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lonely hearts

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  • 28-11-2000 11:05pm
    #1
    stu_69
    Registered Users Posts: 568 ✭✭✭


    LONELY HEARTS COLUMN IN MINISTRY OF SOUND MAG THIS MONTH.
    >
    >ARE YOU AGED 18-30,female,slim build,into hardcore techno, a
    >recent graduate and into politics? Then **** off! I want a
    >****-thick 16 year old handbag bird with no opinions and massive tits!
    >Reply to xxxx
    >
    >WHERE YOU THE GIRL with braids, blue T-shirt,platform
    >trainers,dancing to left of the stage during JFK's set at
    >Passion last Friday? I was the guy curled up under the speaker
    >stack.I meant to talk to you but I was hallucinating and I thought you had
    >a wolf's head and flippers. But I'm ok now!
    >Reply to xxxx
    >
    >ATTENTION ALL MAD clubheads in the Toxteth area going to
    >Cream this weekend. Me and my mates are going to nick all your valuables
    >while you're out because we're thieving scally *******s.
    >Reply to xxxx
    >
    >IF YOU ARE a group of around four house fans in the Acton
    >High Street area of West London and you're particularly into old
    >skool Chicago sounds,please turn your stereo down because some of
    >us are ****ing trying to get some ******* sleep.
    >Reply to xxxx
    >
    >WANTED: Cocaine. Lots of it. xxxx
    >
    >ARE YOU THE TALL BLACK-HAIRED GUY in the black and silver
    >Versace shirt who I shagged in the Ministry toilets about three
    >months ago without any form of birth control. Please write to me.
    >I'd...ummmm...love to hear from you. Just to see how you are
    >and stuff. Don't worry,there's nothing to worry about. Really.
    >It's just that I'm going to have a...ummm...a PARTY! Yes,that's it. A
    >party.
    >Reply xxxx
    >
    >ARE YOU THE man standing three feet away from me at the bar
    >in Fabric, smiling weakly and smelling rather too strongly of
    >Issey Miyake? Because if you look at my tits one more time, I am
    >going to glass you.
    >Reply to xxxx
    >


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