Wench.

John

[SN]JAG

hehe

sounds like somthing kegs would do

Blitzkrieger

now THAT's a smiley!

Stephen

Teeheehee

Shiminay

That smiley sex gif rules!!!

---

All the best,

Dav
@B^)
My page of stuff

Molly

Where did you get those smilies?

Shiminay

All you need to do to see where something came from is right-click on it and view it's properties.

Alternatively, you can go here and see them for yourself

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All the best,

Dav
@B^)
My page of stuff

Molly

thanks kharn

Hobbes

Some of those smileys are hilarious.

Some are just plain werid.