A couple of good ones for ya !!!

Lump

Dodgy

John

Yo Mamma

Two old ladies were outside their nursing home having a smoke (that's the only place they could smoke at the nursing home) when it started to rain.

One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.

Lady 2: "What's that?"

Lady 1: "A condom."

Lady 2: "Where'd you get it?"

Lady 1: "You can get them at any drugstore."

The next day, Lady 2 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a package of condoms. The guy looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, in her 80s), but politely asks what brand she prefers. "Doesn't matter," she replies, "as long as it fits a Camel."

Or or wait it gets better ..........

The old couple were planning to go on a second honeymoon for their 50th wedding anniversary.
The old woman said, "We will go to all the same places that we did on our first honeymoon."
"Uh huh," said the old man.
"We will do all the things that we did on our first honeymoon," said the old woman.
"Uh huh," said the old man.
"And we will make love like we did on our first honeymoon," said the old woman.
"That's right," said the old man, "except this time I get to sit on the side of the bed and cry, 'It's too big, it's too big!'"

LOL

tobi

Hmmm

smoke.me.a.kipper

lol

2nd one much better.

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-ciaran

This post has been brought to you by the letter C, and the number 7.