Heard a funny story in college

Chinafoot

my mate told me a story about a girl she knows and it made me laugh so i thought i'd share.

A girl gets on the dart and she sits down opposite a fella a little bit older than her. she's sitting there for a bit and remembers that she has one of those yellow Snack bars sitting on the table. She opens the bar and takes the first piece.

The guy sitting across from her takes the second piece. The girl thinks this is very odd but says nothing. She takes the third piece, the man reaches over and takes the fourth, she takes the fifth and then the guy takes the last piece. So the girl is well píssed off at this stage but still says nothing.

A few minutes later the guy takes out a chocolate muffin and puts it on the table. The girl decides to get revenge by opening the muffin, pulling off the top piece and throwing it at the strange man! the man is quite shocked and says "what the hell are you doing you freak?" Luckily the dart is now at the girl's stop so she gets off fuming.

So anyway the girl gets to college and is telling her mates about this weirdo on the train......then she opens her bag......and finds her yellow Snack bar!

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heard another good one, true story too!

A girl was on the pill for 2 years and was with her boyfriend for a year and a half. They always used condoms but one night they were caught short and went bareback. The girl figured it would be ok.
Unfortunately the girl got pregnant. She was very confused about this, having been on the pill for so long. So when she went to the doctor she asked him how could it have happened. The conversation went a little something like this:

Girl: I dont understand how this could've happened. I've been on the pill for two years.
Dr: Have you been taking it at the same time everyday?
Girl: yes
Dr: have you been taking it with water?
Girl: (confused) water??
Dr: eh, have you been swallowing it?
Girl: (very very confused) swallow!?!?!?

turns out that for two years this poor girl had been *inserting* the pill in a very different area!!!

(my friend knows some strange people!!)

Gone West

aw! dont believe that pill thing!!! did they just build up in there?

Ron DMC

Firstly, since when are there tables on the dart,

Secondly thats just an alternative take on a douglas adams story from years ago about a packet of digestives.

Chinafoot

hey i'm just saying what she told me! so relax the kaks there pal.
i found it funny so i thought i'd share.

and as for the pill thingy....she works with that girl as far as i know so i dont think shes making it up. although if it was me i wouldnt tell anyone i'd be so embarassed! i'd imagine they'd just dissolve or maybe fall out when she peed or something. who knows.

Goodshape

First story I've heard before. As Ronny Mitchell pointed out, I think it was from Dougles Adams. For shame.

The second story was funnier but I don't believe it.

Nidge

Maybe if the girl was a complete idiot i would believe that, surely there would be directions on the packet or whatever. Did she expect the tablet to neutralise what had gone in her? what the feck.

Chinafoot

Nidge wrote:

Maybe if the girl was a complete idiot i would believe that, surely there would be directions on the packet or whatever. Did she expect the tablet to neutralise what had gone in her? what the feck.

yea i know its crazy. but like i say i'm only passing on a funny story that i heard. this is a humour board afterall. :rolleyes:
wasnt aware that comedy required such indepth analysis....just enjoy the humour for fúck sake and stop thinking so much!

joe.

made me laugh

Ron DMC

yeah you're right, it is a good story just mentioning that i'd heard it before

The pill one is still quite incredible.
Funny though

el Bastardo

I've actually had a similar thing happen to me in a pub with my smokes when a friend thought it would be funny to hide my cigarettes (which had been on the table along with several others of the same brand). Nearly had a bad ending.

rugbug86

its like the age old one about people trying to eat suppossitories (spelt wrong, i know) thinking they're tablets for eating not putting up your bum

memphis

Good those, first one i can see happening ok, but the second is doubtful! Still funny though!

Velvet Vocals

There are people with special needs that know that you don't put the pill up your *****
No way is that true :rolleyes: