I think I've just found my Nemesis.

Karl Hungus

Now, as there's rarely a month that goes by without some utterly needless remake being greenlighted and me fuming about, I just had to break the news that I've uncovered something horrific! Something bloodcurdling, something so evil that it would make Hitler wince, something worse than Tarantino! :eek: :eek: :eek:

Yes, I did just say that.
Infact, far worse than Tarantino!

Now I'm sure some of the more regular film board posters are gasping in awe at this point, wondering what could be so unspeakable as to outright dwarf my seething hatred of the Q man? Well, prepare yourselves gentlemen, because this I'm about to introduce you to the source of some of the greatest evil in the motion picture industry today!

Gentlem... BEHOLD!
The one man responsible for the needless remake of every single Asian movie today:

Roy Lee

Yes, just ONE man is responsible for all this evil!
So far, he has produced The Ring, The Grudge and The Ring Two. But his imdb profile reads like an obituaries column of Asian films currently up for being butchered, with The Eye, Ikiru, and Oldboy to name but a few! This man should be shot! :mad:

So, while I might've wondered before, just who's bright idea was it to turn Il Mare into a turgid Sandra Bullock platform, or just what kind of brain-spasm was required to place the writer of the cinematic abortion that was Gothica in a position to write a remake of The Eye, but never before had I imagined it was all the work of just one man. This is just a smack in the gob. Tarantino is a saint compared to this guy!

Hugh Hefner

What's wrong with Tarantino?

ixoy

Hugh Hefner wrote:

What's wrong with Tarantino?

Oh sh1t don't get him started on this again

Mossy Monk

Tarantino is evil. the internet told me

Karl Hungus

Hugh Hefner wrote:

What's wrong with Tarantino?

Seriously man, take Ixoy's advice and don't get me started. Just search up an old thread, and you'll see.

mycroft

Karl Hungus wrote:

Now I'm sure some of the more regular film board posters are gasping in awe at this point, wondering what could be so unspeakable as to outright dwarf my seething hatred of the Q man? Well, prepare yourselves gentlemen, because this I'm about to introduce you to the source of some of the greatest evil in the motion picture industry today!
!

Yeah he does seem to display the cinematic tastes that spanish deep sea trawlers use, plowing into international waters and scoping up all that he can find.

Whats with another remake of the bodysnatchers? Was there some contractable obiligation in the remake, must re make this film every 10-15yos. The 70s version still scares the bejaysus out of.

Care to imagine what the santitised version of oldboy will be like?

He's working on a Jim Sheridan project, that could be your way in....

Pugsley

Now all you need to do is grow your hair again, so you can be sponsored to shave it all off, again, gather funding, and hunt this bugger down

TerrorFirmer

I watched the Ring, Ring 2 and the Grudge (the remakes)

I enjoyed all 3 of them them, and there are far more that enjoyed them then didn't enjoy them, which alone is pretty obvious based on the fact there are respective sequels here/on the way. So for you maybe this man is the worst, but not for the majority of us, not by a long shot!

Now, a man in the movie industry we can ALL agree to hate....

Uwe Boll!

nadir

yeah, this guy does suck indeed.

Hugh Hefner

MobileInfantry wrote:

Now, a man in the movie industry we can ALL agree to hate....

Uwe Boll!

Oh God yes.

Creature

I can just see it now....

"Karl Hungus vs. Roy Lee"

Directed by Uwe Boll and starring Bruce Campbell.

Karl Hungus

Creature wrote:

I can just see it now....

"Karl Hungus vs. Roy Lee"

Directed by Uwe Boll and starring Bruce Campbell.

It won't be a patch on the original.

OfflerCrocGod

Karl Hungus wrote:

It won't be a patch on the original.

ROFL
Honestly though I have to agree that there is no need for all these remakes. If Americans can't take some foreign lingo tough sh*t to them I say. Why can't they just appreciate the originals?

ShiverinEskimo

There truely nothing worse than ****ty remakes. If anything they serve to make you rush back to the original to get rid of the badness.

G4 singing Bohemian Rhapsody (i know, not film but a relevant example of evil personified).

