Movie Previews from the UL Multi-plex

Lord Khan · 23-02-2001 9:42pm #1

Upcoming movies in the UL Cinema

Teenage Mutant Binging Hurlers:

THe epic tale of a hardy group of hurlers from the nether regions of Galways.
They appear to have mutated and developed an extraordinary tolerance for alchol.
They gather every night on the Astroturf to have a puck around and to consume
huge quantities of drink.Please note: hurling scnese are very explict and not
suitable for young children.

Falling Down:

John Brown is a quiet, studious first year in UL. However, after he is give
a £15 fine for late registration, John flips. He goes on a psychotic rampage
through out the grounds of the univeristy. The library, games room and Scholars
comprise the setttings for a number of violent confrontations. John insists
that all he wants to do is get back to his digs on time for dinner, but people
keep 'getting in his way'.

The Sixth Sense:

The remarkable story of Mile, A young first year. Mike posesses and amazing
'sixth sense', for he has the ability to smell out alchol on any part of the
UL campus. He is helped through this traumatic time by a group of approximately
400 selfless, caring UL students. Mike's Catchphrase "...I see drunk people".

Mortal Wombat:

The setting is the Stables Courtyard, All the small, furry rodents of Limerick
descend upon the Courtyard to take part in the ultimate competition: a fight
to the death. The last wombat left standing is victorious, claiming the coveted
prize a voucher for a free pint of Bud.

Road Trip:

This is the harrowing tale of a small town university tragedy. This University
hides a terrible secret. Within the murky depths of the grounds of UL, there
lies a badly laid, slightly uneve pedestrian crossing. Each night visited upon,
UL countless unsuspecting student ... ehhh ... fall over.

The Clare Hitch Project:

A Group of four close friends decide to hith their way to Co. Clare. THeir aim:
to document the uncharted regions of the Burren. They were never seen again.
ALl that was found was some footage with recored their terrifying tale as one
by one, they disappear down the Burren's Bottomless crevices. In summer 2001,
watch out for the sequel, The Adarve Ditch Project: Book of Bogs.

Schindler's ****ed:

This new comedy tells the story of Dietrich Schindler. Dietrich is a German
Exchange student with no alcohol tolerance. He is taken out to the Lodge by
his new UL friends determined to cure him of his 'little problem'. This leads
to Dietrichs's involvement in many hilarious drunken capers!

If Only We Hadn't Drank So Much, Maybe We Could Have Done Something Last Summer:

This is the terrifying tale of 5 young Limerick Teenagers. They are a bunch
of ****less losers. But these wasters hide a dark secret, of which nonee of
them will speak. Last summer, they planned to do something really cool and morbid,
like killing somebody, buyt due to enormous alcohol consumption, never actually
got around to doing it.