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Science joke

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  • 31-05-2005 5:56pm
    #1
    grimloch
    Registered Users Posts: 3,688 ✭✭✭


    One day Heisenberg was bombing down the motorway when a cop stops him and asks "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which he replies "No but i do know where I am."

    maybe this belongs on the science board....


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    #2
    Sangre
    Registered Users Posts: 12,169 ✭✭✭✭Sangre


    Groan!!!!!!


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    #3
    Dinner
    Registered Users Posts: 2,132 ✭✭✭Dinner


    grimloch wrote:
    maybe this belongs on the science board....

    Yeah your probably right. It'd probably be funny if I knew who Heisenberg was and what the hell is going on.


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    #4
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Oh dear lord, that is probably the geekiest joke since

    8x/18y=64z walks into a bar,
    Barman says, 'Sorry mate, we don't cater for functions!'


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    #5
    grimloch
    Registered Users Posts: 3,688 ✭✭✭grimloch


    the joke was funny in light of my chemistry test today

    that function one is funny too


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    #6
    StupidLikeAFox
    Registered Users Posts: 7,711 ✭✭✭StupidLikeAFox


    bunch of nerds!








    i got them both :(


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    #7
    yawnstretch
    Registered Users Posts: 861 ✭✭✭yawnstretch


    Q: What goes "Pieces of seven! Pieces of seven!"?

    A: A parroty error.




    :D Hail the über-geek

    -yes I am doing my exams this week (M.Sc in misery)


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    #8
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    oh dear god. please stop me laughing


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    #9
    CrimE
    Closed Accounts Posts: 719 ✭✭✭CrimE


    Arabel wrote:
    Yeah your probably right. It'd probably be funny if I knew who Heisenberg was and what the hell is going on.

    Lol let why dont you pretend to know what its about and pretend to find it funny like me :)

    Or be an absolute gobshíte like sangre :rolleyes:


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    #10
    grimloch
    Registered Users Posts: 3,688 ✭✭✭grimloch


    sort of like how there are 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who dont

    id hazard that that was posted before but i saw in on a t-shirt not so long ago and was reminded earlier this afternoon


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    #11
    Shabadu
    Registered Users Posts: 7,659 ✭✭✭Shabadu


    yawnstretch wrote:
    Q: What goes "Pieces of seven! Pieces of seven!"?

    A: A parroty error.




    :D Hail the über-geek

    -yes I am doing my exams this week (M.Sc in misery)
    Hah ha ha- class.


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    #12
    DemonOfTheFall
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,279 ✭✭✭DemonOfTheFall


    Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle -

    It is impossible to know but the location and the velocity of an electron at the same time. (Or something like that)


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    #13
    Diarmsquid
    Registered Users Posts: 1,584 ✭✭✭Diarmsquid


    I feel stupid :mad:


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    #14
    bp_me
    Registered Users Posts: 1,648 ✭✭✭bp_me


    Sad to say I got them all :(


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    #15
    Sangre
    Registered Users Posts: 12,169 ✭✭✭✭Sangre


    CrimE wrote:
    Lol let why dont you pretend to know what its about and pretend to find it funny like me :)

    Or be an absolute gobshíte like sangre :rolleyes:

    Im a gob****e because I got the joke?....riiigght.

    Didn't get the pieces of seven one.


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    #16
    Milo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 55 ✭✭Milo


    Why are Physicists so bad in bed??

    Because when they have the time they don't have the energy and when they have the energy they don't have the time!

    A bad one but considering what went already! :D


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    #17
    MooShop
    Registered Users Posts: 974 ✭✭✭MooShop


    huh?? :confused:

    these "jokes" are stupid


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    #18
    meditraitor
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,207 ✭✭✭meditraitor


    What's Purple and commutes?


    An Abelian grape.


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    #19
    GoneShootin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,478 ✭✭✭GoneShootin


    As seen here


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    #20
    toiletduck
    Registered Users Posts: 2,379 ✭✭✭toiletduck


    i thought them jokes were good. oh no, im a nerd! :eek: :D


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    #21
    Zoton
    Registered Users Posts: 693 ✭✭✭Zoton


    The name's Bond, Ionic Bond, taken, not shared.

    /i'll get me coat :o


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    #22
    toiletduck
    Registered Users Posts: 2,379 ✭✭✭toiletduck


    Two hydrogens are walking along a street. The first one says, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!" The second one replies, "Are you sure?" The first one then says, "Yeah, I'm POSITIVE."

    / ill join ya outside :o


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    #23
    28064212
    Registered Users Posts: 10,654 ✭✭✭✭28064212


    What about a sticky for geek jokes? Seems to be a popular choice.

    If it wasn't for C, we'd be using BASI, PASAL and OBOL.

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    Chrome/Edge/Opera: https://chromewebstore.google.com/detail/boardsie-enhancement-suit/bbgnmnfagihoohjkofdnofcfmkpdmmce



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    #24
    Glipmac
    Closed Accounts Posts: 631 ✭✭✭Glipmac


    Goneshootin Lovin the sig mate very class, alas i am either slow or stupid but i am lost with the first joke... :o:(


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    #25
    Shabadu
    Registered Users Posts: 7,659 ✭✭✭Shabadu


    MooShop wrote:
    huh?? :confused:

    these "jokes" are stupid
    Perhaps it is you who is stupid.


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    #26
    GoneShootin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,478 ✭✭✭GoneShootin


    Shabadu wrote:
    Perhaps it is you who is stupid.

    Perhaps it is you that is stupid ?

    @Glipmac - thanks! Second one to mention it to me today :)


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    #27
    Stompbox
    Registered Users Posts: 1,811 ✭✭✭Stompbox


    CrimE wrote:
    Lol let why dont you pretend to know what its about and pretend to find it funny like me :)

    Or be an absolute gobshíte like sangre :rolleyes:

    Thats the funniest thing I've heard on the thread so far...LOL


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    #28
    danniemcq
    Registered Users Posts: 14,163 ✭✭✭✭danniemcq


    <FraX> How much blood did they want today?
    <Kederaji> Well, you know that questionnaire they ask you before they poke you with the needle?
    <FraX> Yeah.
    <Kederaji> Well, the guy took a look at me and started marking all the sex related questions as "No".
    <Kederaji> Didn't even bother to ask me, just marked them "No."
    <Kederaji> The bastard.
    <FraX> Was he right?
    <Kederaji> He was, but that's not the point!


    total nerd/geekism there brilliant!!!


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    #29
    Shabadu
    Registered Users Posts: 7,659 ✭✭✭Shabadu


    GoneShootin wrote:
    Perhaps it is you that is stupid ?

    Mebbe I should have put a [/McBain] at the end of it, It was meant to be like 'perhaps it is you who is the homosexual'.


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    #30
    Woow_Aqualung
    Closed Accounts Posts: 228 ✭✭Woow_Aqualung


    A neutron enters a bar and shouts across to the bartender "How much are the drinks?". The bartender replies "For you sir, no charge".

    A nugget of gold enters a bar and the bartender shouts at him " 'EY YOU!"

    It's dangerous to tell these in a Rugby locker room.


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