For a funny review of G4's album by the way read entertainment.ie's music reviews page. Crucified it.

Creature

Karl Hungus wrote:

It won't be a patch on the original.

Maybe, but it will feature Tara Reid in a tight revealing outfit.

Fysh

MobileInfantry wrote:

I watched the Ring, Ring 2 and the Grudge (the remakes)

I enjoyed all 3 of them them, and there are far more that enjoyed them then didn't enjoy them, which alone is pretty obvious based on the fact there are respective sequels here/on the way. So for you maybe this man is the worst, but not for the majority of us, not by a long shot!

Now, a man in the movie industry we can ALL agree to hate....

Uwe Boll!

No doubt many enjoyed them, and therefore contributed lots of money to people who are now getting greedy and looking to repeat the cycle, but:

(as has been argued many a time) the reason these remakes succeed is because they pander to the general audience and their conception of horror (ie "tense" bits with jangly violin music, lots of audiovisual shock moments to get you jumping out of your chair, etc). They may be popular, but they're crap horror compared to the original. Seriously - watch the original grudge and compare it to the remake. Sure, the original has crappier production values. But because it's not so concerned with slick FX, it manages to have far more tension overall than the remake (whose only actual scary bit was with the sister in the office building). Ditty Ring and, from what I hear (I refuse to waste either bandwidth or money in order to watch a remake of an already crap film) Ring 2. But, you know, that argument's been had repeatedly on the Horror Forum and isn't really worth rehashing unless new points come to the table.

I have to say, though - they're remaking The Eye? Language aside, that already felt like an American Horror film to me anyway, with certain negative connotations attached. No doubt they'll butcher the worthwhile aspects in search of Joe Retard's cinema dollar, though. *sigh*

Hugh Hefner

Fysh wrote:

in search of Joe Retard's cinema dollar, though. *sigh*

Hahahahahahahahaha! I'm stealing that phrase.

Karl Hungus

Speaking of retards though, even the goobers at imdb.com seem to concede that the original grudge was superior, comparing the ratings of the original to the remake, it's clear which comes out on top. Also comparing the ratings over at rotten tomatoes, the original comes way ahead of the remake.

So indeed, as Fysh says, they may be popular, but they're crap.

Xcom2

OfflerCrocGod wrote:

ROFL
Honestly though I have to agree that there is no need for all these remakes. If Americans can't take some foreign lingo tough sh*t to them I say. Why can't they just appreciate the originals?

Because quite a lot of them cant,

A: read subtitles and eat popcorn at the same time.

B: read

C: believe a movie is a movie unless its an American movie

Take your pick.

X

solo1

That's not necessarily true.

Akira Kurosawa's "Seven Samurai" was remade as "The Magnificent Seven", and no one hates that movie. His "Yojimbo" was remade, almost scene-for-scene, as "For a Fistful of Dollars", which rocks. I can't think of any more off-hand. Maybe it only works for Japanese samurai movies that are turned into Westerns.

I'd like to see Hollywood remake "Aguirre: Der Xorn Gottes". Heh heh.

bopper

If he brought us the grudge then im a fan.

Karl Hungus

solo1 wrote:

Maybe it only works for Japanese samurai movies that are turned into Westerns.

Evidentally not, because they tried to remake Rashomon as western, which turned out to be a disaster.

Playboy

Ive been a fan of Asian cinema for a long time ... and most of the time I am unimpressed by any remakes but i gotta say that I really enjoyed the remake of the Ring far more than any of the originals. .. tbh I think there is certain amount of snobbery involved when I here people put the original movies up on a pedestal and slate the remake all the time .. the fact is that a lot of people wont sit through a sub-titled movie and in remakes they get a chance to see a quality story from a different culture that they might never have seen. Now the remakes a lot of the time are not not as good as the originals but noone is making people go to see the remake so I dont really understand why ppl whine so much. If you are into foreign and arthouse cinema then well done .. pat urself on the back for being open minded and intellectual .. but for gods sake there are a lot of ppl who dont take cinema as serious as u and like to be entertained by mindless crap and its not a big deal.