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Peter Kay

  • 05-06-2005 2:19am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 44,013 ✭✭✭✭


    Anyone who's seen "Phoenix Nights" and any of his two live shows on DVD knows the man is Legend material!

    Fantastic!!

    Anyone agree?

    PS - if you don't laugh (or giggle girlishly) at least one of the questions below.. there's something seriously wrong with you!
    Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

    Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

    Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

    Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

    Why do they use sterilised needles for death by lethal injection?

    Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

    Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a gun at him?

    Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

    Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

    What is the speed of darkness?

    Are there especially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at The Special Olympics?

    If you send someone 'Styrofoam', how do you pack it?

    If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

    If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

    If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

    Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

    If someone with a split personality threatens to commit suicide, is it a hostage situation?

    Can you cry under water?

    What level of importance must a person have, before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

    If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

    Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

    How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on bigger suitcases?

    Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up, like, every two hours?

    If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

    Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

    Why do doctors, when they ask you to strip, leave the room or close the cubicle curtain while you change? ..... They're still going to see you naked anyway.

    Peter a Legend? 23 votes

    Yay
    0% 0 votes
    Nay
    100% 23 votes


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,322 ✭✭✭Repli


    I don't get him at all to be honest, those "questions" aren't even original material


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,295 ✭✭✭jonnybadd


    I agree whole hartedly, the man is a true legend and should be ledgenised at all cost.

    Roller cola for an example for all those familiar


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 21,254 Mod ✭✭✭✭Dub13


    I dont like him....


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 44,013 ✭✭✭✭Basq


    Repli wrote:
    ..those "questions" aren't even original material
    Maybe not.. was fairly suspicious of them myself when i got them in an e-mail.

    But seriously, his live shows are absolute gold from start to finish!!
    jonnybad wrote:
    Roller cola for an example for all those familiar
    "It's crap pop!"
    "Get it drunk!"
    "I'm not drinking it.. I wouldn't clean me drains out with it!"
    "There's starving kids in Africa.."
    "Send it to them.... they'll send it back.. it's crap pop!"

    :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 192 ✭✭Eve e


    Yes for his Bullseye sketch on Jim( You can't beat a bit of Bully)Bowen. :)

    And Universal Truths http://homepages.nildram.co.uk/~starbug/truths.htm


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,352 ✭✭✭funky penguin


    If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

    Thats terrible.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,549 ✭✭✭scuba steve


    He can be a funny bastard.
    "Garlic Bread? Bread with garlic in it"


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,309 ✭✭✭RVN10


    Cheese cake, cheese cake you mean a cake made of cheese thats the future


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