Reasons Why Sheep are Better than Women

bubbles · 05-04-2001 4:57pm #1

A sheep won't care of you keep your fish bait in the refrigerator.

A sheep won't get even with you by spending your paycheck on new clothes, none of which are see-through or meant to be worn in the bedroom.

A sheep will never sue you for alimony.

A sheep won't care if you screw her sister.

A sheep won't care if your secretary is better looking than she is.

A sheep will never tell you the ceiling needs to be painted while you're screwing.

A sheep won't use your razor to shave it's legs, or your pocketknife to open a paint can.

A sheep never has a headache.

A sheep won't give your favorite hunting shirt to Goodwill.

A sheep won't leave wet nylons hanging all over the bathroom.

A sheep will never ask you to stop on the way home from work and pick up a box of tampons.

Sheep grow their own fur coats.

A sheep will never leave a vibrator on the living room couch when you're having friends over to watch football.

Sheep won't cheat on you with your best friend.

A sheep will never ask if you'll still respect her in the morning.

Sheep aren't into talking before or after sex.

A sheep never yells at you for leaving the lid up.

A sheep won't send you out for batteries for her vibrator.

A sheep doesn't think it's demeaning or kinky to do it doggy style.

A sheep won't mind if you put up mirrors in the bedroom.

Sheep are "ram tough."

A sheep won't think you're cheap and tacky if you: send daisies instead of long-stemmed red roses, tip less than 20%, wear Levis with a hole in the seat, open beer bottles with your teeth.

Sheep don't mind if you leave the lights on.

Sheep don't mind doing it in the morning.

Sheep don't mind doing it in a pickup truck.

A sheep will never use the excuse that: she just did her nails, it's too hot, it's too cold, you'll wake the kids, you'll wake the neighbors, she's too drunk to enjoy it,she's not drunk enough to
enjoy it.