Slaps Dealt Out After Supply Boat Hijacked By Missing Link.

Oh yeah

Tourists witnessed an extraordinary display of brute savagery and extreme violence in Cork Harbour, Ireland earlier this morning. Apparantly an illegal shipment of fish destined for the IRA (the Irish wing of the Chale Party) was hijacked en route by the missing link. When the smuggled mackerel did not arrive the Idiot's Republic Attacking-types Dealt Out Slaps to anyone they deemed to be "lookin' at me funny". This age old Celtic custom resulted in numerous head injuries. The Dealing Out of Slaps is the basis for the sports of hurling and Gaelic football, which involve variously sticks, balls (or lack thereof(due to the sticks, see)) and, in extrem cases, teeth. The IRA intended to whomp the cars of British officials in Northern Ireland with the contraband gilled items as a method of gaining revenge for the fact that their predecessors agreed to give the aformentioned six counties over to the English. Irish Politics are complicated and consist of many and varied interpersonal relationships and basically nobody really knows how much money Charly Haughy embezzelled during his stint as Taoiseach, and he has, apparantly, forgotten. The Chief Of Police has dismissed this claim as "a likely story" and intends to interrogate every single cow on Dublin soil. Haughy's reaction was that the proverbial cheese was sliding off the proverbial cracker. He believes in his cell system and ruthless training ensures that even if some cows break, the whole story cannot be extricated. Meanwhile the missing link has been spotted in Scotland, but like so many other Scottish myths (such as Loch Ness Monster and The "premier" League) nobody cares as long as they stay out of the way.


<ROCK>Will Larkin<HARD PLACE>
For Channel Neus, Bono Estenté.

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Looks to me like that grass could use a little H2Oh Yeah!

Celt

bleah
not great