Anyone have any experience in gay sex?

adser53

Hi,

Just writing to find out a few details about gay sex. I "came out" as they say about a year ago. So im still a bit shy. I just need to find out if it hurts and if anybody has any tips? Such as what lube to use or condoms. etc

Would it be a good idea to go and get gay porn and the like to see how they do it?

All help is appreciated on this issue, i hope ye guys can help me out.

thanks alot!

swiss

I know some one else suggested you should post here, but there not sure this is quite the LBG questioning mentioned in the charter.

It is still a valid issue, and those are valid questions.

I'm *ahem* not the most authoritive person to answer those questions you asked. Nevertheless I'll try to address some of your queries.

Firstly, gay sex is not all about anal sex. In fact I know a few gay people who find the act quite distasteful. You will find that certain people prefer different techniques, for example oral sex, rimming, wánking etc. You shouldn't feel that you have to follow any of these particular practices if you don't want to, and you should remember that you can achieve intimacy (if not sexual release) without sexual contact.

Also, some gay people tend to fall into certain roles, which are loosely described as "top" and "bottom" (I'll let you figure out what this means). Again, it is important that you do not simply fall into a role such as this due to shyness or whatever. You should go with whatever you and your partner feel most comfortable with.

Anal sex can hurt, yes. This is especially true if the "active" partners member is quite large, or if he happens to be going quickly or roughly. Of course, some people find this sort of contact desirable, so your milage may vary. In order to minimise pain, it is important to:

a) relax
b) use plenty of lubricant
c) take it slowly

Again, it is important to point out that there are no hard and fast "ground" rules when it comes to this sort of thing. If you want to experiment, I would recommend you take this approach, and then you can figure out a technique that works for you. Condoms and lubricant are absolutely essential. Personally, I would stay away from the "ultra sensitive" or "featherlite" since these contain less material and may be more prone to breakage. This is a purely subjective opinion. Always ensure that the lubricant is water based, not oil based (since the oil can melt the latex).

I'm not sure what else to add. I hope that helps somewhat.

adser53

well im just wondering, if this is the LGB forum, wouldnt there be plenty of ppl into gay sex and lesbian sex and the like. I want to experience all the wonderful things a boyfriend could do to me i suppose.

So is there anybody that can help me?

adser53

thanks a mill 'swiss'

That is going to be great advice when im in that special moment with my partner.

Have you had much experience in this department 'swiss'?

swiss

Are you expecting tales of my sexual prowess?

Suffice it to say that I consider anal sex to be a very intimate act. I personally would not jump straight to it with the first guy I met, in either of the roles described above. I'm also mindful of the sexual health implications of engaging in the practice frequently with multiple partners.

Other than that, I'm probably no more or less promiscuous than the next gay man.

Boston

Take your time, don't be afriad to take it easy. If something doesn't feel right just stop, even if your partner or you yourself are in the middle of a passionate embrace. It's much better to stop, take a break, and start again then to get a phobia about things or feel pushed into it.

I agree with allot of what swiss said. There are many levels of intimacy, only one level involves actual sex. Infact Sex can have no intimacy at all. Not all gay/bi men have anal sex, let alone sex.

As for anal sex, I wouldn't recommend porn. It tends to be very artifical and lacks any intimacy between people. It also is, depending on the porn itself, very degrading to the act of sex. Lube is essential for your enjoyment. Ky jelly is excellent. Condoms are opinion, but if you wish to pratice safe sex I'd advice going for the extra protection thicker ones.

adser53

Id like to tell you all I didnt write this post, it was my openly gay college friend, aka Dirty Harry, who posted this thread under my name. He was too shy to post under his own name so he did it under mine without my knowledge. he is still a bit apprehensive about the whole thing so if anyone else has any input on the topic could they please PM him as I am receiving messages regarding the topic and as I am not gay, they are of no benefit to me. Thanks

snappieT

I know this seems insensitive, but try buying a dildo. It gets you used to the feeling and also you control how fast/far you go.

Not that I've done it.

Boston

I would recommend people not send Private messages to anybody about this issue. It is irrelavent who started this thread or for what reason. The issues raised may be of importance to others and I'd rather it wasn't closed or deleted.

snapscan1212p's suggestion is a good one. Many people use dildo's. Though few admitt to it. I fail to see why there is such a taboo about such things. If it helps try it.

ixoy

LiouVille wrote:

I would recommend people not send Private messages to anybody about this issue. It is irrelavent who started this thread or for what reason. The issues raised may be of importance to others and I'd rather it wasn't closed or deleted.

I happen to agree with you. It's better left here where people can discuss it. Nobody really cares who started the thread but what's here may help others. Continue to post here.

Hmm_Messiah

BOOK TITLE:
The Ins and Outs of Gay Sex by STEPHEN E. GOLDSTONE

Read it when I got into first serious r/ship with a guy. Written in a very readable way; not all medical terms and latin words.
Covers health etc, and also practicalities of "how to" in many areas of gay sex.