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Funny Chat Logs

  • 05-05-2005 6:31pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 69 ✭✭


    t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
    BlackAdder> i believe i speak for all of us when i say...
    BlackAdder> WRONG BTICH
    BlackAdder> IM SICK OF YOU
    BlackAdder> AND YOUR LAME STORIES
    BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE THINKS YOURE FUNNY
    BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR STORIES
    BlackAdder> IN FACT
    BlackAdder> IF YOU DIED RIGHT NOW
    BlackAdder> I DON"T THINK NOBODY WOULD CARE
    BlackAdder> SO WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT FAG
    *** t0rbad sets mode: +b BlackAdder*!*@*.*
    *** BlackAdder has been kicked my t0rbad ( )
    t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
    CRCError> right
    heartless> Right.
    r3v> right

    <anamexis> oh man
    <anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
    --> Beefpile (~mbeefpile@cloaked.wi.rr.com) has joined #themacmind
    <anamexis> and it exploded
    <anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
    <anamexis> but I got it away just in time
    <-- Beefpile has quit (sick ****ers)
    <anamexis> :<

    <mage> what should I give sister for unzipping?
    <Kevyn> Um. Ten bucks?
    <mage> no I mean like, WinZip?

    <NES> lol
    <NES> I download something from Napster
    <NES> And the same guy I downloaded it from starts downloading it from me when I'm done
    <NES> I message him and say "What are you doing? I just got that from you"
    <NES> "getting my song back ****er"

    <Jeedo> hey baby, whats up?
    <Indidge> umm....nothing?
    <Jeedo> So....want me to like come over today so we can ****?
    <Indidge> Wait....did you want to speak to my daughter?
    <Jeedo> Yes Mrs.Miller.. :-/

    docsigma2000: jesus christ man
    docsigma2000: my son is sooooooo dead
    c8info: Why?
    docsigma2000: hes been looking at internet web sites in ****ing EUROPE
    docsigma2000: HE IS SURFING LONG DISTANCE
    docsigma2000: our ****ing phone bill is gonna be nuts
    c8info: Ooh, this is bad. Surfing long distance adds an extra $69.99 to your bill per hour.
    docsigma2000: ...!!!!!! **** **** ****
    docsigma2000: is there some plan we can sign up for???
    docsigma2000: cuz theres some cool stuff in europe, but i dun wanna pauy that much
    c8info: Sorry, no. There is no plan. you'll have to live with it.
    docsigma2000: o well, i ccan live without europe intenet sites.
    docsigma2000: but till i figure out how to block it hes sooooo dead
    c8info: By the way, I'm from Europe, your chatting long distance.
    ** docsigma2000 has quit (Connection reset by peer)

    <ckx> women ask for it
    <ckx> they act all old and mature
    <ckx> and then you stick your cock up their ass
    <ckx> and they get all bitchy
    <ckx> "I"M ONLY 13, I'M ONLY 13!!!"

    <jeebus> the "bishop" came to our church today
    <jeebus> he was a ****en impostor
    <jeebus> never once moved diagonally

    <Th3No0b> Im going to be the next hitler
    <Th3No0b> Im going to kill all the jews and 1 clown
    <RageAgainsttheAmish> why the clown
    <Th3No0b> See? no one cares about the jews
    <RageAgainsttheAmish> lmao

    <LordChewy> so my dad found my porn folder
    <LordChewy> and he was getting all pissed
    <LordChewy> so its all like "does this surprise you? i'm not stupid you know"
    <LordChewy> "i know dad"
    <LordChewy> "what do you have to say for yourself?"
    <LordChewy> at this point i stare at him straight in the eyes and say "C:\Documents and Settings\Ricky\My Documents\faxes\sent faxes"
    <LordChewy> and he just shut up
    <kingKahn> what is it?
    <LordChewy> its his porn folder

    <MooseOnDaLoose> Hey Mike
    <goatboy> what?
    <MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
    <goatboy> er?
    <MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
    <goatboy> and?
    <MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
    <goatboy> ...
    <MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
    <goatboy> i dont get it
    <MooseOnDaLoose> AND YOU NEVER WILL.
    <goatboy> bastard

    <Beeth> Girls are like internet domain names, the ones I like are already taken.
    <honx> well, you can stil get one from a strange country :-P

    <xxxGirlygirlxxx> Thank you for listening to me.
    <xxxGirlygirlxxx> You know your a really good listener.
    <xxxGirlygirlxxx> Sweety please say something.
    <Sandaedar> Ok I'm back.

    <Eticam> I was in biology class once, and the teacher said there was sugar in sperm
    <Eticam> And a girl asked why doesn't it taste sweet then
    <Eticam> When she realised what she said her face became red like a spanked monkey ass
    <Eticam> Then the teacher said, because you taste sweetness with the front of your tongue, not the part of your tongue back in your throat
    <Eticam> The girl started crying and left class ^^

    <DaZE> at my school.. the cop from DARE passed around 3 joints to show everyone... and he said "if i dont get all three of these back this schools getting locked down and everyones getting searched till i find it.." and like 30 minutes later when everyone got to see 'em and they got passed back the cop had 4

    <@David&gt; Yay I get laid today! Been a month.... needing it by now
    <@Sony&gt; ...........
    <@Sony&gt; TMI TMI TMI
    <@David&gt; Only a few hundred pounds but its better than nothing
    <Malpine> Thanks for the info
    <@David&gt; eh?
    <@David&gt; damn i meant PAID
    <@David&gt; I get PAID today
    <@David&gt; dammit

    <Fashykekes> Capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse.." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse.."

