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One way or the other

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  • 25-05-2001 3:10pm
    #1
    Shagus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 234 ✭✭



    The ship's steward stopped at the rail of the ship during a
    particularly rough ocean crossing and gazed compassionately
    at the man who's slumped position over the rail and whose
    intensity of gaze towards the depths betokened all too well
    the ravages of seasickness.

    Gently, the steward patted the man's shoulder. "Cheer up,
    sir," he murmured. "I know it seems bad, but really, you know,
    nobody ever dies of seasickness."

    The afflicted gentleman lifted his greenish, tortured face to
    his comforter and gasped in hoarse accents. "Don't say that,
    man. For heaven's sake, don't say that. It's only the hope of
    dying that's keeping me alive."

    A very anal-retentive woman was shopping in a furniture store
    for a new mattress. As she bent over to examine the tenth
    mattress she had considered, she suddenly let out a
    horrendous fart.

    "Excuse me," she said, embarrassed, to the clerk who was
    helping her.

    "Heck, I'm used to it, lady," he said. "When you see the price
    on that one, your gonna ****!"



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