Cat sh1t is killing my lawn

magpie

Anyone got any suggestions that actually work for keeping cats off your grass?

And I don't want to receive either of the following replies:

1) Cats won't sh1t on it if you mow it regularly: I do, and they still do

2) Any kind of whiney 'I Love cats and its all the humans fault' type responses

kittenkiller

2l green bottles (like 7up or something) filled with water situated around your lawn usually does the trick.

Apparently the cats get spooked by their own reflection (& scarper off into your neighbours garden)!

garthv

Set up a sniper range on your roof and take a week off work.
Order a high powered Pellet Rifle usually bought for killing rats.
Camp out for one week and take out any of the mangy little fecks that decide to intrude on your territory.
Problem Solved.

Villain

Yep that will do the trick you might need quite a few though depending on the size of the lawn.

c - 13

If you dont keep animals yourself then most garden centres sell all sorts of repellant for cats/dogs.
Also agree with kittenkiller about the 2L bottles. This is supposed to work.
There is another way but you wouldnt do it for a lawn - its only for flower beds etc. - if you take a load of little sticks 2 - 3" and cut the tops at an angle, then push them into the bed the cats wont go into it. Dont know the theory on this but it definatly does work.
***NOTE*** - Before anyone gives me backlash on this being cruel etc ... this method is perfectly safe to the animals because they wont go near the sticks in the first place.

magpie

I've tried the 2llitre bottles to no avail.

Haven't tried the mini punji-stakes though!

Anyone with a rifle want to come and solve this problem for me?

Glipmac

LAND MINES thus you dont need to take a week of work and you can have an instant BBQ true you wont have much of a lawn left but that's what fake grass is for (just don't let anyone in your garden for a month or so) also stops burglars, birds and vermin sorted!

Glip

Kernel

Get a dog.

Glipmac

Or if you want Rabid Squirrels

see below (Good Rates) you've gotta pay'em or they'll ave your nuts!

Glip :cool:

Villain

Rat posion mixed in with liver

Arcadian

Put pin holes in the bottles of water, cats won't mess beside a water source.

Esel

THought cats buried their crap? Not because they're clean - because it stinks like you would not believe!

Bottles idea is an urban legend.

mad m

While in gardening section is woodies,seen a cat repellant you spray/place in your garden.Nearly dropped when i seen the price €40+....I myself put non-drying paint on tops of walls.Was great seeing them climb up wall and sliding off with a force onto neighbours garden.But the non-drying paint dried .And i was left with black paw prints all over the place....pesky cats.

PH01

I've got the same problem with those little fuuuckers. They do their plops right in the middle of the lawn and then scrape some moss (I know, my lawn isn't that healthy but it's north facing) over it.
So, what I did was spread some of my own urine around the garden - do that every week or so. The little ****s haven't been back since.

magpie

So, what I did was spread some of my own urine around the garden - do that every week or so. The little ****s haven't been back since

OK, sounds good to me. Can't smell any worse than cat sh1t anyway. Plus there's a certain satisfaction in marking your own territory.

Stoner

I bought cat spikes, they worked for a while, now their feet have hardened up, i have since ordered carpet grippers ( recommended here ) the cat spikes are good but very expensice. i ended up with about 50 of em at 1 euro a pop that was relatively good value.

all the stuff like pepper powder that you get in woodies is ok but it washes off, I have one of those things that blasts off a sound when they come near it , cost me 60 euro in Atlantic, they more or less crap on it.
Woodies are selling two bottles of the green crystals for 7 euro, they are not too bad, but i think they just give off a lime smell that they dont like.
I have shot em with water pistols, filled with water, water + lemon juice and diluted jayes fluid, they are ment to hate jeyes fluid, you might aswell try that as there is other stuff that woodies sell that is more or less the same smell and texture as jeyes fluid but costs alot more.
One of my neighbours cats has a light brown stripe on his black coat where i got him with one of my mixtures.
After a year of my war with cats, they at least run away when they see me, on the other hand i receive dirty looks from my neighbours when i chase the cats away and fit spikes to the top of my walls,
I have a few thorny bushes planted around where they climb the walls so I expect big things from them this year, plenty of loving care goes into those bushes.
The water bottles only work when it is very sunny and the glare scares the cats.
My extension roof is like some sort of cat Chicken Ranch , where cats come to crap, ride and set off my security light to attract flying insects so they can catch and eat em. We dont like each other, the cats , me and most likely my cat loving neighbours. The only thing really is
a) a Dog
b) some tiger crap
C) to kill them.

option A) is out as I am out too much
C) is too heavy dont really want to hurt em, just a clean roof and a quiet night
maybe I'll make a trip to the zoo.

magpie

Glad I'm not the only one. I fantasise about some kind of cat trap based around a trebuchet disguised as a sand pit. When they settle down to take a sh1t it catapults them 200 metres at a 45 degree angle. Must invent one.

Stoner

LOL, my boot does the same trick, the woman (and her son c/w sons best live in friend) seem to love cats, i counted 9 once, yet their place is spotless. The guys seem ok , but one remarked that he hoped that cats would not be disturbed by me building an extension, hopefully not i said, theres me thinking that my garden came with the house. Anyway they just seem to have transferred to an up stairs jacks by using the roof, I actually though that when i had paved the back and built on the rest that they would no longer use my place as a toilet, sadly i was wrong.
anyway best of luck if you figure something out let me know.

Stoner

http://www.deteracat.co.uk/products/catspikes.html

http://www.pestcontroldirect.co.uk/acatalog/Other_Garden_Pests__cats_dogs_moles_rabbits_etc_.html

Dan_B

Has anyone tried finding out who owns the cats, scraping up the 5hite and dumping it on their front doorstep.

"jeyes fluid in a super soaker", defenitley gonna try that.

Think the next time im up North I'll be buying a few BB guns.

daveg

We had similar problems but with dogs not cats. Our next door neighbours (cúnts) have 5 king Charles dogs. Stupidest animals ever to walk the earth. They used to continually use our garden as their toilet. There was just a wire fence between the 2 houses. We kept our cool and decided not to fall out with the neighbours over it. They built a wall this year so we thought thank god that's the end of that. Then I saw them letting out the dogs one day and the fvckers ran up their drive, onto the road, and in through our gates and proceeded to again shít all over my garden. Bear in mind we had paid the guts of E6000 to get our grounds levelled and seeded for my 5 year old son so he could play soccer etc. Now we were constantly telling him not to go onto the grass cause off all the dog shít (I once went around and picked it all up with a bucket and shovel - there was so much it filled the bucket). Anyway I mentioned to the neighbours sons (who let the dogs out - 14 year olds) would they mind watching the dogs when they are let out as the keep shítting in my garden. 2 weeks later I look out my window.... all 5 dogs are in my garden. I lost the fúcking rag. Went round next door and asked (politely honest - I mentioned we couldn't let my sons play on the grass cause of all the dog shít) the neighbours wife would she remove her dogs from my garden. She went off the head about me telling her sons about the dogs and I should have told her etc etc, and how it was my responsibility to keep her dogs out of my garden (by building a wall all the way round my boundary). I told her I'd be in touch with the dog warden if I saw her dogs outside her property again.

We have since sold the house. Why do some people have to be so unreasonable.

prospect

If you know who owns the cats:
Call over and tell them that if you catch their cat sh1tting on your lawn again, you'll kill the little bugger.
Then let them worry about it.

I know you lot will come back and say, thats not very neighbourly, but neither is letting your damn pet roam around sh1teing everywhere.
Also, if you have kids, grandkids, nieces & nephews etc, cat excrement is very very dangerous. So i would take the problem very seriously.