    <frank> can you help me install GTA3?
    <knightmare> first, shut down all programs you aren't using
    frank has quit IRC. (Quit)
    <knightmare> ...

    <h|tler> HOW THE **** CAN YOU TELL THAT I'M 13 BY LOOKING AT WHAT I'M WRITEING?????????????????????????????????????????????????????

    <Locl-Yocl> I helped the EMTs at a car wreck and got blood all over my arms and shirt. It looked like I murdered 20 people with a fork... anyway, I walked into a convieniance store down the street and said my girlfriend needs a tampon. The guy at the counter was mortified.

    <robT> Name ONE thing that your windows comp can do that my MAC cant
    <bawss> Right click.

    <Sonium> someone speak python here?
    <lucky> HHHHHSSSSSHSSS
    <lucky> SSSSS
    <Sonium> the programming language

    <reo4k> just type /quit whoever, and it'll quit them from irc
    * luckyb1tch has quit IRC (r`heaven)
    * r3devl has quit IRC (r`heaven)
    * sasopi has quit IRC (r`heaven)
    * phhhfft has quit IRC (r`heaven)
    * blackersnake has quit IRC (r`heaven)
    <ibaN`reo4k[ex]> that's gotta hurt
    <r`heaven> :(

    *** Quits: TITANIC (Excess Flood)

    <Raven> I tried setting my hotmail password to penis.
    <Raven> It said my password wasn't long enough. :(

    <blazemore> LITTLETON, Colo. - Colorado officials plan to try a 15-year-old boy as an adult for allegedly offering a Sony PlayStation to have his aunt killed.
    <FlipTopBx> is it modded?

    JstWnnaHveFuN08: do you think i should call a guy friend and talk to him about my problems? or will he not care?
    Thilo: Here's how it works: if a guy helps you with your problems, you're obligated to give him a blowjob.
    JstWnnaHveFuN08: lol thanks that cheered me up
    Thilo: No problem. That'll be one blowjob please.

    <skrike> I think the people above me are having sex
    <skrike> either that or they're sleeping restlessly and agreeing with each other a lot.

    (Mootar) morons.
    (Mootar) these people who live in my apartment complex are connected to my wireless
    (Mootar) they must think they're super-cool hackers by breaking into my completely unsecure network
    (Mootar) unfortunatly, the connection works both ways
    (Mootar) long story short, they now have loads of horse porn on their computer

    <@Chin^&gt; My sister caught me jacking off the other week and calls me a pervert
    <@Chin^&gt; just the other day i walked into my room and caught my sister masturbating
    <@Chin^&gt; So she calls me a pervert again?!?
    <@Chin^&gt; there is no justice in the world...

    <MasterG> .....................................................................
    ..................................
    <judas> where's pacman when you need him?

    <glacial> I love school
    <glacial> Today our term paper due date's set
    <glacial> Our instructor says that we WILL hand in the paper on time, and she'll accept no excuses except illness, with a note from our doctor, or a death in the immediate family, with a note from the dead member.
    <glacial> So this wiseass pipes up: "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?"
    <glacial> She waits for the laughs to die down and says:
    <glacial> "Well, I guess you'll have to learn to write with your other hand"

    <Sigurd> a sprite is anything not static
    <SRElysian> a sprite is a variable object
    <SRElysian> be it 2d or 3d
    <TorMuck> a sprite is a ****ing soda
    <TorMuck> you god damn geekass bastards

    <Ich> I have passed the transitional stage of internet geekhood
    <Ich> I was cashiering at work today, and was punching in the code for plums, which is 4040.
    <Ich> and the 0 key doesn't work this well, so I punched it in wrong.
    <Ich> and the machine flashed up "Item Not Found: 404"
    <Ich> and I actually laughed out loud

    <Quake-Hat> brad, your mom is fine as ****
    <Quake-Hat> i think i will masturbate to her while i play with my balls
    <bad_brad> brad had to go blow his nose, but thanks for the compliment, i will be calling your mother
    <Quake-Hat> Jesus-****ing christ!!!


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 310 ✭✭modular


    www.bash.org

    I think these may be from.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 29,930 ✭✭✭✭TerrorFirmer


    Man, thats class. Had me laughing loads.

    Good stuff. :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,132 ✭✭✭Dinner


    Ah they're great.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,987 ✭✭✭✭zAbbo


    why didnt you just link to bash?


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,002 ✭✭✭acri


    sgske wrote:

    <frank> can you help me install GTA3?
    <knightmare> first, shut down all programs you aren't using
    frank has quit IRC. (Quit)
    <knightmare> ...


    hahaha!


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,591 ✭✭✭Corben Dallas


    <Beeth> Girls are like internet domain names, the ones I like are already taken.
    <honx> well, you can stil get one from a strange country :-P

    Legend. very funny :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,382 ✭✭✭petes


    These were class. I like these.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,082 ✭✭✭Tobias Greeshman


    I love the last one, pure class!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,374 ✭✭✭Gone West


    thats just a few from the top 50 on bash.
    WTF?


  • Registered Users Posts: 678 ✭✭✭Eye


    <Fashykekes> Capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse.." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse.."

    .... Class :D


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 953 ✭✭✭superconor


    oh my god i love that site. so many long nights!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,461 ✭✭✭--Kaiser--


    Fantastic :D !


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