Surgury ! (yeuch!!)

Yo Mamma

After her fifth child, Lucy decided that she should have some cosmetic surgery “down below” to restore herself to her former youthful glory cos her gammon was dangling a bit too low and looked like a ripped out fireplace. Time and childbirth had taken its toll and she reckoned that, with five children now being the limit, she’d tidy things with a nip here and a tuck there so it looked more like a piggy bank slot rather than a badly packed kebab.

Following the operation she awoke from her anaesthetic to find three roses at the end of the bed. “Who are these from?” she asked the nurse, “They’re very nice but I’m a bit
confused as to why I’ve received them.

“Well” said the nurse, “The first is from the surgeon - the operation went so well and you were such a model patient that he wanted to say thanks”.
“Ahhh, that’s really nice” said Lucy.
“The second is from your husband - he’s delighted the operation was such a success that he can’t wait to get you home. Apparently it’ll be the first time he’s touched the sides for years and he’s very excited!”.

“Brilliant!” said Lucy.”And the third?”.
“That’s from Eric in the burns unit” said the nurse. “He just wanted to say
thanks for his new ears.”

:P

smoke.me.a.kipper

sick, sick, sick.

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i invented '.com'

Shiminay

True, but awful funny!

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All the best!
Dav
@B^)
So Bob Hoskins was about to roll a spliff when in walks Dana with her 3 foot Bong
[honey i] violated [the kids]
When the Beefy King arrives, I shall be paying homage with Puunack The Receiver in a haze of green curry.

Lump

HAR HAR HAR, I like it in a sick kind of way


John

TheWolf

hehehe, makes me sick, in a wonderful, wonderful way .... err, i mean, good un mate

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Sanity = normal, normal = majority, majority = pop culture, therefore pop culture = sanity and we are all SO screwed...

entropi

nice joke, heard it before but it's still good, and what happened to the S.M.A.K logo man?

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"that island has freedom written all over it, sir, that's cuba"

smoke.me.a.kipper

this one??



half the time i forget to add it.

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i invented '.com'