SIPPING VODKA

Spunog UIE

SIPPING VODKA


A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could
hardly
speak.
After
mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.

The monsignor replied, "When I am worried about getting
nervous
on

the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass.
If I start to get nervous, I take a sip."

So next Sunday he took the monsignor's advice. At the
beginning
of
the
sermon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to
talk up
a
storm.
Upon his return to his office after mass, he found the
following
note
on
the door:

1. Sip the Vodka, don't gulp.
2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3. There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4. Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J. C.
7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as
Daddy,
Junior and the Spook.
8. David slew Goliath, he did not kick the **** out of him.
9. When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his
donkey,
don't
say
he was stoned off his ass.
10. We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T."
11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said,
"Take
this
and
eat it for it is my body." He did not say "Eat me"
12. The Virgin Mary is not called "Mary with the Cherry,"
13. The recommended grace before a meal is not:
Rub-A-Dub-Dub
thanks
for
the grub, yeah God.
14. Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at
St.Peter's,
not
a peter pulling contest at St.Taffy's.

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Lump

OLD news

John

Karl Hungus

Owned beyond all recognition!!! !!!






I liek Vodka!!!

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Where Is Your Millenium?
Where Is Your Kingdom Of A Thousand Years?
What You See Is A World Of Hate, Of Pitiness
Never To Be Set In State
What You See Is What You Get